A more physically ‘perfect’ or glamorous woman needn’t always cause jealousy amongst other women, but a beautiful, feminine woman can cause enormous jealousy.

If you’ve always been a beautiful and feminine woman, you would have experienced countless jealous looks and perhaps even jealous schemes, engineered by other women. It’s everywhere. And you can be a plain Jane and cause this jealous stir among other women, because you have something other women feel they do not; the amazing and mysterious force of femininity.

And, jealous women can be women on the street whom you don’t know, or even a jealous friend or jealous friends, in the form of ‘frenemies’ – friends who sometimes seem like a friend, and other times seem to want the worst for you. (Click here to take the quiz on “How Naturally Feminine Am I Actually?”)

Good looks do not keep a man. Every woman knows this deep down. And a physically gorgeous woman; even a famous woman crowned the most beautiful woman in the world, cannot have it all. Take Halle Berry for example, having been cheated on or left by every man she’s been with. Take Marilyn Monroe, who died way before she should have. Take Elle Macpherson, who in her 40s still has gorgeous looks, and yet she hasn’t held or kept a man. Take for example the large number of famous women who have committed suicide or died of some sort of drug overdose. No amount of beautiful looks or fame will fulfill a woman. You can be the most beautiful woman on earth, and still feel unloved.

But when a woman is truly feminine, she tends to never ever be short of men in her life if she’s single, or if she’s taken, she may find it hard to fight off her man’s adoring, admiring affections even if she wanted to. 🙂

Jealousy on Fire

More often than not, a loving, devoted and amazing man in another woman’s life will cause jealousy on fire in some other women.

More often than not, even if a feminine woman is single, other women will hate her, for no reason other than the fact that this woman has something that they feel is out of reach for them; true, radiant femininity and consequently, beauty! Which is the ultimate attractor of masculinity. Every woman can achieve true femininity, but not every woman does. In fact, women who are jealous are often not even really aware of what this other woman has that she doesn’t. All she knows is that she wants what she’s got, deep down.

Feminine women attract male attention. Feminine women can have the pick of the bunch, and yes, feminine women CAN have it all. Because true femininity is radiant and gives love. It is love and it is a force for life. Feminine energy is adored by men who are masculine at their core (most men), and regardless of her looks, a woman like this may still get the pick of the bunch.

Throughout the course of your life, (if you follow the femininity movement and embrace your feminine sexual core), you will most definitely encounter a trail of hateful and angry women. Regardless of your age. Jealousy isn’t just incited in other women only when you’re young and beautiful. It occurs simply if you are beautiful. And femininity is beautiful. Men will jump hoops to protect it, love it, embrace it and chase it.

Jealous women may just give you a nasty look, a hateful sideways glance, and if you’re lucky, they may bitch about you behind your back. If you’re unlucky, jealous women will go out of their way to bring you down.

And in this heavily masculine ambition driven society, there are plenty of them. Because women suppress their feminine energy to get things done, and to conform. So they don’t often get what they truly want to experience. Which is love.

Ultimately, we’re all looking for a feeling, and more often than not, most women want to fill up with love and to give love. Masculine women don’t tend to attract this in to their lives. So if you are feminine, you’ll have something that they feel they are missing out on, yet don’t quite know what it is or how to achieve it.

And life is unfair to start with. So we don’t all have the same opportunities. We’re not all born with stunning looks, and we’re not all given the requisite knowledge to live happy, fulfilling lives and to enjoy enriching and fulfilling intimate relationships and marriages.

Now if you’re a very feminine woman, you will most likely not feel a great deal of jealousy if you see another beautiful woman who is truly happy. In fact, you’ll most likely be really happy for her and want to revel in this happiness with her. Even if you do not have it yourself! This may be because you feel you too, can have what she has.

You are a rare creature 🙂 not all women can revel in the good fortune of another woman.

If you are the kind of woman who feels guilty being in the spotlight, and although you feel and enjoy being feminine, find it hard to fully enjoy it without feeling bad about taking away the spotlight from other women.

Never dull your femininity to make other women feel like they are enough.

There’s a reason why anti-feminists often say that it is unattractive women who instigated the first and subsequent waves of feminist movements. (please note: I don’t know how accurately researched this video is, and I am aware that it is not necessarily true that it is solely unattractive women who instigate and support Feminist movements). However, I understand their position and can see why they perceive this to be the truth.

And unattractive is not purely physical. I believe a woman can actually change her looks and become uglier on the outside through her internal thought processes.

One way in which you can deal with jealousy is by befriending the jealous woman and lead her to feel more confident in herself, and being more giving to her. Giving her reasons to feel loved and accepted. That will bring out a different side to her. And, you can show other women who are less confident that they can have, and deserve to have everything that they want and need. However, there are times when women just don’t want to change or feel truly great about themselves. In these cases, you’ve just got to do some serious ‘pattern-breaking’; breaking of their patterns/habits! 🙂

How to deal with jealous women

If you find yourself in a situation in which you are surrounded by oppressive women who you can sense are not only talking about you behind your back, but actively do things behind your back to bring you down, it’s time to take action. Because you cannot let women like this walk all over you. A woman still has to be able to put her foot down when it is needed. (read my article about passive, aggressive and difficult women)

You may believe that a feminine woman should just stay quiet and perhaps just sacrifice her own needs to avoid being around these women. Not true.

I have said before that a feminine woman needs to have a masculine part to her as well; and this is a situation in which you need to go in to more masculine mode to stand up to women like this.

A story

I’ll give you an example. In my own life, I’ve experienced being in a workplace full of women several times. This time last year I was working as a perfume ambassador. Whilst in some places, women in this type of occupation would be quite feminine (and there were a couple where I worked), there were a few very masculine and butch women. (Click here to take the quiz “How High Value High Status Am I on Facebook?”)

On my first day, I encountered a young woman who also worked as a perfume ambassador, just for a different agent. I adore people, so I cheerfully introduced myself and intended to make a friend. Before I noticed the energy she was putting out. She had no interest in befriending me, in fact she immediately asserted herself as a manager, but made her position sound higher than what it really was. Because I was new there, I was easy to fool.

We shall call her ‘B’.

Immediately, B was asserting herself upon me and I was following her commands, although I actually wasn’t obligated to follower her commands. But she was still very oppressive, and I made the mistake of getting stuck in a ‘master-servant’ type role with her, which was very uncomfortable.

B’s intentions showed up more when I needed her expertise to guide me to where to find items, where other products were located, etc. She would never be concise and accurate. She was always deliberately vague, so much so that I had no idea where she was pointing me to. She wanted me to keep asking her, and ultimately, look foolish. I unfortunately let myself fall in to this role with her repeatedly.

She also knew I was never taught to use a register, and that it wasn’t a part of my job to be able to use one; yet she would tell me to put things through the register in front of a customer, and walk away without offering assistance.

During these incidents, I had to ask her repeatedly for directions and she would roll her eyes at me when I couldn’t follow her instructions. I kept on with this situation because I didn’t really want to believe that she could be so deliberately manipulative.

I noticed also, that her behavior got worse when my man came to visit me at work. He did this often, and was always very affectionate, protective and loving. He often picked me up from my shifts. Sometimes he would bring me a drink or food for my lunch break, and other times he just came briefly, to see how I was. I began to sense that every time he did come to see me, she would pull another woman aside, and talk about me and point at myself and David.

Over time, I noticed that the other women who I thought I had made friends with stopped wanting to talk to me. I felt left out and excluded. I ended up in tears in the ladies’ room, and found it hard to work. I found it hard to push on in this environment, and the energy was very bad.

One day her and another colleague were talking, and she confessed that she had never been on a date (she is 24, nearly 25) or had a man interested in her. I felt bad for ‘B’, and thus continued indicating that I was still open to her, and open to befriending her in some way, as I am with most people.

Until one day I met another colleague from a different department who told me how she was in tears one day after work because of the way ‘B’ had been treating her. I was forced to acknowledge that ‘B’ was preying on seemingly ‘weaker’ and softer women, who were more feminine, and more vulnerable, as this new colleague I met was very feminine.

And this is the trouble with being a very feminine woman. Whilst the majority of men will love you for it, and not want to hurt you in any way, there will be women who will want to put you down. Women, I find, tend to be different around other very feminine women. I’ve met women who love this and feel at home with other feminine women, but I’ve also come across women who smell femininity from a mile away and proceed to trample all over it. I personally love women, and celebrate femininity.

You’re probably wondering how I ended up dealing with ‘B’. One morning, I noticed that one woman whom had always been nice to me stopped talking to me completely and starting being very snarky. I had a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with B. So I took the liberty of confronting my friend and asked. Indeed, B had told her, among other things, a blatant lie about me.

So I went up to B and confronted her in front of every employee, stating to her that she shall come to me from now on, to tell things to my face, rather than telling fibs behind my back. I proceeded to ask her why she was doing it, and I hadn’t seen myself cause fear in another woman for a long time, but I had to do it to liberate myself and to show her that I wasn’t going to tolerate her behavior.

The point of my story is to show that there are scenarios in which a feminine woman must assert herself and go in to more of a masculine mode. It’s all part of being a dynamic and whole woman who is able to bring out different sides of herself when it is needed. (read my article about light and dark feminine)

You need to raise your level of masculinity, become even more masculine than them, to bring things back to a little more fairness.

When confronted with jealous women, or even other aggressive women who disrespect you or your womanliness, it is important to stand your ground, rather than shy away from it. I learned this lesson, as I let the situation go on a lot longer than I should have!

Bring out the goddess in you, download your “Goddess Report”.

Do you have any strategies to deal with jealousy from other women? Or do you have any juicy stories? Feel free to share with us 😀



  • Shiva

    Thank you for this article and I also appreciate all the other women’s comments. I had been looking for something like this for a while online because when I brought this topic up, people would look at me like they had no idea what I was talking about, including female friends. I felt alone until I read this. I am 40 and I have dealt with jealous women’s passive aggressive and sometimes aggressive attacks on me in all sorts of forms (from strangers to acquaintances to colleagues) since my 20s. They would get jealous if they thought I was prettier or smarter than them, or the shorter ones who had issues with their heights attacked because I am tall… or if I walked confidently down the street smiling, young women would try to walk into me or block me physically, out of their insecurities… just on and on. It caused a lot of stress for me and sometimes isolated me, especially if someone was spreading false rumors about me and enacting relational aggression. Thoughts about how to defend myself– whether I should say something or not, whether I should be polite or nasty back– kept running in my head, stressing me out. I sometimes thought I should look dumpy or not walk straight and confident to avoid attack. But I am learning that their problem is theirs and I should continue to glow and be myself no matter how often they attack. I am so glad other women know what I am talking about and have gone through it, because it makes me feel like I finally have a community that understands. And after reading others’ comments, I feel like any response we have at the time of a jealous woman’s attack is ok… whether we ignore the person, fight back, or whatever else… we are trying our best each moment in the face of severely insecure women. Now I just calmly say “insecure” and keep going when one of them tries to walk into me or block me. I always tell myself, the problem is theirs and I will make it through– but they have to live and sleep with their insecurities and self-hatred. That for me is their karma. Thank you so much everyone for understanding and for sharing.

  • Lisle Von Rhoman


  • Lisle Von Rhoman

    Where did my comments go?

  • Lisle Von Rhoman

    Seeing that my comment appeared, I will keep this tab open and amaze you with stories much like your own. Not one upping here but I’ve got some doozies. Many similar but many with a higher degree of sickness. I’m the most kindest person I know besides my sister. I come from a land in which kindness and hospitality are our claim to fame.

    Reading the comments here have overwhelmed me with feelings of warmth and compassion for the victims. Many actually caused me chills of fear as the buried abuses of my own came to light.

    I just have one issue here with the site owner’s perception. Just one…and I haven’t seen it mentioned throughout my pouring over each comment. So grateful for this blog.

    This has nothing to do with current gender politics as I’ve figured this out years ago. Femininity/Masculinity or a hybrid of both.

    I’ve fell victim to two kinds of envious women and even effeminate gay men. So there’s three types with their own agenda. Maybe four if you add in male and female closet homosexuals.

    I’ve found that feminine woman find me a threat as a superior type of woman with qualities they wished they owned. But then there were the tomboyish/butch girls and women who were secretly attracted to me. They could be 5 years old or 60 years old. They were playing out the torture young boys feel when they’re attracted to a girl. Male homosexuals fall into the former category of vying for straight men they secretly coveted themselves.

    Being the ideal infant, child, teen then adult who possesses a dichotomy of masculine and feminine traits is a societal death sentence. Straight men go crazy for this kind of woman. Proudly displaying their human prop, dead ringer for Grace Kelly with such elegance and fine bone structure as a wedding date. Ultimate refinement. Yet she’s educated, plays multiple instruments and jumps out of airplanes for excitement. She’ll make her own bed frame, fix a leaky roof and will rescue any animal in need. Spent a lot of time with Dad and boy was Mom jealous and bitter. But Mom couldn’t stop her once she was free of her inferiority complex and clutches of her own daughter. Resented my world travel, all on my own dime. Frugal and investment wise.

    Female friends? Yeah, right. Fake friends trying to take me down. My own childhood friend whose parents live across the street is calling the town code enforcer over things nobody in this neighbor hood would dream of bitching about. She stops by to visit her parents on occasion and looks for anything to bring me down. The town inspector found me in a back brace and knew the deal. Lots of cats running around. Three lost feral cats who have lived here 10 years and the neighbors love them. Yet if you roll by her home, you’ll see its a carbon copy of my fine Kyoto design just done poorly because she’s never been, no less lived on Japan. All the neighbors take my lead. This woman is 50 f’ing years old! This just happened last week. It never ends. I’m so sorry I was born better than you. Must I still be punished for superior genetics? That’s my crime, huh.

    Stay tuned because I have stories from my past that will make your toes curl. As far as employment, envious women might as well be stealing food off of my table. I could be a quadriplegic in a wheelchair and they’ll still envy me for something.

    Stay with me.

  • Lisle Von Rhoman

    Just checking if these comments are still viable because they’ve been around for awhile. That avatar photo is not me. It’s a reminder of an absolute nutcase I photographed at a Christmas party two years ago. I was 48, she was 52. It’s a constant reminder that age does not cure insecure women of envying a better woman cut from a finer cloth.

  • Dangerous Chicken

    I understand you completely. I have been going through this most my adult life and it doesn’t get better, but you become stronger. My two sisters (I’m the middle) are complete witches to me and have been since childhood. Its become so bad that I fear they’d kill me if they could, maybe shove me off a cliff or poison me. I’m now learning that I must stay away from them and its sad. They hate when I wear makeup or dress up which is always, because I enjoy makeup and feminine things. My youngest sis becomes the exorcist when she sees a guy turn to look at me, lol not kidding! This will send her raging for months and she makes me pay by being short with me, making cruel jabs, disagreeing with everything I say, oh and commenting of my age being that I’m only 3 years older than she. She tries to make me feel like I’m 100!. Whatever she can do to hurt me she will. She’s emotionally abusive a

  • Anna C

    This article is an oldie but goodie! Thanks Renee! If a woman wants to put another woman down, even subconsciously, that is competitive behavior, and that is masculine. You’re right in recommending a more masculine approach!

    I was thinking of 2 types of women: The insecure types who are desperate to find men, and the secure types who enjoy life and are open and authentic to everyone. The insecure types put out such bad energy, and are usually the ones that need to be healed but they are the most dangerous. Hurt people hurt people, right? I’ve found in my experience that the insecure types usually are not in a loving relationship, and thus, I stay away and distrust those types. Then there are the secure types who are most often in a loving relationship (some are single too) whom I can connect with “securely.” Until a woman becomes secure enough in herself, it will be hard to find a lasting relationship, because there will be a lack that the man is expected to fill. These are the types most likely to be the “jealous competitive” types you explain above.

    It’s tough to avoid them. I wish I knew a woman like you where I worked! I’d love to be friends with a higher value woman who is authentic and above all this competitiveness and jealousy.

    Thanks for the article! 🙂

  • sugarnspicelass

    I am going through this myself with a few women I work with. The place I work is about 99% females (which we know brings this out more when there are so many women together). I approach my job as someone who does all I can to help and support my co-workers, working hard, and doing what I think is right. Despite this (or maybe because of this?), I work with a few women who think I’m a good target for criticism, petty remarks, badmouthing behind my back, and scapegoating.

    Being naturally feminine, I have always been a sensitive girl, who underneath it all tries to show kindness to others and prefers to get along with everyone (if possible). Logically I know not everyone is going to like me, and I’ve come to accept that more as I’ve gotten older (when I was a little girl it crushed me when someone was mean to me or didn’t like me). Now I know it is a part of life, not everyone is gonna like you, but there’s still a little part of me that feels a little hurt when women are unkind to me or don’t like me.

    Lucky for me, I do have several co-workers who are good friends who stand beside me, other feminine women who are confident in themselves and whose default setting is to show kindness toward others. That helps a lot in getting through those incidents.

    Needless to say it just makes work so much more stressful, when nothing you do is good enough, when co-workers (whom you try to help in any way you can) talk about you behind your back, and try to scapegoat you. I really didn’t understand why grown women can’t be counted on to be professional and mature, but instead act like little Mean Girls who never grew up. One who used to act this way stopped after years of “killing her with kindness” but unfortunately there are still some who still behave this way. But reading this really helped me get perspective Renee. It has also helped me to not take it as personally and in a weird way view it as a compliment. Thank you for writing this!

  • Goodall Lesley

    Just returned from France. The women seemed to be worse there. Still I have read there is no true love there and their main hobby and conversation is sex.

  • Serene Meadow

    I have always been very feminine, and have experienced my share of such behavior. It’s so sad and ridiculous. I don’t want to be competitive, only happy.

  • Beentheredonethat

    The only way to avoid it is to find the company of women with similar traits and muturity level or otherwise more mature in their outlook. Insecure women will hate you for anything they percieve as lacking in themselves (intelligence, youth, beauty, God help you if you have all 3), especially if you aren’t constantly trying to play it down and instead are holding your own with the guys at work instead of being the dumb bimbo they can laugh at making them look bad. Such women have no interest in excellence an collaboration, they’re toxic across the board amd wherever they go trouble follows.

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