It turns out that there are some clear signs a man is falling in love. Signs that are unusual, but will tell you (as clear as day) that yes, this man is most definitely, undeniably in love with you.
These 5 unusual signs are what I’m going to share with you in this article.
But before we start on that, let me share with you 3 important principles about a man in love…
- A man in love with you will move mountains for you.
- Never lose hope that he is out there, because there is a man out there who will love you that much.
- You can inspire almost any man to love you this much through putting the connection and attraction first.
You can watch my video on the 5 unusual signs a man is falling in love with you…
(If your man does these things he’s madly in love with you!)
It is possible to inspire a man to fall madly in love with you!
Any woman who has a man madly in love with her has knowingly or unknowingly inspired that love from him.
And she has inspired that love from him through the basic principles that create emotional attraction and emotional connection.
Principles that foster mutual vulnerability, emotional depth and everlasting romantic love.
Everlasting?! Yes, the hormones of romantic love, ie: dopamine and norepinephrine do wear off over time.
Yet, research has shown time and again that it is more than possible to keep the spark of romantic love and romantic attraction alive through a lifetime together!
These simple principles of inspiring a man to fall in love, and keeping the romantic love alive are accessible to any woman. No matter her background, age, looks, or social status.
So as you read this, always remember that you have the power within you to inspire any man to love you this much.
I’ve seen plenty of women do this by using the resources that they had forgotten already exists inside of them.
Now let’s find out all about the weird signs he’s falling for you.
Sign number 1: He tries to find solutions to every problem you have,
…even the problems that you thought were impossible to solve!
A man in love can suddenly become outstandingly resourceful in ways that he’s never been before. And he just cares more to give to you!
As you would probably already know, men generally love to solve problems and feel successful at solving problems. Yet, at the same time, solving your problem takes energy, and a lot of energy at that.
As such, this is one of the most certain signs a man is falling in love. It is that probably at least 70% of the time in which you have a problem, he will want to, and work to, solve that problem for you.
He’ll especially want to solve the ones that seemingly, no one else can solve for you.
So the next time you find yourself wondering how does a man act when he’s falling in love with you – think about this:
A man who is really in love with you will not even think twice about spending a lot of physical and emotional energy on you.
Contrast that with a man who isn’t in love and just wants casual sex. And that’s why this is one of the signs that a man is falling in love with you.
This wanting to solve your problem reminds me of the movie “The Box”, with Cameron Diaz and James Marsden in it.
It wasn’t the main point of the movie, but in the movie, his wife had a problem with her leg that caused her to limp. Her husband was so admirably trying to make or provide a prosthetic leg for her.
It is just a critical sign of a man who is in love with a woman. He becomes extra resourceful and willing to solve your problems.
Sign number 2: He tries to provide more & better than your ex boyfriend(s) did
When a man has fallen in love with you, that actually means he has developed a powerful emotional connection with you over time.
And as such, he might eventually come to feel like providing for you is his ‘purpose’.
This doesn’t mean that he can’t have another purpose outside of you, of course. Ideally, he would have another purpose or mission as a strong masculine man.
But providing for you is definitely a part of that purpose. That purpose moves him emotionally. Because you are something precious that he wants to hold onto.
A man who isn’t in love (but is perhaps casually involved with a woman), would never feel a deep purpose or calling to provide for her.
A man who is just with a woman out of convenience, might provide at least a little something for her. Whether that be a little bit of help solving problems around the house, or giving her some cash here and there.
However, he’ll never provide more than enough to just keep you around.
He will also often give a woman crumbs. A man in love would never just give you crumbs!
Remember that distinction. To understand more about this critical distinction, read this article about the women men commit to versus the women men leave.
And yet, a man who is falling madly in love with you will be different. He wouldn’t just want something casual with you, because you are just too precious to him!
If he is falling in love, a man will specifically even want to provide more than anyone else has for you in the past. It’s a wonderful feeling for a woman.
If he’s giving you crumbs, that’s a sign that he is not falling in love
If you feel like a man is giving you crumbs, that could be a sign that he’s not in love.
So now is the time to ask yourself:
‘Is it worth my time and energy investing in a man who is not nearly as invested in me?’
And another question:
‘What price do I really put on my time?’
(I’ll give you a hint: maybe you don’t put a high enough price on your time!’)
You see, for men, they inherently feel the need to prove themselves resourceful and worthy of keeping a high value woman.
He wants to keep her love (and her reproductive resources) all to himself.
Here are some examples of the way men have to prove themselves worthy of a high value woman who is worth keeping.
Men need to have confidence, resourcefulness, ambition, emotional stability, to earn enough money, etc.
And this is especially true when a man is madly in love with you. He will want to provide you with more, and better than you ever had.
Even if he physically can’t provide in the near future. It’s the desire and the effort he puts in to do so.
You may not see the fruits of his effort immediately, but he will want to see you provided for, better than you have ever been before.
And that is to provide for you emotionally, financially, and spiritually. Money is not the only thing a man can ‘provide’.
It is low value to feel entitled to a man’s resources
One thing to always remember:
We cannot just feel entitled to a man treating us like this.
Feeling entitled to a man treating us this way is not the way to raise your value.
In fact, as a woman, having an entitled value-sucking mentality is one way to show up low value.
(By the way, do you know the 7 common signs a woman is low value in the eyes of men (and how to avoid them like the plague)? Find out what these 7 common signs are here.
Any woman with intrinsic value knows that she never has to walk out into the dating world with a bunch of entitlements and expectations to a man’s energy and resources.
She just is, valuable!
It is only women who show up with intrinsic mate value who will naturally and completely effortlessly inspire men to fall madly in love with them!
When you have intrinsic mate value as a woman, and you show up as the one and only type of woman, you will find that men put you in what we call the ‘one and only’ basket. Not the basket of ‘one of many’ women.
Here’s a little known secret, woman to woman that I want to share with you:
You want to be nothing less than the one and only woman to men. But to be that way, you have to show up as the one and only! Here are the 5 secrets to have him fall in love with you and BEG you to be his one and only.
Sign number 3: He spends money he doesn’t even have on you
Now, if a man doesn’t do this, it doesn’t always mean that he is not in love with you. This is just a symbol of a man’s willingness to take risks for you, you see.
So, it doesn’t mean he’s not in love with you if he ISN’T spending money he doesn’t have.
He could be taking risks for you in other ways. I mean, every man is different and every man is in a different situation.
But this sign, he spends money he doesn’t even have on you, is along the same lines of risk taking behaviour.
Men & women in love take more risks
Men and women in love both take more risks.
…And men often do it in big ways. But there are other kinds of risks he can take to show he is ready to be vulnerable to you and to sacrifice something to be with you.
It’s kind of like, you will do things you don’t normally do when your brain has been taken over by the chemicals of romantic love.
To quote anthropologists who study the brain in love, it feels like “someone is camping in your head”. You will take risks that you wouldn’t normally be willing to take.
Spending money he doesn’t even have is definitely a risky thing to do.
There’s a disclaimer that goes with this sign though. The money he spends has to be on YOU.
For example, a guy going in to debt to hire a porsche to drive around to pretend he’s really rich, isn’t risking anything for you.
Unless you asked to sit in a porsche. He’s just trying to create an image of wealth for himself.
Examples of this ‘spending money he doesn’t even have’ could be buying you something that you can’t afford but need. It could be buying you something that you’ve been wanting but won’t buy for yourself.
Or it could mean taking you somewhere on a trip, and putting it on his credit card.
(You might also like my article Is It Smart For Women To Look For A Rich Man?)
Does he take any risks for you?
Ask yourself this question…
“Is he risking something for me?” (as opposed to just hanging with you when it’s convenient and when there’s no other options available to him at the time)
“Is he making himself vulnerable to me?” (even if it’s in different ways to how I am vulnerable to him?)
Again, this sign is very specific. If he doesn’t spend money he doesn’t have, it doesn’t mean that you should try to get him to do that. No way! that would just be being a value sucker.
The real message you should take from this unusual sign he is madly in love with you, is ‘he takes risks he wouldn’t usually take, for you. To win you.’
Here’s an article I wrote on the 10 Ultimate Signs of A Healthy Relationship.
Sign number 4: There’s a tenderness when he speaks your name
Use your gut with this one, not your head. This sign is not necessarily something to analyse, it’s more something to feel with your gut.
Is there a sense that he’s more vulnerable than he usually is when he speaks your name? Does he seem to have a sense of emotional attachment to the act of speaking your name?
When he speaks your name, does his voice seem softer and more loving than usual?
Does he say your name differently than he says other people’s names?
When a man is not in love, he’ll never speak your name with a sense of tenderness or vulnerability. Only because the connection and attraction is just not there between you guys.
I don’t want to give you the impression that a man who is falling in love with you will always say your name tenderly.
Sometimes, even if a man is madly in love with you, he’ll have moments along the way where he uses your name in a more detached way. That’s normal.
There will always be these moments in a long term relationship. So this is not some hard and fast rule that he has to say your name tenderly every second of the day.
It’s more about, are there times where he does?
Sign number 5: He will care for the people (& things) you care about
…even if he doesn’t like them himself!
You see, when we are in love, we become less selfish.
Out of these 5 odd signs that he loves you, this one is the most telling. Why? Because out of all the things a man gives to a woman, his emotional energy and emotional commitment are the hardest to give.
If he cares for the people and things that you care about, that means he’s in love. The reason for this is because empathy for our beloved is one of the distinguishing factors of romantic love!
A man who isn’t in love, will not care much. He’ll only do the bare minimum for you. He will still keep you around in his life, but he won’t care that much.
Here’s an article on why he keeps you around if he doesn’t want a relationship.
It’s very hard, if you’re really in love with someone, to not also love and care for the people that they love and care about!
This is why some people don’t seem capable of falling in love. Because they’re just not equipped with the right relational patterns to be vulnerable enough to fall in love.
Some people have been abandoned too many times in their childhood.
(See my article on ways to test if you have abandonment issues or not).
Through these painful experiences, they unfortunately no longer have the innocence and the emotional resources to bond emotionally with another person (in a way that makes them fall madly in love).
Some people also have what we call ‘shiny object syndrome’.
People with shiny object syndrome will find it much harder to fall in love. This is due to the fact that they subconsciously value things and experiences. They don’t value vulnerable, human connection.
They also don’t value loyalty, much less have they ever even thought about it.
If you’re with a man and he says “I don’t care for your best friend Latiesha, she’s a dickhead anyway, I don’t like her, but you can be friends with her”.
Or – “your mother’s a b*tch. I don’t want to hear about her.” Then maybe he’s not madly in love, or just not in love in this moment.
Remember: a man cannot be in love 24/7 in the long term
Remember, this is just a guide. Men are human too.
For example, a man can be sick, bedridden, or so broken down and exhausted that even though he’s madly in love with you, he doesn’t have the energy to care about your friend Latiesha right now.
So, if you want to look for the signs a man is falling in love, look back on these 5 unusual signs. Does he exhibit 3 of these signs or more? If he does, then there’s every chance he is in love with you, and you should be over the moon.
Also, I want to send you a word of caution. It’s always nice to know a man is in love with you, but it’s important not to idealise the concept of a man loving you more than you love him.
Because this is a recipe for disaster, and it doesn’t allow you true fulfilment in your love life. You can learn more about this topic in my article Is It Wise To Pick A Man Who Loves You More Than You Love Him?
Don’t expect a man to be in love with you every moment of every day
Always remember that research has proven that couples can remain madly in love with their one and only 10, or even 20 years after first beginning their relationship.
And yet, even in these cases, there will be conflicts and hard times in a relationship where in some moments, you’d be silly to expect he felt like he was in love with you.
Actually feeling in love is not physically possible 100% of the time, otherwise nothing would ever get done.
I remember I teased my husband once years ago. I said “yeah you love me but you’re not in love with me.”
And he said “I’m always in love with you.”
As nice as this felt, I don’t take his words too literally.
I trust his words, but at the same time I know I physically cannot expect either of us to be madly in love all the time. I can only know that it comes back and forth to us over time.
The flow of romantic love still comes and goes in our relationship after 14 years together. We keep it alive due to humour, vulnerability, love and lots of novel experiences together (only now we do so with 2 and almost 3 kids in tow!)
Here’s the ultimate truth:
Once a man truly falls in love with a woman, and he forms that rare (sometimes once in a lifetime) deep emotional bond with her, it can be hard to ever change or break that.
(…and just between you and I, I’m always in love with my husband too!)
Here’s what to do if you want men to fall madly in love with you…
By the way, if you want a man to fall madly in love with you, it’s not that hard. It’s about showing up as his ‘one and only’ woman, rather than one of many.
Because unfortunately, in this day and age, it’s very easy for women to get stuck in the ‘one of many’ basket, and it’s just about how you show up.
What you want is to show up as the ‘one and only’ type of woman, and everything will come easily for you from there.
And here’s the GOOD news: I’ve got a whole program on this, titled “Becoming Hid One and Only”. In this program, I will walk you through step-by-step, how to be his one and only. Click here to get your hands on a copy over here.
Share with us your stories and experiences with men in the comments below. I’d love to hear them, and they might just inspire other women!
…Because the best teachers we have are each other.
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
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