For the purpose of this article, I am going to assume that the men you want to attract are the men who see your vulnerability and want to adore you and take care of you forever.
So let’s try a little exercise:
I want you to ask yourself a question.
When you feel something around a man, do you normally cover it up?
(I’m not talking about telling a man you love him. I’m talking about the array of emotions that may surface within your body.)
How do you think most average women interact with their man, or men in general from day-to-day?
Are they living an average life where they can’t truly be themselves and live in their own feminine (or masculine) core?
Are they trying to look smart and in control?
Are they in a relationship where they always have to complain about their man?
Or is their love so deep and their relationship so passionate that they would never need to look anywhere else?
How To Radiate Feminine Energy: It’s Not About Talking more.
See, the words we speak are mostly blind to what is really going on inside.
As women, we often interact and show up in a way that minimizes our own vulnerability and our ability to feel.
We say ‘Oh it’s okay…”
When our real feeling is that we are scared.
We say ‘Oh maybe he was just….a little forgetful or busy.”
When inside, we feel afraid to lose him.
We say: ‘Oh, he’s depressed and going through a lot of work stress at the moment.’
Well, what if we actually are angry at him?
And what if that anger serves you?
Would you be open to the idea of letting yourself feel that anger, as long as it’s not directed towards him in a way that punishes him?
I certainly hope so. Because your anger is there to help you adjust and make quicker decisions in your relationships.
This anger not only helps you navigate, it helps inspire your man to make better decisions, too!
(And if he doesn’t like your emotion at all, if he tries to suppress it or control it, then you know that you have a man you cannot trust.)
If you want to radiate feminine energy and attract the depth of love you crave, try to listen to yourself when you are talking.
You may consider that you do often say what you think men want to hear.
You may also want to consider that your words aren’t the same thing as your authentic feminine vulnerability!
Why is this important?
It’s important because ‘talking’ and ‘wording’ things in a way that is palatable for others doesn’t inspire deep devotion from men.
It is your authentic primary emotion that helps you radiate feminine energy and authenticity!
For most women, their words merely dull their feminine energy, unless they’re using it to communicate their deepest primary emotion.
You may consider that you say things or engage in your own thoughts to try to dull your emotions, or gut instinct, as if they are wrong (?!)
You may consider that you sometimes say what makes you look GOOD.
You may consider that many of the words you say are spoken to make yourself look cool, smart, in control, and consistent (feminine energy is NEVER is consistent, though).
We change with the weather. We change with other people’s emotions.
We are naturally changing and therefore responsive creatures that have had this intelligent responsiveness conditioned out of us, either through neglect and abuse in infancy and childhood (so we shut down and develop an insecure attachment style). Or through life circumstances like going to school, going to work, and trying to fit in with a group of ‘average’ friends…
It’s not you, it’s the way you were raised. It’s what this society teaches us to be.
(Why is this important? It is because your core attachment style largely dictates and influences what happens in your relationship. Thus it’s imperative you understand your core attachment style!)
How To Radiate Feminine Energy: The Little Known Secret
Talk less and feel more!
Men respond best to your feelings, and not to you talking.
You can’t converse your way to a man’s heart.
You have to feel deeper, be more embodied, and sink deeper into your bodily wisdom in order to reach a man’s heart.
This deeper feeling and embodiment inspires deeper trustability in men, and it repels the men who aren’t serious about you.
This is because the men who aren’t serious will not want to spare the energy and resources to connect to it or to attune themselves to it.
(By the way here are the top 3 dating red flags.)
Here’s a video I made on how to be more feminine and soft in 4 simple steps:
In this society, we are taught that looking good is more important than being who we really are in our true nature, whether that’s masculine, feminine or neutral.
What you’ll realize though, is that, in order to be in your authentic feminine energy (if that’s what you are, underneath all the masks), then you’ll need to talk less and FEEL more.
Because talking sometimes stops you from feeling.
Talking can be cathartic, but most people don’t talk to feel deeper. They talk to justify themselves and to keep authentic, difficult feelings at bay!
Once you feel more, and talk a little less, you are and WILL be naturally more feminine because you are being more of yourself.
This is the way I have learned to become more of who I actually am, not who I think I SHOULD be.
I struggle with talking BS, especially to my parents; mostly to my parents. Because they were the ones I felt I had to impress and please.
Those times when I actually have the awareness to remember and pull myself up on my BS, I let go of the talk.
I just connect instead, which is what we really want.
Even with my husband, I’ve learned to feel more and relate more. I smile, I dance, I ask him about HIM, I kiss him sometimes. And it flows, the way it is designed to flow between a masculine man and feminine woman.
Your Feminine Energy Will NOT Be Value For ALL Men
Disclaimer: Please don’t think that radiating more feminine energy is the answer to having more approval from more men.
SOME men see no value in it.
Some men may run from you when you do what I am suggesting; because they don’t all want to connect with you and attune themselves to you.
It’s a GOOD thing if these ones want to run from you!
See, when you remain open and vulnerable, not every man can take it. And that’s what we want!
You don’t have to bare your soul open on the first date. In fact, I’d advise against that.
But if you are an embodied feminine woman, then you’ll naturally fee more emotion, and this emotion will serve you to attract the men who are wanting a real relationship, too!
We want to get rid of the weaker men who will just run because we are not willing to settle for anything less than a man who tries to connect to you.
In order to weed out the men who aren’t serious, just BE.
If you succumb to demands of how you think you should be, you’ll never know how to eliminate the wrong kinds of men.
You should also always be testing any men that you date, so that you find out quickly, whether they are truly worth your time. Here’s how to test a man to see if he cares.
The right man will come eventually, even if that’s a newer version of your existing boyfriend/husband.
If you want something even more powerful for having men find you emotionally attractive, I’d suggest you read my article on how to build emotional attraction with men.
Feeling Emotions Is Your Key To Using Feminine Energy To Attract Men
Connecting on a surface level doesn’t take much integrity and authenticity for women.
Yet when we women want to connect, we show up differently to men. We feel different.
It’s almost as if we are not there to take something from a man, but rather, we’re there to give them more emotional depth and meaning in their lives!
So, feel that which you actually feel. Don’t avoid it.
Avoiding feeling it just takes you away from your authentic energy.
Now, I’m not saying don’t talk with your words.
I’m saying, listen to yourself talk if you want to radiate deeper femininity.
Are you speaking to avoid feeling?
If so, that won’t help you on your path of using feminine energy to attract a man.
Certainly, when it comes to connecting with girlfriends, talk can be the most valuable thing in the world.
It CAN be. But right now, we’re talking about interacting with a man.
Deeper femininity attracts deeper men. Men you can trust!
But to appeal to the men who want to go deeper, you have to be willing to eliminate the men who aren’t interested in anything beyond sex.
How do you know if a man actually likes you or just wants to use you for sex?
You can read my article on How To Tell What A Guy Wants From You.
How To Radiate Feminine Energy: Give Yourself This Gift
So, give yourself the space to feel deeper.
Don’t avoid feeling your anger (yes, avoid blaming people, and avoid spraying old pent up emotions at a man as if it really is his fault).
But remember that anger can be valuable, just as sadness and hurt is valuable.
Your emotions, no matter how much other people told you that your feelings aren’t important or to ‘stop’ feeling them – they are here to protect you.
They affirm your existence.
Maybe that’s why it’s so hard to feel them, because it’s almost like saying ‘hey! I matter. My boundaries and my desires and my hurts matter!”
And that is hard to do when we were raised to keep things surface and keep emotions inside.
Society demands us to avoid feeling the deeper emotions that would cause men to want to take care of us (vulnerability is what makes men devote themselves to you).
Instead, we’ve become accustomed to covering things up with words and actions that we think make us ‘fit in’ or look good.
To help you feel your emotions so that you can become more feminine and communicate your vulnerability in a high value way, I made this video:
Surface femininity (dressing and acting solely for the approval of others) attracts surface men!
(Related: What is fake & superficial femininity?)
Deep femininity attracts men with deeper and more trustworthy masculine energy!
But first, you have to be willing to trust the light that is feminine energy that you were born with OVER trusting the garbage that you sometimes use to cover up the vulnerable, real you.
It’s that light of you, the spontaneous you, that men crave, and it’s not always pretty. Sometimes is a little dark, and that’s ok. As long as you’re not expressing your emotions in a way that punishes him.
If you would like to know how you can express your vulnerability in a high value way, read my article on How To be Vulnerable Without Being NEEDY.
Remember that your feminine energy is definitely not predictable or in control. You have to be ok with that, at the very least, even if other people have a rule for themselves that they aren’t allowed to have emotions or be out of control.
(By the way, I’ve just published my brand new program titled “Becoming His One & Only!”… Click HERE to find out more details and how you can get your man to fall deeper in love with you and beg you to be his one and only)
P.S – By the way, men are naturally attracted to these 17 Attraction Triggers, click here and start attracting the man who adores you.
P.P.S – When you start to respect and honour your own deep desire for connection, and when you embody your vulnerability with men (or people in general), you can start to get annoyed with surface people, and people who hide away.
You start to dislike the surface culture. Remember to be patient with people. You don’t want to make what they do ‘wrong’, because that keeps you in the old cycle of fear or separation. Just respect that it is there for a reason, and people are like that for a reason.
If you want to be supported by a warm community of high value feminine women, then join our Facebook Group. (It’s free and so incredibly valuable!) CLICK HERE TO join thousands of other women in our “High Value Feminine Women” Community.
By the way, while you’re at it, connect with me on social media.
Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.