You have a powerful feminine energy deep inside of you.
It is incredibly inspiring to men and to all people, beyond what you can imagine right now. Unfortunately, most of us do not embrace our unique feminine energy.
The question is what is feminine energy?
How do you give off feminine energy?
That is what we will address in this comprehensive article…
What IS Feminine Energy?
Feminine energy is the energy of life within you. It is an energy of ever-changing flow. It responds to emotion in relationships and seeks to feel and experience love.
Your feminine energy is similar to the energy of the ocean. The ocean is sometimes calm, sometimes wild.
It is sometimes colder, sometimes warmer. The ocean is sometimes unforgiving and life threatening, yet sometimes serene and peaceful.
As a woman with a feminine essence, feminine energy is ideally free to flow all throughout your body.
Here’s a comprehensive article on How to Be More Feminine: 18 Ways of A Soft Feminine Woman.
You can’t give off feminine energy if your feminine energy is always constricted by trauma or stress.
You cannot give off feminine energy if you have to constantly live through your masculine energy.
You cannot embody your feminine energy if you have an unhealthy cycle of the repeatedly drawing upon your masculine energy in order to survive and earn a living.
Allow all parts of you to come to surface
See, we all have many different personalities and energies within us. That’s completely normal.
It doesn’t make us weird or have split personalities, it just means that we are more than how we’ve learned to define ourselves.
You are masculine and you are feminine. If you are primarily a feminine soul (which means that you identify with the feminine energy), you will feel better living from your feminine energy most of the time.
If someone is a masculine soul and primarily masculine-identified, then they will feel more comfortable living through the masculine energy.
However, regardless of your feminine core, you are still many different kinds of people. This brings us to the question: how to bring out your high value and unique feminine energy?
You have different flavours of feminine energy within you
Yes, you have more than one ‘flavour’ of feminine energy within you as a woman.
These flavours are different parts of you that men love. Men love ‘tasting’ different flavours and you as a woman love to experience these different flavours within you.
It feels like infinity to embody different parts of you, doesn’t it?
If someone told you that you could be anything you want for a day – and feel anything you want – and not be penalised for it, wouldn’t that feel nice?
As a unique feminine woman, you want to experience the many flavours of yourself. You may just not feel like you have permission to do so.
This is one reason why men who are not already in love with and committed to one woman have a tendency (key word – tendency) to want to experience sex with all different women. It is to experience the different “flavours” and energies of different women.
So, the more we reject different parts of ourselves that are dying to be expressed inside, the less whole and unique we really are. And the less high value we are in relationship to men, generally speaking.
How to give off feminine energy…
Learn to be seen & appreciated for your feminine soul, not just your masculine attributes
But what if you’re a woman who is afraid to be all of herself or to embrace her feminine energy?
Well, that’s almost all of us.
Sometimes I think that although women are keen to get rights and become equal with men, in the process, we’ve started to compete with men.
To do that, we’ve sometimes become too obsessively identified with the linear, directed go-getter in ourselves – the masculine energy.
This is a wonderful thing – but it’s not wonderful when we obsessively identify with it JUST because we feel desperate to be seen and acknowledged by people (but especially men).
I mean, imagine if the men of the world who naturally identify more with the masculine energy began to compete with women in their radiance and beauty.
What if a man tried to compete with you on how well you could both breastfeed your baby?
First of all, it’s a losing battle.
Second of all, that’s just weird.
Some men do kind of act like this though, actually! And in my view, it is not the most pleasant experience to be around them.
The divine feminine energy needs to be seen for its radiance
If you are feminine at your core, then a deep desire you would have is to be seen.
This is because in our core, we are light. We are energy. We are flowing, changing energy of love. And that deserves to be seen and loved.
That is simply a characteristic of the feminine energy.
Although, it has been made wrong or ‘weak’ to many of us. In other words, it’s not ok to simply wear a dress or smile and receive love.
Instead, we have to over-exert ourselves to become something that we are not, so that we can fit in.
The idea of simply being light (or being the “ocean” that is the feminine) is made wrong and undeserving of love in many ways. In other words, many women think that they have to ‘do a lot’ or “achieve goals” to be worthy of belonging and love.
So, lots of women (including myself) along the way, have been lead to think giving off masculine energy is the way to be identified and seen. Yay! (not really).
We try to achieve status and ‘win’ things. We think that to be worthy, we have to become the top of the rung, or to dominate people. This significance seeking is the driver of masculine energy. Feminine energy is more driven by connection.
(What Is The One Specific Emotional Trigger Within Every Single Man in this World That Inspires Him to WANT to Commit to One Woman, Want to Take Care of Her, Worship Her and Only Her? Click here to find out right now…)
Feminine energy vs masculine energy
If we’re truly feminine inside, what we really want is to be SEEN and appreciated for is our love energy.
This is what we truly want deep in our soul and in our body. And if we try to be ‘seen’ for our achievements and the way we dominate a field, interesting things happen.
For example, rather than being seen as a woman who is alive, feminine, expressive and loving, those of us who are more feminine inside might begin to feel angry and resentful.
Because we’ve done all this work to be ‘worthy’, but we still feel like something blissful is missing.
That ‘something blissful’ is the feeling of being acknowledged deeply as a feminine soul.
That ‘something blissful’ is the feeling of being completely out of control of ourselves. (yes, the feminine energy is not in control).
To be seen for masculine energy just doesn’t cut it for a feminine woman.
We got a degree. Awesome.
We can fix our car. Awesome.
We can be ‘smart’ and fix problems. Awesome.
I do get it. I have a law degree myself. (Though I almost dropped out in my final year. Just burnt out!)
But as ‘smart’ as my degree on a piece of paper (along with my impressive debt from my degree), completing my law degree never made me feel blissful.
It never helped me surrender in the bedroom and it never helped me give off feminine energy.
It made me feel the success I deserved to feel.
Success in a masculine realm is nothing compared to experiencing the fullness of our feminine soul!
But it’s nothing like the feeling of responding to my children who need me. It’s nothing like giving life to my children.
It’s certainly nothing compared to the bliss of resonating with other humans.
Because the law degree is successful, but empty.
It’s shiny and better than being “uneducated” (apparently), but it’s rather empty.
The truth is that there’s nothing wrong with having my masculine energy in tact when I need it. My masculine energy has helped me beyond measure.
But who I am inside is a feminine soul.
The gift of masculine men & feminine women
I for one, appreciate the evolved masculine men of the world who don’t ‘reject’ the core who they truly are. The directed men who are that way because they just ARE. They were born that way.
The ones who are strong willed but don’t force themselves on us. Those are the men who enjoy being who they really were born to be. They don’t feel it’s wrong to be who they are.
The men who have and use the gift of a strong masculine direction. That strong, impersonal and capable masculine direction that you as a woman could never truly compete with.
I feel these masculine men as a gift – mainly because it IS a gift. They were born that way.
And they haven’t tried to twist themselves out of shape. They haven’t covered their true desire for challenge and for freedom with layers of ‘must please people by being super sensitive, radiant and unthreatening’.
While a man is never 100% valuable in your life without a well developed feminine energy, if he uses feminine qualities as a way to be a people pleaser – that doesn’t feel good to the smart women who are witnessing it.
And we only develop our desire to people please, or our desire to wear masks in order to get approval and to fit in.
The men and women of the world who are cool with being who they truly are, usually don’t take as much value.
Because they aren’t entering in to relationships with an exchange in mind. Ie; I do this for you in the hope that you’ll give me approval in return. Ie: I will pretend to be someone I am not – because I’m afraid of losing love if I don’t do this.
Check out this deep discussion I had with my husband on masculine versus feminine energy…
How to embody & exude your unique & high value feminine energy?
The first step to being your high value feminine self, it is to now begin the process of making every single part of you ok. It’s the process of making every feeling you have ok.
How to exude feminine energy: 2 aspects
There are 2 aspects to embodying your unique feminine energy.
STEP 1: Make every single part of yourself ok. The sexual parts, the angry parts, the happy-go-lucky as well as the emo parts. The overwhelmed, ‘can’t do it anymore’ parts, the masculine parts, the feminine parts, and the depressing parts. All of you.
The people you see around you that you judge and hate?
That person or those types of people may also have been you, or a part of you at some stage in your life.
STEP 2: Honour and respect every feeling you have.
When you make different feelings ok – you don’t go out and start resenting men for triggering you to feel that way.
You don’t make everything and everyone else wrong, you just are.
You let the feeling happen because you know that this is life, and feelings happen. They’re meant to happen in relationships and it’s not his fault.
Men aren’t necessarily always the perpetrators of how we feel, although they can definitely contribute to how and what we feel.
Our hatred and resistance of our own dark emotions is a problem. It doesn’t allow us to be all of our unique feminine energy!
Remember, feminine energy is dark and it is light.
We can’t resist the emotions that make us feel the least capable, because if we do, all that is at the other side is a resentful, defensive woman for others to deal with.
When we resist our vulnerability, all that is left is actually a combative, self-defensive response. This is because our bodies are in the midst of perceiving a threat to our safety.
The real safety, unless we are in a real life dangerous situation is to feel how scared we are behind our tension and our need to blame men.
Why? Because once the feeling is felt, and our bodies see that we are actually not about to die from letting the feeling happen, we get to the next stage.
Our bodies are free to go to the next feeling. What feelings you allow to happen, will eventually pass.
How to access all the different ‘flavours’ of your feminine energy
First of all, let’s look at how you can connect deeper with the feminine energy inside of you. When you can access more of that femininity, then there’s more of you to be able to connect deeper with masculine men.
So step number 1 in accessing all the different flavours of your unique feminine energy.
STEP 1: Surround yourself with lots of women and let their energy inspire that same energy inside of you.
Even if you haven’t made it ok to be like that in decades. Meet with and chat with different women. Open, free women are your best answer.
You are still able to have your closer, more special friends, but you would want to at least talk to and socialise with women of all different energies and backgrounds.
And open your body when you’re with them. Stay out of your head if that’s your habit. Instead, stay in your body.
Let who THEY are inspire and bring to life the parts of you that are dormant.
What is the point of letting other women inspire the different parts of you to come out?
It is so that you can relate to them. Because you’re mirroring their energy, and you get the gift of lighting the fire in all the different ‘flavours’ of personalities in yourself that you’ve killed due to self judgement.
For me, the hardest part to be was the extroverted part of me. When I was young, I was very expressive and extroverted. My mother was like this. She had a gift of being able to talk to anyone without judging herself. I was like that, too as a little girl.
Until I hit my teens and I was all like ‘Nup. Gotta stay closed now. People aint safe. Gotta be on guard now.’
Still always choose your friends carefully
What do you do when you meet women who don’t seem to make good friends?
Well, there’s still value in them. But they quickly lose their value if they exclude you and make you wrong for being the way you are. Especially even after repeated attempts on your part to connect with them.
It’s ok to exclude people from your circle. The idea is not to make friends of everybody. Very few people will ever be a good friend to you anyway.
In fact, at some point you have to ask yourself: are low value friends even worth it?
However, you can have acquaintances. Acquaintances are there for a chat and for some conversation and fun here and there.
A friend is someone you’re loyal to. A friend is someone you are loyal to.
You’re not going to get that from most people!
So even though you won’t want to make friends with everyone, it is still ok to seek diversity and embrace diversity beyond your comfort zone.
So, perhaps talk with women you normally would judge.
If that doesn’t work for you, let the energies of other women you wish to be permeate you.
If you’re afraid of being bubbly, enjoy being around a woman who is bubbly, and let her personality resonate with you!
This is the first key to bringing your unique, high value feminine energy to life.
STEP 2: As you interact, notice when your belly knots up with closed judgement and fear.
It’s ok to have the fear and the judgement. But it might be nice if you asked yourself; ‘is it needed right now, with this woman?’
She might be able to gift you with her energy and you might be able to gift each other.
Hanging around men all the time isn’t enough to help fuel our feminine soul.
Being with other feminine souls will really help, though!
And the best thing about it is that once we do this, we naturally become more attractive. This is because it multiplies our ability to access different parts of ourselves, thereby multiplying how attractive we are!
By the way, if you’d like to learn the ONE thing you can say to ANY man to capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say, you would be a very smart woman! Find out what that one thing you can say is here.
Being attractive for a woman is love energy and aliveness. This DOESN’T mean being happy all the time!
Depression and sadness is still aliveness. That is if you let depression and sadness be felt until it is gone – rather than using it in the long term to snatch attention from people habitually.
I used to do this. And yes, it took a lot of value from others.
Feminine Women need to be with Other Feminine Women
In the days where we lived in tribes of 50-100 or more, often, the women had the freedom to be with each other and socialise. And the men would be with other men.
By doing his, men would become more masculine and women became more feminine.
Feminine energy begets feminine energy and masculine energy begets masculine energy. Being around other feminine souls increases our feminine energy.
So choose the right feminine women to spend your time with! It will enrich your feminine soul.
Our day to day responsibilities can drain our feminine energy
Nowadays, we go and work and drudge through a work day our soul hates – and it makes our authentic energy dormant.
It’s like we don’t have time to do the things that light us up anymore.
We become exhausted and drained. So drained that all we know is to try to escape, rather than truly live.
We want to escape the monotony of responsibility. We want to escape the soul crushing feeling that is doing things that don’t feed our feminine soul.
That’s understandable. But escaping isn’t really a solution. We need to actively choose to add value to ourselves outside of work as well.
I know it just seems like yet another thing to do!
But i’m talking about making a point to fill your feminine energy up by being around other feminine souls. If that is not feasible, you can create a more feminine home environment full of plants, flowers, candles and pretty linen or pretty pictures.
You can even just make a point to simply take a warm bath surrounded by candles every night after work! (as a mother I know it’s hard for moms to do this, but I guess that’s the price to pay for being a mom!)
If you’re not a mom and don’t have children constantly trying to get your attention, perhaps you may consider the ritual of taking a nice warm bath.
A warm bath will help you relax in to your body again and feel, instead of being in your head!
Do you know the dark art of “High Value Banter” that helps you quickly weed out the wrong types of men and create emotional attraction with the “BEST of MEN”? CLICK HERE to learn how in this free class.
Fill your feminine soul up first before expecting your man to be everything for you
A lot of us neglect to fill ourselves up before we come back to the relationship. In other words, we expect our relationship to fill us up and we treat our relationship as a place to just go and take. (It’s not only women who do this of course. Men do it too!)
Don’t expect your man to make your feminine soul or your feminine body feel alive again.
It’s so easy for us to come home to a man – and hope that since he’s our ‘best friend’, we should feel alive just by going home to him.
Not really. Part of being high value is getting the feminine energy from other women (or our girlfriends) so that we are free to not rely on a man for EVERYTHING.
He can’t be everything all of the time. He might be a very dynamic human being, but would you want to burden a man with being everything for you?
He can’t take every single role all the time. Especially if he’s a particularly busy man.
Plus, you don’t really want him to become a replacement girlfriend, right?
We will have more feminine energy, and therefore our relationship will be more passionate when we don’t expect our man to take the role of our girlfriend, mother, dad, sister, and lover.
…The relationship then has the chance to be more passionate when we naturally bring our energy and aliveness to the table because we’ve already filled ourselves up with the fuel we need.
I’ve also put together a short quiz to see how much you are living in your feminine energy… Click here to take the quiz “How Feminine Am I Actually?”
There is no woman that you can’t be (honour the women you admire)
When looking at other women, remember that the parts of them that you admire, whether it’s a particular energy or a personality trait, can also be a part of you!
There’s no woman that you cannot be!
Also, why don’t you make a commitment to yourself right now? Do a small exercise with me. Tell me about a woman friend (or some women friends) you have and admire!?
What qualities do they have that you admire?
Are they extroverted while you feel you are not? Are they spontaneous? Open? Loving?
Perhaps they are very sensual and you fear you are not.
See, what you admire in another is what you are often afraid to be yourself. So by writing it down here in the comments below, you can remind yourself that you already ARE that very woman whom you admire so much.
(By the way, I want to teach you 5 secrets to having your man fall deeply in love with you and beg you to be his one and only. These 5 secrets are inside of my new program, and right now. Click HERE to get yourself a copy of this program!)
Lots of Love as always…
If you want to be supported by a warm community of high value feminine women, then join our Facebook Group. (It’s free and so incredibly valuable!) CLICK HERE TO join thousands of other women in our “High Value Feminine Women” Community.
By the way, while you’re at it, connect with me on social media.
Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.