I’d like to say that there are reasons you shouldn’t feel threatened by other women. I’s also like to say that there are reasons why you should not compare yourself to other women.
I’d also like to say that there are a bunch of reasons why you are in fact, better than that woman ‘over there’ because of such and such a reason.
But you already do that, right? That’s what humans do.
When we see some other woman has something we think we don’t have or can’t have….we try to justify why we don’t need that thing that the other woman has. Or we try to focus on what WE have that’s better.
“Oh she’s young and good looking…but she’s dumb.”
That would always do a great job of making you feel better about yourself, wouldn’t it?
Nope. It’s an awful way of dealing with things.
How To Stop Being Insecure About Other Woman? Don’t Do THIS
See, just by thinking “she’s a dumb person so NOW I get to give myself permission to feel better about what I think I don’t have…”
That’s such a flimsy way to build a sense of certainty and confidence within yourself, because many things you think other women are, are things that you could very well be, but don’t even see that truth yet.
We’ve all betrayed ourselves like this before.
Instead of building up our own intrinsic mate value, we think we’re denying some other woman something by thinking less of her and more of ourselves. But the truth is that we’re denying it from ourselves.
Don’t do this! Instead of retreating into yourself to justify why she is “not that great”, invest in your own intrinsic value as a woman.
Wondering what intrinsic value is? Read my article on How To Be A High Value Woman: 3 Traits To Avoid.
Ever noticed that when you feel threatened by other females and you secretly denigrate her, it becomes the same old vicious cycle? It literally eats you alive!
You start the same cycle of comparison and self-justification tomorrow. Next year. Next decade. And hopefully not…until the day you die.
Of course, there ARE reasons why you COULD feel better than another woman at something. You can always find those. But what you CAN’T always find (unless you make the choice to be smarter)….is the freedom to let go of that – to let go of the need to treat fear as your friend.
For me these days, what causes me more pain, is seeing other women get caught up feeling not as good as other women.
Because I used to be there, and I HATED it. I hated not feeling good enough and I hated feeling helpless because another woman’s hair or boobs or legs were better than mine.
Nowadays, I have a different focus…I’m at a point where I don’t care nearly as much about other women being prettier than me or being better than me.
Because I’ve finally learned to accept that in doing this, I’m OPENLY accepting suffering into my life.
I’m literally opening my arms to fear and saying: ‘take hold of me! Make me a miserable bitch who can’t be friends with other women because I’m so small and so closed and so fearful.’
The Illusion that another woman has more than You…
See… the illusion is that you feel bad because some other women have more than you or are prettier than you. That’s the ILLUSION.
But there’s a cruel concept to keep focusing on. All it accomplishes is keeping you mildly entertained. And that’s…. miserably entertained. It’s not a good kind of entertainment.
You don’t feel bad when other women seem to be more than You
You feel bad because you accept the idea that you are actually more deserving of love when you look a certain way, act a certain way, or achieve a certain something.
If you’d like to understand this topic deeper, read my article: He Said Another Woman Is More Attractive Than Me. How Do I Cope? [A Guide].
You also feel even worse than bad because you unconsciously accepted the idea that you CAN’T experience LOVE.
And what a disaster that is…because feminine human beings just want to experience love. And exist as love.
Masculine energy is all about feeling freedom from constraint. Feminine energy has to exist as love in order to fully live and be truly happy, not just excited or momentarily on a high.
So what you’re doing when you compare yourself to other women and proceed to feel bad about yourself (and hate her), is you’re deny yourself the opportunity to experience love. You lie to yourself.
Because it’s not that you can never show up like her, or have her positive attributes. You can!
And it’s not that being prettier or skinnier would make you more likely to inspire men to feel emotional attraction and emotional connection for you.
It’s quite the opposite. In fact, it’s not the prettier women who experience more love and devotion from men.
It’s the women who have the skills to build emotional connection and emotional attraction with men. Because these are the only two things that matter to get men to fall in love with you and stay with you!
Do Prettier women have it better?
You think prettier women have it better. Or you think that more successful women have more exciting lives.
You think that skinny women get more male attention (damn those horrible bitches!)
You think younger women are always more attractive than you.
But that’s what YOU think in your fearful state. And it’s wrong.
It’s the silly cruel voice in your mind waving her red flag saying: ‘it’s time to let your fears take over your life now!’
And you are playing to this cruel game with her (or him), willingly. You sit there actively succumbing to it. And this ultimately makes you powerless to inspire any love and devotion from men!
How SURE can you be that prettier women are happier than you?
Some other woman is frightfully jealous of you, as you sit here, reading this.
She’s jealous that you seem so confident, or she’s jealous that you’ve already had a child, or she’s jealous that you have more free time or that you make more money than her, or have more friends than her. It’s really whatever she conjures up in her head.
By succumbing to the fear cycle all the time, you miss the real important thing: other women who seem to have more than you don’t necessarily suffer LESS than you. But that’s the illusion that we give ourselves.
There’s always prettier women
Truth: there are always prettier women. Always.
There are always women with a better figure. I don’t care if you think you’ve got the best figure ever. Some other person could come along and totally trash your figure and say you’re ugly just because they want to make you feel bad.
What are you going to do then? Yell at them and say “NO! I have the best figure ever! F*** you!”
You could…but you’d just be fighting like children.
My point is that feeling like you have the ‘best’ figure or face is relative, and it’s also feeble because of its relative nature.
As such, it’s much better to focus on what value you can bring to a man’s life.
CLICK HERE to discover the ONE PHRASE you can say to ANY man that will capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say! (Works like magic in a high vale non-needy way!)
It’s not that you shouldn’t feel threatened…
I don’t write this so that you can walk away and say ‘I SHOULDN’T feel threatened’ and block out your own fears. Absolutely not. After all, your fears will always exist. We can just get better at directing our focus elsewhere, and choosing to be more of ourselves instead.
But what I have to suggest to you is this: your only way to get through this kind of pain is to be more of yourself.
How can you do that? Here’s how…
How To Not Feel threatened by Another Woman In A Relationship: Become A Woman Of Value To HIM.
As I mentioned earlier, the best way to not feel triggered and threatened all the time, is to actually become a woman of value – to MEN.
Here is how to stop feeling threatened by other women in 3 steps:
- Choose to exist openly as love, an open celebration of love and life by becoming more feminine.
- Choose to be a woman of value, a woman who focuses on adding value to a man. (One way I recommend to add value to men is to learn how to build emotional attraction through high value banter. You can read more about that in this article on How To Banter.)
- Focus on building emotional connection and emotional attraction. These are the two crucial elements that will make your relationship rock solid.
The best thing to do to fix feeling insecure around other women is to invest directly in your own value.
You can’t kill every other pretty woman, or every younger woman…and why would you want to? They are a wonderful gift to this world.
Your only solution is to be more of yourself. And that means investing in yourself and adding value to others.
The power is in where you choose to put your focus!
- Breathe when you’re interacting with others. Allow your body to feel connected and free to just be.
- Ask yourself how their beauty can inspire you to become more beautiful, and therefore more of yourself.
A lot of times, what you see as simply ‘good genetics’ is actually that woman’s open femininity and attractiveness; something she practices from within.
(There Are Exactly 7 Signs That A Woman is Perceived as Low Value to Men. Do You Know What They Are? (& How to Avoid Them Like the Plague)? Click here to find out right now…)
There are 7 common signs a woman is perceived as low value to all men, because men simply perceive value differently to women. Do you know what these signs are and how to avoid them like the plague? CLICK HERE to download this special report.
Unconventional Way To Move Beyond Feeling Threatened By Other Women
Befriend or offer value to the women whom you admire or feel secretly afraid of and jealous of.
Allow their energy and their attitude to inspire you! Don’t be a small person!
For me, when I moved on from this years ago, I felt best when I made friends with and connected with the women who seemed to be prettier than me or have more than me. Because I knew I had to openly live through that fear with raw vulnerability.
The crazy thing is that when I did this, I found out I had made a bunch of successful and pretty friends who were timid themselves!
Strangely, as I got closer to these women, to my shock I realised that they felt I was prettier than them or that I had a better husband.
My selfish brain didn’t get that at the time. Then I realised we were all playing that stupid game of:
“But I thought YOU had a better life than me!!?’
So I’m curious…If you were to open raw and be more of yourself, what would you do differently today?
If you were choosing to add to your own intrinsic value, what would you do right now that is different from the typical thing you do as a routine every single day of the week?
I’d really love to hear what you are thinking after reading this, in the comments section below! Thanks for reading 🙂
(By the way, I want to teach you 5 secrets to having your man fall deeply in love with you and beg you to be his one and only. These 5 secrets are inside of my brand new program. Click HERE to get yourself a copy before they run out!)
If you want to be supported by a warm community of high value feminine women, then join our Facebook Group. (It’s free and so incredibly valuable!) CLICK HERE TO join thousands of other women in our “High Value Feminine Women” Community.
By the way, while you’re at it, connect with me on social media.
Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.