Your Resentment For Men…

Women who resent men will only make men resent them as well.

As a woman who’s been on the receiving end of abuse (as most of us have), I understand the feeling of resentment towards men, or towards our abuser.

As a woman who’s been on the receiving end of many insults and bullying from men and women alike….as a person who knows what it feels like to be used and abused and treated like a pet by a sociopath…for more than 20 years, I respect the value of anger towards the people who have wronged us.

The anger has a purpose for your soul and mine.

So, do talk about your pain. Process your pain.

Process your GUILT from hurting men and causing them pain too.

We Have ALL Been Burned

Everyone has abused and been abused.

Everyone has suffered in love and dating. Everyone has been burned.

I have hurt my lover and I have been hurt.

But resentment and mud-slinging is not all I am.

I am human and I am capable of resentment as well as love and compassion.

I am capable of objective appreciation and understanding of men, the very species (of which a few) made me feel like I was not enough at times.

Many women I talk to and who read my work are quite thoughtful. But I sense that some of us are still suffering.

That suffering sometimes comes out in the form of resentful comments towards men.

That suffering sometimes comes out towards other members in our Facebook group, and yes, towards myself and David at times.

That’s OK. I didn’t sign up for this because it’s easy.

And I’ve been doing this a long time, so there’s close to nothing I haven’t seen.

But if you are suffering, here’s what I believe is most important right now: I believe it’s more important to take responsibility for your feelings, for your past, your choices and for your future.

Take responsibility for where you are now, and what you feel.

When Women Resent Men, Men Resent Women

Here’s what I know: if we as women go out into the dating world and show up with resentment or entitlement (they go hand in hand), here’s what will happen:

MEN will also become more resentful and entitled.

Nobody wins if nobody has the courage to take responsibility.

Our gender doesn’t determine our entitlements.

And there’s nothing like a courageous woman, full of love and value to inspire men to be better.

It’s not our past that determines how we’re entitled to act towards people now.

So, can we stand up, dust ourselves off and take back our innocence now?

Take Back Your LOVE For Men

Take back your innate love for men, and your joy for connecting with men.

You have everything you need within you to do that now.

After all, you’re a woman. And you have more power than you know.

Take responsibility for approaching dating men with a sense of understanding, curiosity and playfulness.

If you have suffering, ok.

Grieve. And grieve now.

The more resentment you allow to build up, the more resentment you’ll bring into your own life, and you’ll see doom and gloom everywhere because you’re looking for it.

Don’t punish a whole species of men, just because a few have wronged you

Don’t punish a whole species of men, because they might just make you feel punished in return.

It’s reciprocal.

Resentment begets resentment.

Appreciation begets appreciation.

You don’t get better at vetting the low value men by thinking from fear or taking more actions from fear. (Of course your fear is very useful when it’s useful, but most of the time, it’s not useful).

And you don’t get better at vetting men by being resentful.

You get better at vetting them by becoming better yourself first.

That’s because we can only tolerate those who are like us, those who vibrate at the same level.

It is only when you are better (more resourceful) yourself, that you can choose better.

As that age old saying goes…

”Be the change you want to see in the world.”

renee wade

P.S. Connect with me on social media

Our new Facebook Group is here… Join the “High Value Feminine Women” Community using this link

P.P.S. Here are 7 Common Signs A Woman is Low Value in the Eyes of Men.

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Hayden
Hayden

Well said !
No woman deserves to be a victim of abuse. This act is a fuel for a lot of failed relationships. Some women who have been abused sexually and kept it to themselves tends to punish their spouses. It’s hard for a woman to overcome such trauma, but with her husbands selfless support, he can also remind her of her worth and of their love for each other.

Sara
Sara

I wish I had met friends like you in life, instead of all the wrong people I let in.

We live and learn, I guess.

Liya
Liya

You are such a compassionate and lovely soul! Love this. Needed this.
You’re amazing…

Belka
Belka

Love all your articles. They are soo sooo helpful!

Holly
Holly

Yayyyyyyyy!! What an amazing article 😀 (I have just screen shot the end part with the feeling of it would be worth keeping hold of). Have also screen shot some of the questions answered on the Instagram… one inparticular in reference to someone higher up decided it would be a good idea to break up family units (creating need to depend on government). That should totally be a quote… “we have all be abused and abused; we’ve all been bured”. It really puts things into perspective with painting human connections into a balanced pointment of view — paving the way… Read more »

Erica
Erica

I left a comment on this site a few weeks ago, and you replied Renee.
When I was reading what I had written and your reply. It made me realise that I’m still full of resentment. I felt like I was getting better.
But then I also think of the unhealthy amount of time I spend reading relationship forums. I guess this pandemic brought a lot of feelings home

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