It turns out that there are some clear signs a man is falling in love. Signs that are unusual, but will tell you (as clear as day) that yes, this man is most definitely, undeniably in love with you.
These 5 unusual signs are what I’m going to share with you in this article.
But before we start on that, let me share with you 3 important principles about a man in love…
- A man in love with you will move mountains for you.
- Never lose hope that he is out there, because there is a man out there who will love you that much.
- You can inspire almost any man to love you this much through putting the connection and attraction first.
You can watch my video on the 5 unusual signs a man is falling in love with you…
(If your man does these things he’s madly in love with you!)
Table of Contents
It is possible to inspire a man to fall madly in love with you!
Any woman who has a man madly in love with her has knowingly or unknowingly inspired that love from him.
And she has inspired that love from him through the basic principles that create emotional attraction and emotional connection.
Principles that foster mutual vulnerability, emotional depth and everlasting romantic love.
Everlasting?! Yes, the hormones of romantic love, ie: dopamine and norepinephrine do wear off over time.
Yet, research has shown time and again that it is more than possible to keep the spark of romantic love and romantic attraction alive through a lifetime together!
These simple principles of inspiring a man to fall in love, and keeping the romantic love alive are accessible to any woman. No matter her background, age, looks, or social status.
So as you read this, always remember that you have the power within you to inspire any man to love you this much.
I’ve seen plenty of women do this by using the resources that they had forgotten already exists inside of them.
Read: How To Tell If A Guy Likes You: 6 Signs & 1 Test.
Now let’s find out all about the weird signs he’s falling for you.
Sign number 1: He tries to find solutions to every problem you have,
…even the problems that you thought were impossible to solve!
A man in love can suddenly become outstandingly resourceful in ways that he’s never been before. And he just cares more to give to you!
As you would probably already know, men generally love to solve problems and feel successful at solving problems. Yet, at the same time, solving your problem takes energy, and a lot of energy at that.
As such, this is one of the most certain signs a man is falling in love. It is that probably at least 70% of the time in which you have a problem, he will want to, and work to, solve that problem for you.
He’ll especially want to solve the ones that seemingly, no one else can solve for you.
So the next time you find yourself wondering how does a man act when he’s falling in love with you – think about this:
A man who is really in love with you will not even think twice about spending a lot of physical and emotional energy on you.
Contrast that with a man who isn’t in love and just wants casual sex. And that’s why this is one of the signs that a man is falling in love with you.
This wanting to solve your problem reminds me of the movie “The Box”, with Cameron Diaz and James Marsden in it.
It wasn’t the main point of the movie, but in the movie, his wife had a problem with her leg that caused her to limp. Her husband was so admirably trying to make or provide a prosthetic leg for her.
It is just a critical sign of a man who is in love with a woman. He becomes extra resourceful and willing to solve your problems.
Sign number 2: He tries to provide more & better than your ex boyfriend(s) did
When a man has fallen in love with you, that actually means he has developed a powerful emotional connection with you over time.
And as such, he might eventually come to feel like providing for you is his ‘purpose’.
This doesn’t mean that he can’t have another purpose outside of you, of course. Ideally, he would have another purpose or mission as a strong masculine man.
But providing for you is definitely a part of that purpose. That purpose moves him emotionally. Because you are something precious that he wants to hold onto.
A man who isn’t in love (but is perhaps casually involved with a woman), would never feel a deep purpose or calling to provide for her.
A man who is just with a woman out of convenience, might provide at least a little something for her. Whether that be a little bit of help solving problems around the house, or giving her some cash here and there.
However, he’ll never provide more than enough to just keep you around.
He will also often give a woman crumbs. A man in love would never just give you crumbs!
Remember that distinction. To understand more about this critical distinction, read this article about the women men commit to versus the women men leave.
And yet, a man who is falling madly in love with you will be different. He wouldn’t just want something casual with you, because you are just too precious to him!
If he is falling in love, a man will specifically even want to provide more than anyone else has for you in the past. It’s a wonderful feeling for a woman.
If he’s giving you crumbs, that’s a sign that he is not falling in love
If you feel like a man is giving you crumbs, that could be a sign that he’s not in love.
So now is the time to ask yourself:
‘Is it worth my time and energy investing in a man who is not nearly as invested in me?’
And another question:
‘What price do I really put on my time?’
(I’ll give you a hint: maybe you don’t put a high enough price on your time!’)
You see, for men, they inherently feel the need to prove themselves resourceful and worthy of keeping a high value woman.
He wants to keep her love (and her reproductive resources) all to himself.
Here are some examples of the way men have to prove themselves worthy of a high value woman who is worth keeping.
Men need to have confidence, resourcefulness, ambition, emotional stability, to earn enough money, etc.
And this is especially true when a man is madly in love with you. He will want to provide you with more, and better than you ever had.
Even if he physically can’t provide in the near future. It’s the desire and the effort he puts in to do so.
You may not see the fruits of his effort immediately, but he will want to see you provided for, better than you have ever been before.
And that is to provide for you emotionally, financially, and spiritually. Money is not the only thing a man can ‘provide’.
Read also: Can A Broke Or Jobless Man Still Be High Value?
It is low value to feel entitled to a man’s resources
One thing to always remember:
We cannot just feel entitled to a man treating us like this.
Feeling entitled to a man treating us this way is not the way to raise your value.
In fact, as a woman, having an entitled value-sucking mentality is one way to show up low value.
(By the way, do you know the 7 common signs a woman is low value in the eyes of men (and how to avoid them like the plague)? Find out what these 7 common signs are here.
Any woman with intrinsic value knows that she never has to walk out into the dating world with a bunch of entitlements and expectations to a man’s energy and resources.
She just is, valuable!
It is only women who show up with intrinsic mate value who will naturally and completely effortlessly inspire men to fall madly in love with them!
When you have intrinsic mate value as a woman, and you show up as the one and only type of woman, you will find that men put you in what we call the ‘one and only’ basket. Not the basket of ‘one of many’ women.
Here’s a little known secret, woman to woman that I want to share with you:
You want to be nothing less than the one and only woman to men. But to be that way, you have to show up as the one and only! Here are the 5 secrets to have him fall in love with you and BEG you to be his one and only.
Sign number 3: He spends money he doesn’t even have on you
Now, if a man doesn’t do this, it doesn’t always mean that he is not in love with you. This is just a symbol of a man’s willingness to take risks for you, you see.
So, it doesn’t mean he’s not in love with you if he ISN’T spending money he doesn’t have.
He could be taking risks for you in other ways. I mean, every man is different and every man is in a different situation.
But this sign, he spends money he doesn’t even have on you, is along the same lines of risk taking behaviour.
Men & women in love take more risks
Men and women in love both take more risks.
…And men often do it in big ways. But there are other kinds of risks he can take to show he is ready to be vulnerable to you and to sacrifice something to be with you.
It’s kind of like, you will do things you don’t normally do when your brain has been taken over by the chemicals of romantic love.
To quote anthropologists who study the brain in love, it feels like “someone is camping in your head”. You will take risks that you wouldn’t normally be willing to take.
Spending money he doesn’t even have is definitely a risky thing to do.
There’s a disclaimer that goes with this sign though. The money he spends has to be on YOU.
For example, a guy going in to debt to hire a porsche to drive around to pretend he’s really rich, isn’t risking anything for you.
Unless you asked to sit in a porsche. He’s just trying to create an image of wealth for himself.
Examples of this ‘spending money he doesn’t even have’ could be buying you something that you can’t afford but need. It could be buying you something that you’ve been wanting but won’t buy for yourself.
Or it could mean taking you somewhere on a trip, and putting it on his credit card.
(You might also like my article Is It Smart For Women To Look For A Rich Man?)
Does he take any risks for you?
Ask yourself this question…
“Is he risking something for me?” (as opposed to just hanging with you when it’s convenient and when there’s no other options available to him at the time)
“Is he making himself vulnerable to me?” (even if it’s in different ways to how I am vulnerable to him?)
Again, this sign is very specific. If he doesn’t spend money he doesn’t have, it doesn’t mean that you should try to get him to do that. No way! that would just be being a value sucker.
The real message you should take from this unusual sign he is madly in love with you, is ‘he takes risks he wouldn’t usually take, for you. To win you.’
Here’s an article I wrote on the 10 Ultimate Signs of A Healthy Relationship.
Sign number 4: There’s a tenderness when he speaks your name
Use your gut with this one, not your head. This sign is not necessarily something to analyse, it’s more something to feel with your gut.
Is there a sense that he’s more vulnerable than he usually is when he speaks your name? Does he seem to have a sense of emotional attachment to the act of speaking your name?
When he speaks your name, does his voice seem softer and more loving than usual?
Does he say your name differently than he says other people’s names?
When a man is not in love, he’ll never speak your name with a sense of tenderness or vulnerability. Only because the connection and attraction is just not there between you guys.
I don’t want to give you the impression that a man who is falling in love with you will always say your name tenderly.
Sometimes, even if a man is madly in love with you, he’ll have moments along the way where he uses your name in a more detached way. That’s normal.
There will always be these moments in a long term relationship. So this is not some hard and fast rule that he has to say your name tenderly every second of the day.
It’s more about, are there times where he does?
Sign number 5: He will care for the people (& things) you care about
…even if he doesn’t like them himself!
You see, when we are in love, we become less selfish.
Out of these 5 odd signs that he loves you, this one is the most telling. Why? Because out of all the things a man gives to a woman, his emotional energy and emotional commitment are the hardest to give.
If he cares for the people and things that you care about, that means he’s in love. The reason for this is because empathy for our beloved is one of the distinguishing factors of romantic love!
A man who isn’t in love, will not care much. He’ll only do the bare minimum for you. He will still keep you around in his life, but he won’t care that much.
Here’s an article on why he keeps you around if he doesn’t want a relationship.
It’s very hard, if you’re really in love with someone, to not also love and care for the people that they love and care about!
This is why some people don’t seem capable of falling in love. Because they’re just not equipped with the right relational patterns to be vulnerable enough to fall in love.
Some people have been abandoned too many times in their childhood.
(See my article on ways to test if you have abandonment issues or not).
Through these painful experiences, they unfortunately no longer have the innocence and the emotional resources to bond emotionally with another person (in a way that makes them fall madly in love).
Some people also have what we call ‘shiny object syndrome’.
People with shiny object syndrome will find it much harder to fall in love. This is due to the fact that they subconsciously value things and experiences. They don’t value vulnerable, human connection.
They also don’t value loyalty, much less have they ever even thought about it.
If you’re with a man and he says “I don’t care for your best friend Latiesha, she’s a dickhead anyway, I don’t like her, but you can be friends with her”.
Or – “your mother’s a b*tch. I don’t want to hear about her.” Then maybe he’s not madly in love, or just not in love in this moment.
Remember: a man cannot be in love 24/7 in the long term
Remember, this is just a guide. Men are human too.
For example, a man can be sick, bedridden, or so broken down and exhausted that even though he’s madly in love with you, he doesn’t have the energy to care about your friend Latiesha right now.
So, if you want to look for the signs a man is falling in love, look back on these 5 unusual signs. Does he exhibit 3 of these signs or more? If he does, then there’s every chance he is in love with you, and you should be over the moon.
Also, I want to send you a word of caution. It’s always nice to know a man is in love with you, but it’s important not to idealise the concept of a man loving you more than you love him.
Why?
Because this is a recipe for disaster, and it doesn’t allow you true fulfilment in your love life. You can learn more about this topic in my article Is It Wise To Pick A Man Who Loves You More Than You Love Him?
Don’t expect a man to be in love with you every moment of every day
Always remember that research has proven that couples can remain madly in love with their one and only 10, or even 20 years after first beginning their relationship.
And yet, even in these cases, there will be conflicts and hard times in a relationship where in some moments, you’d be silly to expect he felt like he was in love with you.
Actually feeling in love is not physically possible 100% of the time, otherwise nothing would ever get done.
I remember I teased my husband once years ago. I said “yeah you love me but you’re not in love with me.”
And he said “I’m always in love with you.”
As nice as this felt, I don’t take his words too literally.
I trust his words, but at the same time I know I physically cannot expect either of us to be madly in love all the time. I can only know that it comes back and forth to us over time.
The flow of romantic love still comes and goes in our relationship after 14 years together. We keep it alive due to humour, vulnerability, love and lots of novel experiences together (only now we do so with 2 and almost 3 kids in tow!)
Here’s the ultimate truth:
Once a man truly falls in love with a woman, and he forms that rare (sometimes once in a lifetime) deep emotional bond with her, it can be hard to ever change or break that.
(…and just between you and I, I’m always in love with my husband too!)
Here’s what to do if you want men to fall madly in love with you…
By the way, if you want a man to fall madly in love with you, it’s not that hard. It’s about showing up as his ‘one and only’ woman, rather than one of many.
Because unfortunately, in this day and age, it’s very easy for women to get stuck in the ‘one of many’ basket, and it’s just about how you show up.
What you want is to show up as the ‘one and only’ type of woman, and everything will come easily for you from there.
And here’s the GOOD news: I’ve got a whole program on this, titled “Becoming Hid One and Only”. In this program, I will walk you through step-by-step, how to be his one and only. Click here to get your hands on a copy over here.
Share with us your stories and experiences with men in the comments below. I’d love to hear them, and they might just inspire other women!
…Because the best teachers we have are each other.
P.S. If you liked this article, CLICK HERE to check out my full article archives! Or you may greatly benefit from one of our highly popular paid programs, CLICK HERE to see what we offer right now.
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.
I am madly in love with my boyfriend but we hardly get to see each other what should I do? He’s grounded.
Write letters to him. For yourself first and foremost. Whether you give them to him or not is another factor.
I fell truly and madly in love, 100% of the time for my girlfriend! And she says the same We literally cannot stand to be apart and its almost painful but incredible and mind blowing!!! We have had to take a day apart after spending the first 5 together has physically and emotionally exhausted us. I wanted her to have a day to recover because she gives soooooo much to everyone all around her and people can’t see her for what I see but that’s OK because I’ll do my best to give her everything she ever wants and more!!!… Read more »
Well I knew he’s not in love much less to be madly in love or even love. He only drives me here and there very close and then we can talk for hours but he doesn’t put effort into looking after my things or spending on me. The little that he does he makes it look super important and talks about it a lot even if he would have done more for someone who has done less than I did for him. He talks of helping me more and replacing my ex-boyfriends but he’s not done or made plans to… Read more »
Hi Kay, how does he respond when you show your appreciation for the little things?
Okay so since a lot of these comments I’ve read are not really happy comments I’ll leave one. I think I have found a love that consumes us both. I felt this once before. I’ve had about 10 different sex partners in my life but only 2 have I ever felt deep connection for. The first love was in high school well he grew up and ended up using drugs and he was so abusive because of the drugs that I had to leave. I never went down that path thank god. The guy I’m with now it’s been going… Read more »
Thanks so much for sharing your story and leaving a happy comment, Bailey! Isn’t it the best feeling in the world to know you are with your ‘forever’? ?
You really have a friend name latiesha?? Ew
Okay ASHLEY….. Lol
renee ,y boyfriend has recently offered me some financial support for me to pay a refurbish that is necessary in my house. I was embarrassed to accept but I thanked him with al my heart. How can I show him I really appreciated the offer and keep my feminine energy going on?
Renee, on the last section when you mentioned how some people have lost the innocence and emotional resources to fall in love, I was wondering is there a way to get that back? Is it possible to overcome those obstacles and fall in love again? I think it may happened to me. And it makes me really sad because I really do want to be in love again. Or does it not apply to women in the same way? But I have noticed I suddenly got so so selfish and I don’t want to be but it’s almost like it’s… Read more »
Awwww Renee, I’ve been waiting for your reply on mine,on my previous comment, pls do
Hi Renee I’ve always wanted to share this with someone and I guess ure the right person for me….my boyfriend used to love me like crazy and couldn’t stay without me…..ever since I refused him sexually he started drifting away…..sometimes he shows signs that he still loves me and tells me atimes,we share special moments sometimes after that but it seems like his still hurting because I rejected him sexually and I’m definitely not ready for that but he doesn’t want to understand and it’s obvious his hurting so much and punishing me for that by giving me the silent… Read more »
Hi Jane. It’s hard for me to answer you as I don’t know if you have a rule that you cannot have sex before marriage, or that you have just been rejecting him sexually recently.
I’ve just been rejecting him because I have a feeling he’ll disappear after sex and I love him soooo much, he makes up excuses when I ask him for things
Hi Jane. Well, I don’t have a whole lot of information so I will answer you based on the info that I do have. The best thing to do would be to communicate “I am scared.” to him, regarding your fear that he will leave after sex. Rejecting him might feel like the safe reaction for you, but it doesn’t create deeper connection. So, communicate that you are scared whilst being totally connected to him. Hold eye contact, show that you care and you’re not about to pull away love and openness. That way, you avoid taking away access to… Read more »
Thanks alot??
Hi Renee & David, I really need your opinion on this. Everyone else I’ve talked to has more or less asked me to fight fire with fire, and I’m not really that kind of a human. So, my man and I, we’ve been in a relationship for some time now (is almost 3 years long enough?) and he was/is a masculine at his core. So far, however you’ve described a masculine man, he fits that description to a T. I try to understand that he has that drive in him, the ambition to achieve his goals and I understand that… Read more »
Hi Krysti, I’m working on a response to your question. Allow me a little bit of time. ?
Thanks a lot Renee! Deeply appreciated. xx
Hey Krysti! Here’s my answer for you. https://www.thefemininewoman.com/he-stops-chasing-romantic-what-to-do/
Wishing you and your boyfriend all the best.
Okay so I have a question, I’ve read almost every article here and there are some great common sense advice but I have to admit it is difficult being vulnerable and continuing to show that feminine side to a man that is very masculine. Shows emotion in his way and from what I read all pretty normal. So my question is this, doing all of this helps me understand him more and I love that, but in doing this, how do I get him to understand ME more and my feminine side.
Hey Renee, love the article! I wanted to order your dvd but i’ll be goin on a trip soon. how many days does the delivery take to asia? i would love to get it before leaving for my holiday.
Hey Jen! It takes a maximum of two weeks to arrive in Asia. ?
Hi, Renee, I bought your dvd two weeks ago and it hasn’t arrived yet and I tried to talk with your customer service but they told me they didn’t have info about my delivery and that worries me could you help me with my order? Thanks.
Hi Araceli. I’ve spoken to our support desk and I believe they have gotten back to you! Don’t worry, if you don’t get one, we’ll send another. ❤️
Hi Renee, There is something I so desperately wanted to ask you, How damaging is “nagging” in a relationship? I mean it certainly can’t be very feminine but I just don’t seem to have a filter on my emotions and I just can’t stop saying things (ie. nagging) to my man to get him to do stuff. It wasn’t the case earlier because of the honeymoon period of the relationship, because he would put in a lot of effort to impress me. Now, complacency has set in and I honestly can’t get a grip over how much I seem to… Read more »
Oh Alyssa. Sounds very stressful. How can you stop nagging? How can you feel like yourself again? How can you save your relationship? 3 main suggestions I have for you with the information I have. 1: Discard the rules about needing to be feminine, because it’s not useful to you here (and I know that might be hard for you because you have this rule that you need to get back to the masculine/feminine polarity), but you need to get rid of the rules, as the rules aren’t serving your relationship, and especially not you right now, because they are… Read more »
I might add that when you ask his goals, look in his eyes and sincerely ask how he plans to achieve them then ask what you can do to help him achieve them. Make it about you and him over coming.
Hey Renee, I would say that this list is spot on, because my boyfriend USED to be like that with me. We’ve been together for almost 3 years and I gotta be honest with you, these past few months it does seem like he has stopped caring, well ,not entirely but I can definitely see the difference. I wish I could figure out what’s wrong.. Is it just how relationships end up being or have I been doing something wrong? I admit, I haven’t really felt “feminine” in a while and my life is so full of stress at the… Read more »
Hi Amy. I wouldn’t focus your thoughts and energy on whether you have been doing something “wrong”, because you haven’t. Don’t fret, if you’ve been together almost 3 years, then these stages are bound to happen. And yes, you’re right, your stress and his stress can definitely get in the way. No couple who are ‘madly in love’ are immune to the changing circumstances and uncontrollable events of life. If you didn’t have these challenges, something would be very wrong. So, maybe it’s not so much about being in love or wanting him to be more in love as it… Read more »
Thank you Renee?
You’re welcome, Pooja. I hope you got my response to your question for the Live Q & A!
This made me feel so happy because my fiance loves me in these 5 ways…ive been so blessed by his love. Ladies, there are still terrific men out here…dont settle ❤
Hi Renee, great article, thanks. And it clarifies things a lot for me. I’ve dated guys who had no interest in solving my problems, or who didn’t want to really bother helping much even with little things so that’s how I knew they weren’t serious about me.
Amazing!