Why Men Do Not Want to Marry

why men don't want to marry

 Why Men do not want to Marry and How to Become the Kind of Woman Men Want to Marry

Before I begin, let me just share a few extracts taken from an anti-marriage website:

“My wife was a frigid, shrivelled b***h. Before we were married, we had plenty of sex, but as soon as we passed the six month mark after our wedding, she stopped being interested. My wife only f***s when she “feels sexy.” Translation: when I give her jewellery. She is just a withered old bag at the age of 35.”

“What security is there for men in marriage? If I cheat on my wife, she gets half my s**t. If she cheats on me, she still gets half my s**t. Why the f*** should i get married”

“We had one kid. Wife stays home, but the kid wears her out. I bust my f****** ASS 60 hrs/week and get no credit. Wife gives me guilt when I don’t throw everything down right after work to watch this screaming, annoying f****** kid so she can go out to the gym, or to some restaurant with her friends, or to her sister’s house to watch movies.

She gets to take naps during the day when the baby sleeps, and every time I call her on the cell during the day, she is at Starbucks with her Mom or friends. She says that doesn’t count as “Her time” because she’s with the baby.

I’ve had enough. I feel so undervalued and OWNED. She is so ‘entitled’ now it’s like 60 (or 70, or 80) hours a week from me is EXPECTED. Being at work from 8-7 counts as my ‘social’ time, so I am not allowed to have any friends or ever do ANYTHING outside of change F****** DIAPERS”

Hi there :)

I hope you’re having a lovely day and I haven’t thrown you off with those comments above! Now I am sure that, even just by reading these words you can see the frustration, resentment and anger inside these men.

(Please note: whilst I acknowledge that marriage takes 2, and that men need to step up and take charge of their own actions as well – this website is for women, so I focus mainly on what can be done from the woman’s end).

It’s true; if I was a man in this day and age, I would be quite put off marriage to many of the the modern women in the Western world. Truth be told, the state of our society has done some really bad things to the balance of masculine-feminine and to the values of women and men.

The reason why men do not marry is actually really simple. A lot of men feel that there is nothing in it for them! And what IS in it for them when they don’t have a good woman? The fast-moving modern world that we live in has ensured that women are working longer hours, juggling more responsibilities, and progressively less able to place their men as their top priority.

In fact, most women place their children at the top of their priorities – which may seem like the best thing to do, but men can grow to resent this as their women are more fulfilled taking care of their kids than they are taking care of their men.

In the meantime, their man gets/feels neglected. Even more important – most women just have no idea how men work. They do not understand them, and most of them do not want to understand them; they’re too busy attending to their other tasks or priorities – in other words, themselves.

However, just as you want to be understood; so does your man! It’s important to not be a man-hater, or a man-basher and stop putting everything down to “Men just want sex”. This is not always true, and true love does exist.

How to become marriage material

So how do you become the kind of woman men want to marry? I will give some strategies below:

- Stop thinking of yourself. Spend 60 days taking responsibility for your man’s needs and seeing things from his perspective, no matter how hard things are for you. If you do this, he may be more receptive to your needs and you will most likely get him in a different state; a state where you can bring up the topic of your needs with him.

- Understand him, and how he works. Work out what his needs and values are, and start to understand. If you’re often defensive, start to seek understanding. Understanding gives you control and empowerment. (read my article about ease your worries on men)

You’ll have a lot more certainty and happiness in your relationship if you start to understand that you DO have control over it – and you CAN make it better. More importantly, if you know how to meet his needs in a variety of ways better than anyone else ever could – he would have no reason not to want to be with you for as long as possible!

- Do not deny him sex regularly and do not use it as a commodity; do not ever use sex to specifically get what you want from him, if you want sex to be, for the long-term, a mutually enjoyable thing that you both share together.

Also, when you do sleep with him, be real, be honest and be generous. What do I mean by this? I mean understand him and learn why he wants sex. Don’t do it hoping it will be over soon. He knows this. He feels it.

It is very hard on a man to be sleeping with a woman who wants it to be over, and treats his sexual needs as another “chore” to be done on the list. It’s important that you make time for him, and for the both of you to be together and to keep the passion alive and kicking.

- Have high standards for yourself. Get fit, eat well. Also, just because you have had a child does not mean it’s ok to be overweight, depressed or “old” or no fun anymore. My lovely, as hard as it can be to look after so many things, and to have so many things on your mind, make it a habit to set your standards high.

If you want the great rewards and a fantastic loving husband who adores you, start by adoring him and understanding him. Understand that a man like his wife to look nice, not just for the sake of looking nice, BUT because he wants to know that his wife/girlfriend still CARES enough to bother making herself look nice for him.

This goes regardless of age. Just because a woman is 60, does not mean she can’t look good anymore. It’s more about never getting “old” on the inside, which then affects the outside.

These are a few good things that you can do to ensure you are on the right track to being the kind of woman a man wants to marry. And, it’s not all about getting a man to marry you or commit to you, it’s about starting by giving without expecting anything in return. (read my article about the difference between pleasing and giving)

Men aren’t as terrible as so many women say. They are not “all the same”, and men are happy to be loyal and give to us and cherish a good woman who takes care of his needs and gives beyond herself. They are not always unreasonable creatures, there are compassionate, caring men around.

And, your man should do the same, too. Relationships are about giving. 

If you would like to know exactly step by step how to inspire your man to commit to you and marry you, I suggest you sign up to my program Commitment Control. It is the best program of its kind to help women in casual situations to a deeply devoted and committed relationship. Click here to find out more about it. 

Renee the feminine woman

180 Comments

  • Bailey

    Reply Reply February 11, 2014

    Dear Rene, I could not take the time to read all of the comments but you sure stirred up a bees nest. I came very late into this web site but I am glad I did although, I can only see things getting worse until Government rules and regulations esp. Family Courts come clean and be accountable for the devastation they more than any Institution has created. Feminists did call for Equality and yet they are SILENT when it comes to the unequality of this … (can’t type the word here) Institution. Yet, churches do practically nothing to change this. I have been wondering what will happen when our Family Law Act goes after ethnic fathers eventually such as Muslims, Hindus, Asian, and even Spanish…those men are not marrying for the most part Caucasian males either and so “the … will likely hit the fan” through our newly acquired Immigrants. I wish I had been born MUCH earlier in time where I could have had that large family I yearned for but only was allowed one whom I don’t see much but loves his Daddy immensely while becoming the Whimp the X has created dominating him but certainly not the “whiner” that infests LOLO’s heart and mind above. There is no reaching the many but even a few are enlightened, my parent’s wonderful marriage-type may be preserved and it was that hated word “Traditional” Thanks for the article.

  • Bailey

    Reply Reply February 11, 2014

    For decades there have been a growing number of factors why fewer males marry now; as one whom extremely believed in marriage for most of my life due to watching the WW2 generation being relatively fulfilled yet never is it perfect, I’ve since then watched Baby Boomers gradually destroy marriage in everyway possible. One key point even though it took both genders to do this: {fact} > Males have not changed while females have undergone a drastic change and consequently, once a child is born it increases the risk for fathers to live a life of hell multifold and NOT because of the precious child but because of the “entitled ownership” claimed by so many mothers of 3 generations now to…the child, their time, their careers, their Social network, their locating where to live, their Matriarch family, their controlled Family Court >> which is a Killer for marriage as most younger men are aware of seeing what happened to their biological fathers. Personally, I’m divorced yet never wanted it however ~ 85 % of separations today see the mother leaving the father because they KNOW they will be looked after financially from different sources. Would I marry again, ONLY with a legally pre-nuptial arrangement and yet lol that won’t happen because I lost hundreds of thousands fighting for my child and therefore have been financially depleted while she has not. Marriage was once a sacred ceremony base on Holiness and not $$ as it is now. And as for stay-at-home fathers; if a man does that even though liberated women say it’s ok, Stats show that their divorce rate is REALLY high so whose lying? Sad isn’t it…and if a man dares to speak traditionally most women are all over him as a male chauvinist pig. If a western man thinks marrying outside of his race think again PLEASE…you will also be married to her family wherever she is from and $$$ will again be the most attracting factor. Rene raises some very valid points as to why marriage will likely become obsolete and as for the swearing by the selected men, you don’t need to resort to that in getting your heart heard. God help us all for when family crumbles the society will crumble.

  • Lance

    Reply Reply February 1, 2014

    My opinion is to not think of finding a woman as a checklist item to be achieved. I truly love women and I know that their are a lot of women that have been screwed around by men and its made them wake up and be choosy and more aware. I don’t have to have a woman in my life to feel happy. I live my life and if I meet a woman I may date or marry or just be friends. People compete for sex like its a game and they want to win and show how they are superior to others, I could careless who people screw it means nothing to me at all. Life is short and I don’t want to play these silly games. I like my life and freedom and dont need a woman to be happy.

  • tchotchke

    Reply Reply December 28, 2013

    Wow, this is all quite depressing. What should be obvious here is that PEOPLE have all become shit. I’m sure Americans are big offenders but it’s being imported to other countries as well. Men are blaming feminism but I think birth control (which has caused the elimination of the extended family) and pornography (which makes men disinterested in their women sexually, disrespectful in their sexuality and frankly or borderline impotent) are huge contributors.

    Look at what the Bible says; in Matthew 24 Jesus’s disciples asked Him, “What shall be the sign of thy coming, and of the end of the world?”

    He listed many things including, “Then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.” and “Because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.”

    Ponder these last two scriptures and think how they encompass the behavior being complained about here by both men and women.

    • Luke

      Reply Reply January 10, 2014

      Typical scenario:-

      Your wife divorces you – takes 60% of all assets (that’s typical) – makes you pay spousal support, child support and makes it extremely difficult to see your kids.

      You are sitting in a tiny bedsit looking at 4 walls with hardly enough money to pay your bills.

      NOW, let’s see how your ‘wonderful all-knowing’ bible gets on with it’s advice in that situation – a few ‘Hail Marys’ & ‘Our Fathers’ isn’t going to cut it…

      • karen_o

        Reply Reply January 17, 2014

        Typical scenario:

        Man physically and emotionally abuses woman, who leaves for her & her children’s welfare. She finally files for divorce after he refuses to make any changes and now has acquired a girlfriend, who is pregnant.

        Man lies about income & evades child support. Woman & kids live in a tiny apartment while she works full time to support them, barely able to cover their basic needs & with no help from their father. Man lives in nice home with his girlfriend & new baby.

        Man uses the kids as weapons to get back at his ex for leaving him. He drags her to court over custody, but then fails to pick his kids up when he’s supposed to take them, and when they are with him he ignores them. His new family is priority, until he starts beating on that woman also & she leaves him too.

        Oh wait – what does the Bible say? Cherish your wife as your own body, as Christ does the congregation; a man who professes faith but doesn’t care for his family is worse than one without faith at all; and a wife should have deep respect for her husband. These principles help AVOID that situation.

        • Greg

          Reply Reply January 17, 2014

          the more typical scenario circa 2014,

          The good men get married because he’s in love,
          the wife stops the sexing after getting bored with the chore. He turns to a dating site to find it, she gets fatter and lazier.
          Everyones happy, except the single guys.
          Who just have too satisfy themselves, drink beer n play video games, in watch internet porn.

        • Luke

          Reply Reply January 22, 2014

          “Man physically and emotionally abuses woman”
          =============================================

          Nope, 50% of such abuse is committed by women – so not quite so typical.

          =========================
          Man lies about income & evades child support.
          =========================

          Very difficult to do – and as you add that he lives in a nice house it’s practically impossible.

          ========================
          Man uses the kids as weapons to get back at his ex for leaving him.
          ========================

          Nope, it’s the other way round, women get custody unless they are mentally incompetent, in jail – or dead. A man’s lawyer will tell him not to waste his time if she is at all competent because he will never win. So again, NOT typical.

          Oh, and remember – nothing fails like prayer :-)

        • Bailey

          Reply Reply February 11, 2014

          Karen, I have spoken to 1,000s of women w.r.t. this hot topic and one pervasive common denominator is crystal clear which is, during these discussions practically ALL of them revert to “I” and “me” thus ONLY seeing what happened to them is what matters and it therefore happens to ALL women. You have just done the same Karen while ignoring the stats of Family Court that usually does exactly what Luke has stated ending up crippling too many fathers who Karen, since they need a woman in their life, end up living with yes another woman and her kids; result, he ends up not seeing his own child enough while playing second fiddle to his new woman’s kids as a so called Step Dad. The new woman now has another source of income and so it goes on. I believe that Counselling sessions should be mandatory even before co-habituating as they are now before a divorce MAY be granted. Children are taking a beating. Personally, I’d never insult scriptures at this stage of our cultural game because they seem to be looking accurate.

    • Joan

      Reply Reply January 31, 2014

      That’s all nice, but can you think of something positive? I’m just wondering. Its hard I know, but I choose to just change for the better myself, and teach these things to my own daughters.

  • Leon

    Reply Reply December 27, 2013

    Men aren’t even preparing for marriage anymore. More and more Men don’t even bother to seek higher education these days because they have already decided they are not getting married. So they don’t need the higher paying jobs that come with 90 hour weeks and ulcers. Men have finally figured out that getting married, having children, working their butts off and then have their wife cheat and divorce them and take everything they own and then be told it’s all their fault, isn’t a very good deal. Why would a man want to put himself through such a nightmare?

  • nunya

    Reply Reply December 26, 2013

    This article seems to approach this from a perspective of men who are already married getting frustrated (women spend too much time with their kids? huh?).

    You’re not getting down to the nitty gritty of why more men don’t want to get married at all.

    I posted a long version. Here’s the short version – why bother? Think about it hard ladies. Aside from sex and children, what are you bringing to the table?

    Yesterday, for Christmas, my girlfriend gave me two tickets to a musical she wants to see. She’s wanted to get married for a while now and she wonders why I don’t. It isn’t the gift, it’s just…why? When we were younger she didn’t want to get married. She wanted to keep it light and play the field. Now we’re older, I make a good living and have my stuff together. Why should I bother?

    • Kim

      Reply Reply December 26, 2013

      You just have a crappy girlfriend. There are plenty of women you could have chosen from that dont act that way. But by now they are married to men and stuck in miserable marriages where their husband are financially controlling, shallow, disrespectful and emotionally neglectful…thats how most married men are.

      • Luke

        Reply Reply December 31, 2013

        Well Kim, if the women are miserable I know the men are definitely miserable so let’s just dump marriage altogether – it’s obviously the best for everyone :-)

      • Greg

        Reply Reply January 10, 2014

        Yet, these women blame men for their poor choices.
        Its does seem that marriage gets stale, boring and a chore.
        Society and the government dress marriage up as the main goal and allege that men live longer and are happier in marriage, plus give couples massive tax benefits. The negative statistics of marriage say otherwise. 70% of divorces are instigated by women, often as soon as menopause kicks in. Women across the west outlive men by 5 years, so will be reaping most working mens pension payments. Women are lazy in bed.

  • nunya

    Reply Reply December 26, 2013

    Real simple (and some of this applies only to men who don’t want to get married and probably not all of those):

    1. Men lose in divorce court
    2. Men lose when it comes to the police / law (a woman can beat up a man, call the police and they’ll drag him away)
    3. Men lose in custody cases and a woman, while not all do it, can use their children against them in a separation.
    4. Women, on the surface, say they don’t need men, but when you are married 100% of a man’s income goes to supporting the family, while a woman’s income is ‘hers.’ – this isn’t true in all cases, but for a man who doesn’t want to get married, it would be a concern. Men who aren’t concerned about this (meaning they take their wife’s earnings and blow their own) probably love getting married and abusing their wives.
    5. Women can be unappreciative of all the things a man does.
    6. Men are less valued in culture, always have been, but now more than ever. If you are going to be less valued, why not get a job, keep your money, do what you like and take it easy.
    7. There’s far more financial uncertainty now with regards to employment and the economy. Somehow it has become more expensive for two people to live together. A single man can survive relatively easily (at least up into old age)and with the mobility from being single, if he is educated and has work experience, he can pretty much go where he wants or wherever his career takes him.
    8. Women seem less interested in sticking it out anymore. They don’t like being married, they get a divorce (women file for divorce 2x as often as men and the most common complaint is irreconcilable differences. When men file, the most common complaint is adultery.)
    9. Women have more advantages in terms of education (funding and acceptance), jobs (hiring requirements) and pretty soon pay (they’ve been pushing for that legislation every day for years). Why should a man work just as hard and spend the rest of his life hearing a woman talk about how oppressed she is. Better to be single.

    • Kim

      Reply Reply December 26, 2013

      The stat about women filing for divorce is skewed. That stat refers to who put the petition to the court. The person who does the filing does not always want the divorce. I know 5 women off the top of my head that filed because their husbands became unfaithful, abusive, emotionally neglectful for years on end and the women tried EVERYTHING to get the neglect to stop. Their husbands behaviorally and mentally checked out of the marriages but refused to file. So, no, just because women file more doesnt mean women want to divorce more. And frankly, men become more disrespectful and complacent in marriages than women do. Once a man snags a woman, he stops all the things he did that made her fall in love with him.

      and men are NEVER unappreciative of women? You are ridiculous…most women have to threaten divorce to get a man to wake up and smell the roses and realize he takes her for granted. “Dont know what you have til its gone” definitely applies to men more than women for marriages AND breakups. Thats because men are more selfish. They do what they want and think of consequences later.

      100% of a mans income goes to his family? Women are getting a paid life of luxury? What a huge stereotype. Where the he** do you live? I see so many families where women contribute 50% or close to it to their family, and on top of that, spend more of ther own paycheck/money on their kids while their husbands spend their own paycheck/money on TVs, phones, useless electronic gadgets and so on.

      • Luke

        Reply Reply December 31, 2013

        I don’t agree with any of what you say but anyway if you feel like that it’s another fantastic argument for NOT getting married :-)

      • karen_o

        Reply Reply January 17, 2014

        Yes – this is reality for most. I don’t know what tiny % of wealthy people these other poster are coming from.

        Women are pushed to “have it all now” which really means “do it all” now. A man is expected to go to work, come home, do what he wants, & cut the grass on the weekend. Sometimes he “helps” with the kids, mainly when it’s fun.

        A woman is expected to get the kids ready for school, go to work full-time, go grocery shopping, come home, make dinner, get the kids ready for bed, clean-up, and still have energy for sex with someone who has no interest in her as a human being. She should also look young & sexy while doing all of this.

  • KingChris

    Reply Reply December 23, 2013

    Women love to complain how hard it is to raise kids. I would love to trade my 60 hour a week job in construction to raise children. Women tend to complain about any adversity!

  • beats by dre

    Reply Reply December 5, 2013

    “In many of our rivers, anglers are being encouraged to release salmon and sea trout they have caught, and increasing numbers of them are doing this. It is unacceptable therefore, that against this background, other sport fishermen may try to catch as many of these fish as possible so that they can sell them. beats by dre http://www.lydianaconfectionery.com/images/beats-by-dre.asp

  • The Real Answer

    Reply Reply November 5, 2013

    Because it is the women that always will win when you go to Court, and many of us men out there already have lost Thousands Of Dollars.

    • Bailey

      Reply Reply February 11, 2014

      And that IS “The Real Answer” or at least top at the list. I HATE to agree with Luke too however, not marrying or co-habituating {same thing anymore} seems to be the safest route to follow and yet, children are the #1 blessing. A friend suggested recently that IF males withhold their Seed this may change their tune especially when they reach late 20s into their 30s. If it has gotten that bad WOW to suggest this, our creator (which is not a human being or a spot on the wall as a lady I knew once referred to her Spirituality), must be incredibly upset and maybe hurting too having given us Choice to decide.

  • Shadowman

    Reply Reply October 12, 2013

    Another reason Men do not want to marry AmeriKan women is because of so many being hypocrites. I have PERSONAL expirience with this.
    Okay, Men are always being told they are too “superficial” and only care about how women look. (I do beleive there IS truth to that) However we are conversely told Women are NEVER Shallow and ONLY care about a man’s personality, and NOT HIS LOOKS.
    Well, I am (litterally) one of the nicest people you could hope to meet (Well, I USED to be, I guess) I tend to be generous, a good listener (been told that a billion times)considerate, kind and good hearted. Haven’t had a date in around 25 years. And y’ know WHY? ’cause I’m SHORT,(about 5’4”) Blind in one eye, Have to walk with a cane, have problems with my back (all due to an old injury, by the way)and “look strange”.
    Need I say more…?

  • rosesonly

    Reply Reply October 8, 2013

    I have raised two young men. They are stand out human beings, warm, loving, generous , responsible.

    The older , after a few college years dating , has met a wonderful young women and has told me he wants the long term with her. The younger has had a responsible caring Learner relationship too.

    My friends kids,and my nephews are all similar. They are respectful, caring of their girlfriends and keen to have relationships that work . Two of these young men are recently engaged in their early 20′s. Others are making long term plans.

    I feel saddened to read such negative things about young men and how they are turning out. These young men I describe are marriage minded and definitely great husband material.

    Love to them all.

    • Roy

      Reply Reply October 8, 2013

      Well, you are setting them up for potential financial destruction later in life then – the chances of at least one of these “warm, loving, generous, responsible young men” ending up stuffed in divorce court is extremely high.

  • Seriously Speaking

    Reply Reply September 28, 2013

    it is very sad nowadays that many women have become so Very Pathetic, especially the ones that like to Cheat so very much.

  • Kimberly

    Reply Reply September 10, 2013

    No worries. Odds are I wont marry because men view women as objects rather than human beings. Everything about us boils down to how fuckable we are and what we can do to serve men. We arent bothered to be valued as human beings unless we are goodlooking and can take care of men.

    Very few men want an equal, thats why I wont marry. Men dont like marriage nowadays because women dont have to put up with their crap, plus we get to have feelings and desires of our own. Men HATE to lose power and control. Some men Ive observed say they want an equal, but they just say that to snag a woman. Their actions speak louder than words. My generation of men are narcissistic, stuck up and insanely superficial. None have good qualities to make good husbands. Why the heck would I tie myself down to that? Whats in it for me? I own my own house, have my own career and own friends and hobbies. I dont need a man. Most are just animals, not human beings, and dont deserve a place in my life.

    • Roy

      Reply Reply September 10, 2013

      That’s good, you don’t need a man and men don’t want your attitude, you offer nothing of benefit to them except grief and you don’t want an ‘animal’ so it’s a win-win all round :-)

    • Greg

      Reply Reply September 10, 2013

      Why are you blaming men that are created by the feminist school system. Feminist dont want equality, its about power.
      Society reaps what it sows.

    • Anna

      Reply Reply September 11, 2013

      I don’t think that all men see women as objects rather than human beings. By saying that, I feel you are objectifying men. Men ARE human beings but in the end we are all animals. Men will always have that primal desire but so do women, in different ways. And just like women can be cultured and civilised, so can men.

      Part of the responses people get from the world is in response to the beliefs they put out: If you think men are all pigs, then you will more likely notice all the men who are pigs and not notice the ones who are not. And you will be more likely to come across other infantile men. And aside from this Law of Attraction business, how does the belief that men are animals serve you? Does it make you feel good or bad to think this? I mean seriously. It can’t make you feel good to think of men this way. Perhaps deep down inside you know this is not true, but a mask you put on to hide yourself from something. You don’t need a man, really? Look deep inside yourself and ask yourself what causes you to say that. I’m not saying anything you said is wrong, I’m just trying to change the channel.

      • Kimberly

        Reply Reply September 11, 2013

        I dont see men as animals. But they for sure see women as objects…I have only met a handful that do not. Most men just want a woman so they have someone to serve them or someone to screw. They dont care about anything else and feign sincere interest in women to keep them around. Its a game to them.

        It doesnt make me feel good but at least I can handle reality unlike other people. I kind of laugh at the majority of women I meet who think their boyfriend really like them as a person. Nope, they like your screwing ability and how you can serve them their needs.

        Feminism = equality. The majority of relationships I observe are not equal: the male still thinks hes superior to the female. You all are thinking of radical feminism…Im not some extreme feminist who thinks all men should be banned to caves.

        And I dont need a man, because why would I waste time with a person who doesnt see me as a person? Pretty obvious answer.

  • Kim

    Reply Reply September 9, 2013

    Im not an idiot. I don’t open my legs to players ever. In dating I get called prude more so than that

  • Greg

    Reply Reply September 9, 2013

    Every time I hear a women calling me a idiot, i see her opening her legs to a player. The modern under 30 years male has been made by a feminized education system, nearly with no father input.
    Guys should just leave it to the religous types to breed, they dont pay tax n fight all the wars anyway, unless the poor suckers are doing it.
    Men are just a second paycheck is reinforced by all the media, where men, are all but invisible in decision making as alpha male types.
    Im glad Im not a man in America.
    Good luck dudes, get a passport in travel n see what the world has to offer.
    Dont believe Hollywood and in what Disneyland says what relationships are.

  • Greg

    Reply Reply September 9, 2013

    I’l raise my point again.
    Women are raisin men nowadays in a more than ever crafted environment.
    If you dont like how men are turning ut, especially the under 30 year olds, then women have no one to blame bu themselfs. Less and less men are having less input into raising their sons. |Society now has to dress marriage up as a positive goal with more state handouts han ever before.
    Women want equality but will always focus on social status much more than a women will ver do. How many movie stars now only marry other guys who are stars all of them. Men by comparison marry often outside their socil status, ofetn never marrying up but always down.
    The media dress up marriage as a end game when its now just a competition, theirs no benefit for men to get married except to be a second paycheck. Stay single guys, travel, if you breed its going to cost you either which way, the stats dont lie, your likely going to get dumped once she hits menopause. Get a passport in travel, you dont need to join your military to do that.

  • Kimberly Flanagan

    Reply Reply September 9, 2013

    Men who complain there aren’t any traditional women anymore who bad men to marry. Traditional men are men who like to control and use women. These type of men think they should call the shots on everything and they are superior to women. These kind of men think women are sex/attention objects to be used for whatever they want…not human beings with thoughts and desires like themselves.

    People who are traditional just don’t like the idea of giving up power and control. Most men today are too insecure to be in an equal marriage

  • Kimberly Flanagan

    Reply Reply September 9, 2013

    Yeah, this website is ridiculous. Most men today aren’t marriage material. Men today are more selfish, entitled and complacent than ever.
    Women today are expected to work full time like a man and pay half of her share towards bills even when she is in a profession where she busts her ass and makes less money. PLUS, women are expected to still do the majority of the housework and childcare compared to men. Did you know that over 80% of married couples where BOTH work full time, over 70% of childcare and housework is still done by men? Did you know that for decades research studies have shown married women are more depressed than single women, yet the reverse is found for men? Men get taken care of. Even with women working, they STILL get taken care of and if a woman wants equality…she is a “stuck up bitch”. I have a degree in social research and a lot of it in marriage and family shows MEN overall as being more selfish. There are always exceptions but men tend to be more lazy and selfish.

    Did you know in over 70% of couples that cohabit before marriage the woman has to pressure the guy to get married? You know why? Because men are selfish and entitled and only want a woman who can cook clean and fuck whoever he wants without commitment.

    Men today don’t want to get married because narcissism is rampant in our society and men don’t want to give up anything. Really there are very few men around my age. I am 26. There are BOYS around me, who are selfish and lack responsibility.

    Also the fact that no matter how awesome a girl can be as a wife, men still feel its okay to be disrespectful to her because hes “a guy” and has to ogle other women. Also, did you know around 60% of cheating married men have wives that they find to be sexually satisfying and are emotionally satisfied with? So even if youre a great wife, that’s NO buffer against your man cheating. And us women are expected to forgive and forget and think about our children, when guys don’t do it when they bury their dick in another woman. If a wife cheats on a guy, hes entitled to divorce her and move on and nobody judges him. If a woman divorces a cheating man, she is just too sensitive and “doesn’t understand how men are.”

    • Kimberly Flanagan

      Reply Reply September 9, 2013

      *is still done by women

      Men, do 20% of housework and child care on average…even when his wife works full time

      • Greg

        Reply Reply September 9, 2013

        Men invented all the cleaning machines that freed women from domestic slavery n being maids.
        Women only clean hotel rooms because they work cheaper.
        Men work in more dangerous low skilled jobs because its cheap for them to.
        What business want the media attention of a women being killed in a low paid job. There is less media attention when a man is killed.
        Womens call for equality has seen their pay rates move forward, while mens worth has been devalued.
        Up until Reagonics a man a dignity, could work, raise a nuclear family, pay of a house, now in 2013, whats the American legacy.
        A man isnt worth much.

    • Roy

      Reply Reply September 10, 2013

      “Did you know that for decades research studies have shown married women are more depressed than single women, yet the reverse is found for men?”
      =================================

      Well Kimberly, as usual it depends on how you build the statistics, for instance most unmarried women in their thirties don’t seem to be too happy, the ones on the cock carousel in their twenties might be.

      I’ve read your posts, you appear to be a biased misandrist, so do us all a favour with your hatred of men – DON’T GET MARRIED – we think marriage is a terrible deal for men so don’t snare some poor sap into marrying you (and then bitching about him and screwing him financially).

      You will be doing everyone a favour…

    • Joe Capone

      Reply Reply November 16, 2013

      From my experience when men do help or even do the housework it is never up to the little wifeys standard and shell redo it anyway

      • Riv

        Reply Reply November 30, 2013

        From my experience, untrue! I am a woman who splits housework 50/50 with my partner, and he does an amazing job. I would never be so insulting. My mom did that to me (micromanaged/redid anything I did) and I know how bad it feels.

    • Bailey

      Reply Reply February 11, 2014

      Why Kimberley “ridiculous” webs site? Is it because a woman {Rene} has shed some Truths and you are not use to hearing the other side especially coming from your same gender? This is Telling and I knew it would come where enlightened women would be the ones to question what the Libs have done Kimberley so take a deep breath and admit statistical facts because IF ladies who think as you do don’t come clean at least with obvious points, they will continue to be part and parcel to blame for our childrens’ major problems…not just fathers.

  • Carl

    Reply Reply August 28, 2013

    There is an epidemic of cheating wives, initiating divorce for monetary gain, and the power of having children over their x husband. Men are your children really yours? Is wife truly faithful? The answers may surprise you. If shes coming late from work, watch out. If you notice a change in her behavior, there is a reason for it. When women cheat, they have their child in your marriage. A lot states it does not matter if the child is yours. You still have to pay child support. The answer is nation wide DNA Testing for all children born, to prove whom the father is. Lets call it a cheat test. Women lie more then men, especially about their adulterous affairs even on national statistical surveys. Women are taught at a very young age to lie. They lie to get into a relationship, they lie to stay in a relationship, and they lie to get out of a relationship. When a women’s lips are moving, their is a very good chance she lying. Don’t get married, take responsibilities of your reproductive rights. Do not give children to just any women. Make sure she is deserving of your seed. Use condoms, always, never accept the fact that she is on birth control. Best to go to a sperm back and make a deposit, and then get a vasectomy, This way you are in control of your reproductive rights

  • Carl

    Reply Reply August 28, 2013

    Yes, there are a lot of good men out there. In truth it is extremely difficult finding an American women that will truly honor her vows in marriage. Respect is the key, to successful relationship, with out it, it’s over before it began. If a mans place in marriage is to work until he drops, we are going to have a lot of died men on our hands, before their time. If he does not feel, love and respect, from his wife, and his kids. He will question, what is it all for. If we are just an means to end, Children, marriage will not be worth going into for most men. A man’s place is in the home as well, and if their is no love or respect. Why would he continue, or even get married again. We as men, want the same things in life, as a women does. Its time for the American Women to reevaluate their relationships with their man. We as men, feel pain, and sadness too, especially when we are not appreciated by our women, our Lady. So the next time, you think of yourself, and your wants and desires. Look to you man, your husband and say to yourself what is his dreams and desires. Your going to be surprised, he wants love, and respect too.

  • Lolo

    Reply Reply August 16, 2013

    I only read half these comments and I am laughing. You older women are right, you definetely get the lucky pick of the litter, men who were raised to be men. The majority of men under 30 are a sad set. I love how these “male” commentors fear losing their earnings as if they even work manly jobs. If their computer breaks down, half of them couldn’t find the plug to put it back in. They are so frickin whiney it’s no wonder they can’t attract women. They hide behind computers crying about how awful American women are and trying to what, make us jealous, that they’re buying a woman who will tolerate their nonsense. And they fail to see the only reason these women are with them is for their citizenship, not because they’re real “men”.
    Note to all you male posters, trolling a female blog, to rant about the evil non-feminine American woman: joke’s on you, you aren’t the men we’re trying to attract. That’s why you have time to post here. The men we want are out working a real job or playing a sport for fun or riding their motorcycle, in the elements, using their real-life masculinity. Don’t blame women for how pathetic you are. Sheesh, whining is the opposite of masculinity. Oh and just so you know, masculine men revere women (of all kinds) ~ they’re the yin to the yang, they don’t tear them down with this kind of disgusting venom but I’d guess they don’t teach that on “dude code” or whatever pathetic blog you read.
    Lucky for me, I’ve got one of the few young ones who will actually work his tail off and knows how to be a man and receptive to a modern woman who works as hard as he does. It took me a long time to find an actual man among these little whiney boys. And my sister was lucky enough to find one too~ amazing, loving father, and supportive provider.
    So guess what ladies, ignore these “male?” trolls. The good manly men are out there. They are just really hard to find but if you are a quality lady, you’ll get there.

    • Roy

      Reply Reply August 16, 2013

      Well, don’t worry, because we’re laughing at YOU, the shaming BS won’t work any more I’m afraid – and I’m sorry for your son – it sounds like he is really stuffed.

      As for attracting the likes of you – it’s not a problem because we’re not interested in your type anyway :-D

      • Sunny Mittal

        Reply Reply August 19, 2013

        You read my comments there in Indian/Chinese Iq puzzle where I said to that Strategy….people are all laughing at you blah blah but it was an educational argument,not an argument related to relationship.

    • YOLO

      Reply Reply August 20, 2013

      Your “husband” (wife?) needs to put his dick back in your mouth. You’re spewing too much bullshit.

      • Bailey

        Reply Reply February 11, 2014

        There’s another Syndrome

    • Paul

      Reply Reply August 24, 2013

      most of the women out there nowadays are just so VERY PATHETIC.

      • Carl

        Reply Reply August 28, 2013

        It does seem you are the type of person most men would run from. Your superiority complex is evident as if you are a gift to men. Most men that come to this site, were looking for answers, not for this particular sight. We were hoping to here from other men. For there is a lack of support groups for men, in general. I am the old guard, not the thirty something. I have never let a women pay may way or even her way every. Until just recently, when I started dating again. I found it refreshing, but at first very awkward. I worked 90 hours a weeks for over 30 years. I built a business, and a family from my sear will, by myself. ‘With out the help of my wife, she was a stay at house wife. Not really she never did any house work. I did, all of it. She cheated many times on me. and then want a divorce. Oh she got the house, 60 % of everything. You heard it before. In truth, a men risk everything getting married, to the wrong women. A women, takes a risk too, but most of times she makes out better then she started off with. My advise to young men, is be very careful, for the women of today are very different then 50 years ago. They are more selfish, then ever before. As men, progression in the duties of society and Marriage has lifted men . Women regress to a state of complete immorality. They use child as a weapon against caring fathers. They use sex, as a weapon to get what they want. I personally waited 4 1/2 years for my wife to make love to me. I never forgot my wedding vows, she did all the time. It was not because, I was a less of a man, it was because I wanted to make love for hours on end. She didn’t want to take the time, to be a wife. She cheated because, she could.and she felt privileged to do so. Their was no consequences for her actions. Advise to Men, if you are going to marry, marry up the economic ladder never down. Seek out your equal, finical and otherwise, Use the same yardstick that women use on men. Never marry a women that does not have a career of her own, a job something. Marry not just for love, marry for money too. Make sure she will be genetically and morally advanced, mental health issues are big problem.. Just maybe you will find the right women. maybe, maybe not. I know this type of women above, I married her, or should I say some one exactly like her. Her shit don’t stink type. Oh beware of this type women. Oh for the women out there, she is an example of a type of women not to be. Especial if you want to attract a good man.. Do we men not bleed when you cut us. Respect is key, not disrespecting each other. We men want to be loved, not used.

    • Greg

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      Why are you complaining about men under thirty, why blame men at all, its how women bring us up.
      Blame the sisterhood and feminism for mens behavior.
      Western women rarely accept any responsibility for their crap, and most blame it on hormones or periods. I really hate the so called bachelor d shows to arrange marriage, its infantial and shows what a competition it is to get your attention.When crap happens to yous its mostly all your fault.

    • KingChris

      Reply Reply December 23, 2013

      Your post is rather old, but I feel compelled to respond. You talk about whiny men who work behind a computer? I would love to know what type of noble work you do for you to judge men who see things and express them realistically

    • Bailey

      Reply Reply February 11, 2014

      You suffer from a syndrome I won’t type here

  • Anna

    Reply Reply August 9, 2013

    I went out with a client yesterday. He was going through a divorce. I don’t know much of the details, but his wife cheated on him with his best friend and since she doesn’t work, he will have to give her spousal support. He has a successful business and he’ll have to be giving her a large portion of his money. Sounds unfair right? He was married 30 years and never cheated and believed marriage was forever. He was the model husband. When I asked him if he thought he’d never get married again (he was over 50 years old), he said “No! I can’t wait to find the right woman and marry her!”

    Wow.

    It’s such a vast change in perspective. He was not jaded at all, and the worst possible experience, every man’s worst nightmare, had happened to him. Still, he was excited to find the right woman for him.

    Story #2. I asked my friend if he thought it was true that men are afraid to get married because the woman might cheat and walk away with half of his money (um… that’s why there are pre-nups!) and he said “Yeah, only the poor men would worry about that. I would say “Ok, take that business, take $2 million dollars of mine. I give my mistress $5 million anyway!”

    Moral of these stories are: If you come from the perspective of abundance… I think most of these resistances to marriage, or whatever, will fade away.

    • Anna

      Reply Reply August 9, 2013

      By the way, these were 2 different people.

    • Roy

      Reply Reply August 9, 2013

      Wow, this is such nonsense !

      For a start with #1 he will probably have to give her half his business to her just for starters – there will always be suckers who keep taking it – he’ll end up in a bedsit looking at 4 walls the way he is going…

      With #2 – actually most with lots of money are beginning to protect it now by lawyering up with heavy pre-nups in specific states or just not marrying at all – and although you might not be aware of it the number of idiots giving many millions of dollars to their mistresses are very few and far between.

      You are living in fantasy land Anna :-)

      • Anna

        Reply Reply August 9, 2013

        Haha thanks!

    • Bailey

      Reply Reply February 11, 2014

      Very sound thinking Anna you should share with LOLO above IF she would take it to heart

  • Mr. Carpathia

    Reply Reply August 9, 2013

    I would like to warn all men out there to ignore these so called “traditional” women!
    There aren’t any traditional women left in the west anymore. Don’t let them fool you.
    As soon as you put the ring on her finger and say, “I Do” she will change.
    Her latent contempt for all men will start to come to the surface as soon as you
    get married, and it will steadily get worse overtime.

    That’s why I’m going overseas to find a wife. Eastern Europe to be exact.
    Probably Romania or the Ukraine, because I know that I will find a truly traditional
    girl over there. But in the west? Especially “this country” forget about it!

    To bad though for American…..hmmm should I even use the word “women”?
    I guess they’ll just have to get used to living alone with their cats as more and more
    smart, young men like my self do a mass exodus to other countries for love and marriage.

    I kind of hate to say it but, Ladies, you brought this on yourselves, now you have to deal with it.

    • Anna

      Reply Reply August 9, 2013

      Although I think this is a hasty generalisation, as you cannot catagorise whole groups based on experiences you’ve had or seen with likely less than 1% of the target population.. I see your frustration here. I think your point has some validity, even as a woman I agree with you to an extent so I won’t argue, but all I’m saying is that it might be clouded by some anger on your part.

      • Mr. Carpathia

        Reply Reply August 9, 2013

        Anna, here’s some food for thought.

        You have to keep in mind that men are much more practical than women. This fact applies to all areas of life, including dating and relationships. With that said, you have to look at it coldly and scientifically just the way a man would.
        Pertaining to men going overseas for love and romance, look at it this way.
        How much time and effort is a man willing to invest in trying to find a suitable woman to marry?
        If a man’s goal is to find a genuinely traditional woman to marry and raise a family with, then he’d better be prepared to spend an exorbitant amount of time, energy, and money on his search.

        Traditional women are extremely rare in America these day’s. People say it’s comparable to looking for a needle in a haystack, but that would be a euphemism, it’s more like looking for the micro bacteria in a haystack.

        But a man can go overseas to a more traditional, family oriented country and find a suitable woman for marriage very quickly and easily.

        I’ll use a metaphor: Let’s say a man goes to the local market to buy milk, except it turns out that all the milk is sour. That doesn’t mean the man stop’s drinking milk, instead he simply goes to another market where the milk isn’t spoiled.

        It’s basically the same rational when a man decides to go to a different country to find a wife.
        He’s simply going to a different market where the women aren’t spoiled.
        He doesn’t have to spend year’s and year’s on end searching, instead he find’s what he’s looking for quickly and easily.

        With that said, maybe you ladies can better understand why so many men are opting for foreign girls, instead of the homegrown variety.

        • Anna

          Reply Reply August 9, 2013

          Hola!
          No, I’m definitely not knocking you for going to another market. I myself went to “another market”. But it’s not because of a generalization I made. He just happened to be from another country (it doesn’t matter which country, or which country I’m from for that matter). I’m just saying that you can’t stereotype people so broadly. But hey, if you like the milk at another market, then I’m happy you found great milk. Enjoy it!

        • Felicia

          Reply Reply August 25, 2013

          “Going to another market” as in going overseas to find a “suitable wife” makes sense at first glance. But, really in effect, many men are going where they can find enslaved underdeveloped women who are kept down so men can get them as easily as they can buy a fresh carton of milk. Will these women remain enslaved by marriage when they see the opportunities in America? Many will not. I totally support people finding a good match anywhere that they can. But, a man taking advantage of female exploitation abroad is why “smart women” are wise to not empower you as a man.That is why there was a woman’s movement. Even your slave wife will revolt from you in America when she learns she is not property. I recently met a business man in his late sixtes who bought a Filipino wife in her 20′s who has the maturation of a teenager. Yes, he gets a subservient wife and she gets citizenship. But, it is bridal trafficking. He still wishes he had an intellectual adult woman who was educated and can function well even though he is sexually enjoying his young attractive wife. So, him buying a GIRL to marry still does not satisfy his need for a woman. So, I do not feel any motivation to ‘step it up’ to keep a would be slave master husband from wife trafficking. It is actually pathetic.

  • John

    Reply Reply August 7, 2013

    I doubt that there is anything more than I HATE about being with a woman is when I detect the attitude that they “own” me . . . like a pet dog or cat. I’m willing to commit, but it’ll be a cold day in perdition before any woman owns me.

    • Anna

      Reply Reply August 9, 2013

      I get it. You want your freedom. You probably wouldn’t mind a great woman by your side, as long as you still feel like you’re your own man.That’s totally understandable, and you have a right to that.

      • Mr. Carpathia

        Reply Reply August 9, 2013

        Anna, Mr. Carpathia here again ,
        as you probably know, the founder of this site is Renee Wade,
        just out of curiosity, would you happen to know which east European country she’s from and when exactly she emigrated to the U.S.
        Maybe she could come to my house and eat pizza, I have Mr. Rogers Neighborhood on DVD.
        Ha Ha!

        • Anna

          Reply Reply August 9, 2013

          Haha gross!

    • Felicia

      Reply Reply August 25, 2013

      Why do men deliberately choose women who are a bad match, John. A lot of women don’t do that. But, you choose women who do and get angry. Maybe, by having those “I would commit but……” is just because you don’t really want to commit. You could just be honest about it and not pretend that the woman is too flawed to commit to.

      • Greg

        Reply Reply August 28, 2013

        But women always do that,
        the biggest female fantasy is that a man will change for her, its the ultimate sign he loves her.

  • Jim

    Reply Reply August 7, 2013

    the best way to go these days is to just live with someone that you really love instead of getting married to them, and i am going through a divorce right now myself which is very painful.

    • Felicia

      Reply Reply August 25, 2013

      Jim, my “fiance” felt we should shack up and me function life a wife because he was afraid to wed. He felt that as long as we love each other, it should not matter whether or not we had a ‘piece of paper.’ I left him because he would not commit even though he was asking for everything you get in a family. He was very hurt and angry and cruel to me because I refused to have an out of wed lock “family.” Why do men think they will get loyalty, devotion, and a lifetime of bliss from a “wife” without being a husband?

      • Anna C

        Reply Reply August 26, 2013

        PREACH!

      • Anna C

        Reply Reply August 26, 2013

        :)

      • Roy

        Reply Reply August 28, 2013

        “Why do men think they will get loyalty, devotion, and a lifetime of bliss from a “wife” without being a husband?”
        ===================================

        The reason is Felicia because that’s not what they tend to get. They either live in misery married or the wife financially shafts them legally in divorce court. Life long happily married couples are only a small percentage and an extreme risk for men.

        You have every right to terminate a relationship with a man who doesn’t want to marry if that’s non-negotiable for you and he had no right to be ‘hurt’ – but he is doing the only rational thing open to him and in his position any man with a brain would do the same.

        You will just have to find one of the stupid/ill-informed guys that doesn’t know about family court and the absurd risk he is running :-)

  • Alorian Demasque

    Reply Reply August 6, 2013

    This article misses the point. Look at marriage from a business perspective with an understanding of the statistics. 90% of divorces are initiated by women. 60% of the financial resources and assets normally go to the woman in the divorce proceedings. That means that most of the fruits of your labors as a male will go do the woman in the event of a divorce. This is one heck of a risk.

    Unfortunately, in the same breath, I *like* women. I love one in particular very dearly. However, marriage is just a raw deal for most men. My mother ended up initiating a divorce with my father… it was very painful for my brother, sister, and myself. Marriage carries with it an extreme risk.

  • Jasmin

    Reply Reply July 8, 2013

    Placing your children before your husband is a fatal error that most women make. I am convinced that this causes more men to cheat and leave than any other reason. Your hubby should ALWAYS be the top priority in your life. Not your kids, not your job. Jobs come and go. Children grow up and (hopefully) develop lives of their own. Husbands are meant to be by your side forever.

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      I like you attitude jasmine. The wife and the husband are the nucleus of the family. If that falls apart so does the family. This type understanding has been lost, in today’s western society. Thank you.

  • Holly

    Reply Reply June 29, 2013

    Hello Renee and David

    Another great enlightening read! I use to be an anti marridge person myself when I held the veiw in mind that marridge equates loss of freedom, boarding and restrictions.

    I now put that down to a 6 year controlled relationship and scary veiw of the world.

    Thankfully I’ve now witnessed with my own eye’s that good men really do egzist and that they are worth the effort.

    Most importantly I realize that no man should give me a time to come in when my friends are out socializing having fun. I’m aloud to wear makeup and a nice pair of shoes. Never to cut all my hair off and neglect my apperance because of a man shouting at me day in, day out.

    Thankfully things have got better since I walked from my ex 3.5 months ago.

    I refuse another relationship until I actually become a women of high value. Thankfully I’m on the right path and eventually I will become a person with a healthy veiw of the world.

    • Holly

      Reply Reply June 29, 2013

      …(3 years 5 months independantly living is what I meant).

      Every day is a working progress. I guess that in another 3 years time I’ll be ready to start a new kidney to finding a good man. Of course though , it’s important to find myself as a person to know what to look for.

      For the time being I want to enjoy as much as my own time and rescourses . I just want to enjoy focusing on myself and not giving anything away.

      Only when I’ve experienced a life of my own will I be happy to share myself.

  • VeryMuchRight

    Reply Reply June 19, 2013

    well these days there are not that many good women at all to choose from.

  • Roy

    Reply Reply June 13, 2013

    Lynn doesn’t seem happy that men have woken up to the fact that marriage is such an appalling deal for them – oh dear :-)

    As for older men, they are getting the message too I’m afraid Lynn :-)

    • Lynn

      Reply Reply June 13, 2013

      Thanks for proving my point, Roy!

      • Roy

        Reply Reply June 13, 2013

        You are most welcome Lynn :-)

  • Lynn

    Reply Reply June 12, 2013

    The majority of the male commenters on this site are sick and are discouraging me from reading the comments. To suggest the average woman has totalitarian ‘power’ -in any aspect of life- in a patriarchal world is absolutely crazy. I’m glad that I’m a 37 year-old woman who looks 25; I have the ability to date (slightly older) men from previous eras who recognize and rejoice in their abiltiy to perform traditional male relationship functions like provide for me.

    Young ladies, I feel sorry for you. At this point I can see why more of you would want to date older men. Men in this generation are pathetic shadows to their forefathers. Always whining about their possessions being at risk. Real men worry more about providing important benefits to their offspring and mates, such as the protections that are inherent with being born of legitimate marriage and formalizing lifelong unions with a marriage contract. Marriage provides benefits that lasts for generations! Much longer than a sports car, expensive vacations, hair transplant procedures, etc. that these men worry about losing out on……..
    http://sojournerspassport.com/you-betta-recognize-thats-its-far-better-to-be-a-divorced-mother-than-a-never-married-mother-with-out-of-wedlock-children/

    • Lynn

      Reply Reply June 12, 2013

      Extra advice for this sorry current generation of men:
      http://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/30/the-case-for-marriage/

    • Jasmin

      Reply Reply July 8, 2013

      Thank you, Lynn. They sure don’t make men like they used to. There must be something in the water. I got one of the last of the good ones! Actually, there is some research that indicates that young males today are less masculine and have lower testosterone levels. That whole metrosexual thing is depressing. Hmmmmm. Mantyhose? Makeup for men? Both apparently available and selling to today’s “man.” Sites abound with advice on “How to be an Alpha Male.” I guess the gene that allows men to figure this out by themselves and with the help of their dads has gone the way of the dodo. They are all over the manosphere, spreading their bitter misogyny around like the Black Plague.

      I assume that these guys just want to spend their entire lives flitting from flower to flower, looking for a, photoshopped vision of barely legal perfection. Whatever will they do when their inevitable pot belly and balding heads appear? They will probably have perfected the Swedish Robot woman by then, so these guys won’t have to grow old alone. The ability to love, commit to and MARRY one human being who loves you is a gift that every person should experience. Real men are able and willing to commit to the right woman. Real men support their children without complaining, even when the marriage doesn’t work out. People today think that their lives must be constantly exciting, like reality TV or some video game. I truly feel sorry for young women today. Many will never have what I have known; true love and a long marriage from a man who cherishes me. We women are responsible for some of this. In the We have accepted this selfish, boorish, eternal frat boy, porn culture driven behavior.

      • Roy

        Reply Reply July 9, 2013

        “Actually, there is some research that indicates that young males today are less masculine and have lower testosterone levels.”
        ==========================================

        This is the typical misandrist comment you get from women when they don’t like the result of their own actions.

        The truth is quite simple, feminism in general and its effect on laws (e.g. family court during divorce, the attempts to portray DV as a one way street) has meant that men have looked at marriage and realised it is an absolutely appalling deal for them. So MGTOW is growing every year.

        Women have created this, and both genders end up suffering as a result, so now they should stop whining and live with it.

        • Paul

          Reply Reply July 30, 2013

          I love women and am single and also have three single brothers all who are getting along on age like me. We know the system and the game. One sided kangaroo family law courts and a culture that does not value a working man’s contribution. And for that reason, as they say on the Dragons Den tv show – “I’m out!”.

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      Spoken like women who has not yet experiences divorce. I am that traditional Man, of yesteryear married 30 years,. Faithful to the end, never forgetting my vows. Providing everything for my wife and my children. Until the day, the x decides she want a divorce. Man risk everything, I will never get married again. Its truly not worth it. If i was to do it over again, i would still have children but not a wife.

  • Latesha

    Reply Reply April 22, 2013

    The fruit is even a wise alternative to laxatives for anyone experiencing constipation.
    There is no guideline provided as to what you can and cannot eat for lunch,
    dinner, and snacks. Otherwise, you can replace the lukewarm water with a cup of milk, or even
    a bowl of cereal with milk.

  • taxexile

    Reply Reply April 7, 2013

    In other words, continue to fool him until the ring is permanent.

  • stacey

    Reply Reply April 1, 2013

    What do you want? A housewife (many don’t because she’s not bringing in money she’s not doing anything), or a career women (which many don’t because then she can’t be a housewife and take care of the house like a stay at home wife). You can’t have both, there is not enough hours in the day.

    What it seems that men want is a friend with benefits wife. We meet up and have sex, but my money is mine, and well your money it goes towards bills because the male works so hard and it’s not fair that his money pays for things in the house or things he doesn’t really want like appliances, knick knacks that make things a home, but if the marriage is over if she leaves with anything she took everything. You don’t want a working women because she’s too independent, but if she is a stay at home wife who cleans, and takes care of the house she’s lazy because she doesn’t work. What you forget is that in these 3rd world countries it seems these men take care of the women (although I’m not even sure about that anymore).

    As for marrying these women why do you think they are marrying you?!? You probably treat them a hell of a lot better than their native men. A lot of these women have no rights, you damned right they’re going to marry an American man. There are a lot of times no options for these usually poor women, America is the golden ticket. Honestly I think that quite a few White Western women are spoiled they are expected to be treated like queens and princesses. Some will marry for monetary gain, which a lot of other races don’t have the luxury of having (with some of them having to work because the men of the same race can’t get jobs at times) I bet you wouldn’t see an Indian woman, Latina woman, or African-American woman reaping these “taking men to the cleaners” benefit. Hell most African American women aren’t married because the men aren’t marrying them, or marrying other races.

    From last I checked both western spouses have to work to afford a certain lifestyle. I wish people died in their 50′s and 60′s like they did decades ago because by the time these problems came up one of you has a foot in the grave anyway.

  • jamie

    Reply Reply March 30, 2013

    Well I came here looking for advice but unfortunately I didn’t find any that works for me. Not that others wouldn’t benefit from this advice. But I’ve been doing what you suggested for 13 years and all it did was make my husband act like a helpless child who became incapeable of even washing a dish. He will even throw trash around an overflowing garbage can until I get there to take care of it. I spend 13 years doing what HE needed and it got me nowhere. No good education, worked for him and that just meant I worked all the time and him never. As much as I did for him I was never good enough and he became more and more like an infant the more I took on and did for him. Now we hate each other. I’m damned either way with him. If I wait for him to take a shower first so he can have hot water he complains I should have gotten up 2 hours early to do it so I could have a shower first and he would have how water. So If I take the shower first then he complains I didn’t leave enough hot water. I can get up at 6, help kids with getting ready come and clean, go to work for him till 11pm and come home and he’s got trash overflowing and dishes piled up while he was home all day and night with no kids there till 5. I’ve doted on him and made him a priority and all I got was a third child (him) and non stop argument when aren’t exactly right. Oh yeah throw some mental and physical abuse in there to. As for keeping up my appearance, like I said I’m up at 6 and at work from 8AM -11 PM and those 2 hours in the morning is for waking up 2 kids, making breakfast, making lunch, cleaning, homework helping, school dropping and drive to work. Not a whole lot of time to work out when you are not home till 11 and up again at 6 – all while he was at home doing nothing.

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      I feel sorry for you, I did the same thing. I brought home the beacon, and fried it up in a pan, too. I worked, and cleaned and shopped, laundry up the woo-zoo. On top of a 90 hour work week. Plus I had 4 kids to take care of, in two different households. Oh I am a man, my wife never worked not even at home. Just went out and had fun, and spent the money I made. She instantiated the divorce. She cheat on me. She stop having sex for 4 1/2 years before I was kick out of my home, and taken my kids away.Oh I never cheated either, in all that time. As well as 60 % of my assets, that I have worked over 30 years to create. My Children are gone, I only see them once a week, because their mother is not honoring court order child visitation. Which the courts do nothing to enforce, but if I stop Child support I will go to jail. Not to mention alimony, and force to sell my business. I am now, without a job. Look at a future of poverty without my home business, and my children. Never Again Will I Maria an American Women. Oh I am American Man. Their are Millions of me’s out their stuck in the aftermath of a divorce. To All Men, Don’t Get Married, They change once the wedding ring gets on their finger. Truth.

      • Carl

        Reply Reply August 28, 2013

        Marriage is the enslavement of Men.

  • Riley

    Reply Reply February 17, 2013

    7/10 Western women are simply impossible to marry. They have no self respect, they have no skills in either the traditional role of housework nor the skills of house maintenance slash repair. Very little have conversational skills beyond vapid subjects such as celebrity or local gossip. Very few keep themselves healthy or in shape after High School, let alone when they have careers and are married. And out of the 30% left whom it might be possible to marry (merely possible, not being the ideal) they are taken, shut ins, mentally ill, etc.

    Speaking from personal observation, the majority of men I am acquainted with work hard jobs that they often do not like, keep themselves physically healthy, save their money, have college or university degrees in viable subjects, are monogamous in relationships and for the few studs (in shape, nice looking, charming) they have had sex with less then fifteen women by the age of twenty-three. And to boot most of them have been living on their own for several years – so they have good knowledge of house keeping skills, cooking, etc.

    The women are opposite to almost a one. Mind you, I’m not calling them down, many are my friends, but they are impossible to date let alone marry. Many are out of shape (and this is ubiquitous amongst many young women – go to the gym and compare the sex ratios), most have debt without working a job or forgoing their fun times to manage it, their university degrees are nearly all in the Arts and mostly Majoring in the oh so useful fields of Psychology, Philosophy, Communications and Sociology. Percentage wise, off the top of my head, at least 50-60% have admitted to cheating on their boyfriends at some point, meaning the real numbers would be 60-80%. Most cannot stay in a relationship, even if the man is nice and caring and when asked why they left it just ‘wasn’t working out’, even though they’re dating a similar man within two weeks who’s major difference is looks or finances or novelty. And finally the grotesque fact that several of them have admitted to having sex with more then fifteen men (majority of the women I know being within the 18-28 bracket). Which, again, due to shame means that the numbers are undoubtedly much higher. And few have lived on their own; most have room mates, have moved in with boyfriends, live in residence (University dorms) and have never had to clean up after themselves, or simply do not know how or are unmotivated to do so.

    To help pay for my schooling, I work at a nightclub. The things women do there are absolutely foul. And it’s not a core group of 30-40. Yes, it takes two to tango, but the vast majority of encounters I’ve seen were initiated and perpetrated by the woman.

    So by the time one of my friends enters his marrying phase in their late twenties, he’ll at most (and this is extreme) have had sex with ten to twenty different girls. He’ll have a nest egg saved up, minimal debt and be more then ready to settle down. He’ll have a good job and useful home skills. There are two women I know personally whom I can honestly say the same thing about.

    Is it any wonder why men don’t want to grab the short stick?

    If women want to marry a good, hard working, useful, honest and monogamous man then they better get those qualities themselves. There are too many young men who are aware of the way they’re being manipulated, and it’s never been easier to marry outside of your country or hook up with women to fulfill your sexual desires. I imagine the next few decades are going to see a massive amount of Cougars and Spinsters in the Western world.

    /endrant

  • Henry

    Reply Reply January 22, 2013

    Wow. Yes.

    Thank you for understanding and articulating our needs/desires/values surrounding a woman correctly.

    I live in North Florida, late-20s; never-married and put-together. Please send one of your readers my way :)

  • Mark

    Reply Reply December 31, 2012

    to finish what i was saying, they should go to church to pray and thank GOD very much for having a life. it is very amazing how rotten GOD could be to many of us good people, and takes more care of the bad ones. then we have the women that go after men with a very large bank account, and such losers they are.

  • Mark

    Reply Reply December 31, 2012

    i am a straight man that had been married myself at one time before she cheated on me, and i was a very caring and loving husband that was very committed to her as well. i was certainly the one woman man at the time, knowing what i had at home and did not have to go out looking for it anymore. i would love to get married again, if i can only meet the right woman to have a relationship with to see where it can lead too. i am one of so many men that hates being alone and single again, especially with most of my friends that were very fortunate to have met the love of their life and have a family today. when i go out now, i seem to meet so many low life loser women with a very bad attitude problem that are so very hard to start a normal conversation with. i can’t blame myself, since many women nowadays have become so very nasty and are not really looking to meet men anymore like they once did. women have certainly changed over the years, and many women years ago were much easier to meet and were very committed to their men too. there are certainly a lot more women that are into other women that i have really noticed, adding to the problem. this seems to be without a doubt a new trend that much more women prefer other women over us, and with these very disgusting women around just makes it worse for us serious men. i do blame these type of women because i have been cursed at by many women that i would try to talk too, and they will tell me to leave them alone and threaten to call the police on me. so you can see what i mean by so many low life loser women, and all the good ones are married now. i do blame GOD for creating so many people like them that are everywhere these days. the very fortunate men and women that have one another and their families, should really go to church and pray and

  • bobo

    Reply Reply November 4, 2012

    As a 25 year old male i completely agree with being afraid of losing assets. I work very hard for everything I have. I have been with the same girl for 4 years and I honestly love this girl and I am sure I will spend the rest of my life with her but marrige worries me because of the pressure put on it. My girl seems to think marrige would change or relationship and make it better. This worries me because what happens when nothing changes, does she get resentfull? She is not a mean girl but if you put that kind of pressure on something and it doesnt have that magical spark how could you keep from being resentfull of life in general. And I beleive that beleif is what truely ruins relationships and makes many women mean. I know what I would expect from marrige and it is pretty much to be the way we are now, which would be awesome I work with all my strength and love with all my heart though good and bad. But marrige because of the ideas about it seems foolish and not worth the hassle.

    • Jasmin

      Reply Reply July 8, 2013

      Don’t waste 4 years of a young woman’s life if she wants marriage and you do not. If I were her I would have left you by now.

  • mjay

    Reply Reply October 18, 2012

    http://web.archive.org/web/20100209024035/http://themenscenter.com/busterb/dont_get_married.htm

    http://web.archive.org/web/20100203224454/http://themenscenter.com/busterb/inpraise.htm

    “Men helped open up the workplace to women when they demanded it. Men even changed the workplace to make it better than it had ever been when it was only men working. Men introduced new laws to accommodate women in the workplace. A good number of us learned to cook, and even more of us took up scrub brushes and pails of Pine-Sol to help with the cleaning. We learned to do laundry and ironing. We learned to change diapers and how warm the milk should be before baby gets it. Many of us now know more about looking after a home than many women.

    After all of this, we get sneering disrespect from junior secretaries who have trouble cooking pasta. Then, when they get tired of us, they divorce us and take the kids, the house, and the car the way their grandmothers did.

    If I sound depressed by this modern condition, I am. If I sound nostalgic for the Fifties, I’m not particularly. You see, my dream had always been to marry a woman who made good money. I love cooking; I love kids; I enjoy decorating although I’m not that good at it; I can take or leave cleaning, but I did it for twenty years so I could do it for sixty more without much problem; I can also take a passable crack at repairing a car engine and I can climb ladders and move heavy furniture, which is more than the fabled Fifties housewife could do. I can also, in a pinch, make good money.

    Neither am I alone. I have a friend on my sports team who brings cakes and squares after every practice. I have another good friend who does prize-winning needlepoint. A lot of my male friends are single and although, as I’ll freely admit, some of their places are strictly utilitarian, others would surprise you with their tasteful decor. There are still a few “Neanderthal” men out there, but there are also a lot, like me, who have grown up self-sufficient, tidy, and capable in the home.

    After all of this, I find that I look around at the single women I know, and I shudder. I listen to them giggling about how stupid and useless men are, and it makes me glad that I can take care of myself. Women think that they have finally arrived at a place where they don’t need men any more. They can make their own money, and modern technology makes much of men’s strengths and skills obsolete. However, I have news for those women who think that this gives them a leg up on us men: many of us don’t need you, either. We can cook, clean, and look after ourselves.

    For men like me, the only remaining reason to start an intimate relationship with a woman is her personality.

    Which is why so many of us are single.”

  • Dan

    Reply Reply September 14, 2012

    Renee, have u checked out a website called RooshV.com which is run by a PUA (pick up artist) Roosh. He has wrote some articles on how the downsides of feminism have destroyed femininity in many western countries and shows how nonwestern (Eastern European, Asian, South American) women are more feminine. Here are some articles I suggest u read on his website.

    “Western Culture Poisons Women” http://www.rooshv.com/western-culture-poisons-women
    “7 Ways Feminism Is Destroying American Women” http://www.rooshv.com/7-ways-feminism-is-destroying-american-women
    “13 Personality Traits Of Polish Women” http://www.rooshv.com/13-personality-traits-of-polish-women
    “42 Things Wrong With American Women” http://www.rooshv.com/42-things-wrong-with-american-women

    • Jasmin

      Reply Reply July 8, 2013

      Roosh is. perfect example of a woman hating manosphere blog. Another gem is the racist, misogynistic Chateau Heartiste.

  • darknile

    Reply Reply September 12, 2012

    No matter how it seems, marriage is always ALWAYS going to be a 2 sided effort. The man should not ignore the woman and the woman should not ignore the man. People have to be conscious of their relationship and how what they say and do to their partner affects that relationship. My woman was feeling quite aroused one day while I was dead asleep at 4 in the morning and even though I wasn’t in the mood myself I took responsibility to appease her emotional state at the time. The fact is in marriage there will be things you don’t want to do, but just like work, children, life, etc you have to pull up your boot straps and GIVE IT YOUR BEST. Yes women want to feel loved, but so do men. Raising children is the responsibility of BOTH parents and both parents have to take part in building their childs character and perception of what a proper relationship should be in the first place.

    If you look at a woman (or man) and know their faults as well as whether or not you can cope with their bad points without trying to “change” them. True love means that each person knows themselves (and their faults) and are willing to try to improve themselves for their partner. Its been working out quite well for me and my lady and when something is bothering us we take time to communicate what is wrong.

  • Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c)

    Reply Reply September 8, 2012

    Renee,
    marriage is a BAD DEAL for men. A VERY BAD DEAL. Try reading my book on my divorce.

    When a man who has a stellar career gets a BILL for USD60,000 our of 25 years of labour and EVERYONE SAYS THIS IS OK you have to ask why men will not marry?

    And yes. Women are cruel and vicious in using our love for them as weapons against us. No one told me how despicable women could be before I was married. No one.

    As one friend of mine said. If men were told the truth about women before marriage no lads would marry. Now that The Truth Be Told is starting to make waves, which will become a Tsunami, the ball is in the court of women in the west. You either lift your game or we will destroy even the idea of a commitment or a relationship between men and women.

    I teach lads to have “relaxionships”. While the woman is relaxing to be with, fine. The minute she is no longer relaxing? Get rid of her and get a new one. You women dump husbands of long standing for no reason at all…so don’t be whining that us men are telling lads to dump women who are aggravating them.

    The #1 piece of advice I give men is to leave the west and move to germany or further east. There they do not have to deal with bad women nearly so often.

    http://www.mensbusinessassociation.com/LinkClick.aspx?fileticket=hNKVd0Hr7bU%3d&tabid=753&mid=1703

    • Jessica

      Reply Reply September 11, 2012

      Man you’re one jaded man… I know a really good relationship therapist in Sydney if you need it..

      http://www.andreahaas.com/ she does relationships not just sex.

      Let me know how you go and Good Luck.

      • Roy

        Reply Reply June 2, 2013

        Jessica,
        Peter may have gone over the top, but fundamentally he is right in saying there is nothing in marriage for us. The marriage contract has one real practical value in current times – when the relationship goes wrong it can be used as a legal contract to redistribute wealth, and as in family court the woman almost always gets custody of children that means 90%+ of the time that means taking the man’s wealth and giving it to the woman.
        Where kids are involved she will typically get 55-65% of the assets and then he has part of his wages given to her – sometimes for decades !

        The worst part of it all is if the woman won’t let the man see his children the courts will talk about it but will refrain from actually doing anything.

        I’ve never heard of “relaxionships” but it is a very sensible way to proceed for men. I like women (sometimes love them) but I won’t marry one because it’s nuts – I don’t have a single friend who won’t quietly advise me to avoid it – I’ve asked them.

  • Good morning

    Reply Reply May 26, 2012

    Interesting article I’m a 35 year old man, grad degree, high income, body builder, assets, and unmarried. The article by the two Rutgers prof titled are men on a marriage strike, did a fairly good job of explaining a mans point of view in my opinion. They provided some interesting data and the consequences of the state of marriage in today’s society. Life is good

  • mary89

    Reply Reply August 31, 2011

    I have a question about this part:
    “Do not deny him sex regularly and do not use it as a commodity …..Don’t do it hoping it will be over soon.”
    I think no one is always in the mood.So how a woman can do it (to avoid him feel rejected) & be passionate at the time when she doesn’t feel like it?

    • Kitt

      Reply Reply September 1, 2011

      Allow him the chance to get you in the mood; fill your mind with loving thoughts and try to give him the best experience you can create— do it for him and with this mindset, if he is trying to get you in the mood, he can’t lose.

    • tchotchke

      Reply Reply December 28, 2013

      When you’re not in the mood, give him a blow job

  • JJJ

    Reply Reply August 31, 2011

    Easy, modern women generally make terrible wives. Most of them prioritize their careers above their men. While a “career” represents some sort of fulfilling self-actualizing phenomenon for women, a career is a job to most men–men must work or we get no respect, no girls, nothing.

    So why would a man, who must work hard and hold responsibility as men, marry a woman who won’t appreciate his efforts?

    It’s no wonder why more and more US men are looking abroad for traditional women.

    • Diana

      Reply Reply May 8, 2012

      I’m quite surprised at the many negative comments from men on this page.
      Yes, you are entitled to your opinions.
      However, most of the women here are here because they would like to learn how to become more feminine and more loving, so I find that these comments which complain about how “modern women generally make terrible wives” are quite unecessary, and a little nasty.

      • J

        Reply Reply May 26, 2012

        Yeah, a lot of men have been through lots of nasty experiences with the modern woman. Now that some women are catching on and realizing the drudgery of working a career, many of them want to be “traditional” again.

        To us smarter men, we think these women just want to avoid working and have an easy life of being a homemaker. After all, the divorce laws and family courts favor women anyway.

        How can a modern woman lose? She can’t 95% of the time.

        • epc

          Reply Reply May 30, 2012

          i been through this with a women in the divorce,its not even funny anymore.feminism is nothing but control over the men nowadays,look at a woman the wrong way today and watch how fast you can be arrested,its called mini rape,its bs!

      • Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c)

        Reply Reply September 8, 2012

        Diana,
        “I’m quite surprised at the many negative comments from men on this page.”

        Why would you call the truth “negative”? Why are you surprised the men are speaking up?

        Marriage and divorce are the HOTTEST issue in the world of men because divorce is total disaster for a man and no women even care about talking about it.

    • epc

      Reply Reply May 30, 2012

      you got that right!todays women are hateful as ever,will never marry a usa woman again.

      • michael

        Reply Reply September 4, 2012

        Never marry an Australian one either.

        • Greg

          Reply Reply August 26, 2013

          Dont bother with Kiwi ones either, the top 5% of guys get all the action,
          n being a career criminal and thug puts you high on the list with the rest.
          My two brothers have im, and are being worked to death.
          I’l outlive them by 2 decades+

    • kyle

      Reply Reply January 23, 2013

      A writer and blogger named “fred” whose blog is “fredoneverything” says that marrying 2nd and 3rd world women is the way to go. His point of view is interesting.

  • Summer

    Reply Reply July 20, 2011

    I thought this question has become a legend ;-) Men are not marrying because they afraid the women they married turn to become someone else they don’t even know! In their mind they afraid that after married, they will not as happy as when he is single and the American law sure has scare them much. But if they can sure that the women they love will still the same (at least they still find the good and positive result from trade the freedom with happiness) and the passion and love is still remain, I guess they want to marry and take the risk with the law. Just my simple opinion :)

  • NoThanx

    Reply Reply July 20, 2011

    It’s really simple. Men are not marrying because the risk is not nearly worth the reward. The chances are great that you could lose your house, your assets, your income, and your children to a woman who poisons your own children against you. To top it off, he loses the lions share of his income for the next two decades to his ex wife, and therefore cannot save for retirement, that is if he can manage to stay out of debtor’s prison. When he finally comes out from under the debt burden in his mid 40′s, it’s too late to save for retirement. The chances are better than even that he will live most of his adult life, and die, in poverty, while his own children are systematically poisoned against him. This is not the exception in the US today, this scenario is the norm. No matter how independent, beautiful, and wonderful she may be, nothing is worth that risk.

    • Liza

      Reply Reply July 27, 2011

      Wow.. How sad you’ve been made to feel this way! Even when there is a divorce what you’ve described is not necessarily the rule. I think it depends on the company you keep often times.

      Addressing the child issue: I know lots of amicable divorces where, though not the ideal situation for the children, the women do not poison their children against their fathers. I was one of those, yet my husband abandoned his children when he had full opportunity to be involved in their lives. He also never paid a dime in child support and not for a lack of my needing the income.

      Unfortunately, I see it from another perspective having now two adult males living with me in their 20′s and I being much older. Yes, this is my son and his friend. My son does not have children but his friend has 5. He regularly complains about paying child support. Here’s the thing.. if you have any idea of the cost of raising a child, in most cases it’s far more than you’d realize. I had to find out the hard way myself. The custodial parent (no longer always the mother) is often awarded barely a fair share of the financial burden and all of the mental, physical and emotional burden in many cases (I will not state this to be the “rule” but it does happen). The custodial parent isn’t in most cases sacking away a ton of money for retirement either! Trust me!! My biggest complaint is that support needs to be mandated by a court system in the first place. If you’re old enough to make the child, you should be mature enough to make sure that his or her needs are supplied in all areas even IF you were the ONLY one supporting that child if it takes EVERY cent you earn and you live in the streets. Sex produces children (in case someone hasn’t figured that out) and whether you’re married or not the scenario you described CAN apply to anyone, male or female. So if you’re going to make the baby, you must be willing to happily live with whatever consequences it takes to support that child adequately whether it’s a good or bad situation. You don’t want to do that.. don’t sleep with someone in the first place.

      AND might I add… a piece of paper won’t change that. Marriage and babies are not a joined issue you can have either without the other so that’s no reason not to get married.

      Just my thoughts.

      • Kevin

        Reply Reply July 27, 2011

        Yes, it is precisely the reason a man should not get married. Marriage is a scam.

        Go project your feminist bullschnitzle somewhere else.

        • Diana

          Reply Reply May 8, 2012

          Hey Kevin – I understand that you have a right to your own opinion, but I think it was a bit unnecessary to tell Liza to “go project your feminist bullschnitzle somewhere else,” she was just giving her own perspective on divorce and child custody.
          I think it’s nice that we’ve got a man’s view (‘No Thanx’) and a woman’s view (Liza) on the same issue, it makes for interesting reading.

        • epc

          Reply Reply May 30, 2012

          lol,love this site,its going to get interesting!

      • Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c)

        Reply Reply September 8, 2012

        Liza Reply:
        July 27th, 2011 at 9:11 am
        Wow.. How sad you’ve been made to feel this way!

        Liza..dont try your “how sad crap” in public when I am around. If you women were at all sad you would be speaking out on behalf of men…but you LAUGH at men who have had their children stolen.

        I have been HATED ON for nearly FIVE YEARS by men and women alike. For TWO YEARS I patiently offered women the change to join in re-introducing the rule of law into Australia and Ireland. They refused to. I dropped ALL BUT ONE female friend I had pre divorce I was so disgusted in their behaviour.

        Western women are hate filled shrews in the main. Eastern european women are MUCH nicer.

        So no…we do not believe your lies about how “sad” you are for us. We seek justice and we seek equality before the law and women are fighting against that every step of the way.

        Well? Your hypocrisy is exposed in my work and that work is now rolling out.

      • Jon

        Reply Reply December 31, 2012

        The fundamental issue lies in the feminist-influenced court system that favors women.

      • Roy

        Reply Reply June 11, 2013

        “Even when there is a divorce what you’ve described is not necessarily the rule.”
        ==========================================================

        I’m sorry but it pretty much is, that is how family court is set up, the only way the guy gets a reasonable deal is if the woman asks her solicitor to go really easy on him – i.e. he is at her mercy – and that very rarely happens. Once you get to divorce both sides tend to go for what they can get, and she can get a LOT.

      • Carl

        Reply Reply August 28, 2013

        Sorry to hear about your kids without a father. unfortunately it is the norm now. Mothers do poison there kids, not all my realize it. On some subconscious level they do. Poverty is the state of divorce on both sides of the equation. But most of the blame, subconsciously or consciously goes to the father. Even thou most divorces are initiated by the wife, the mother. Marriage to women, especially after a divorce is asking a man to go back into a building an institution that already destroyed him, and his family. I am seeing a women whom is the love of my life now. She wants a traditional marriages she has been divorce once, and so have I. I personally have been raked over the coals in my divorce as well as my marriage. She my x cheated on me, with out any consequences. Most women, not all do better in a divorce then they started with before they where married. My new lady does not want to sign a prenuptial s Why? Because she is looking for future security, aka money. This is the state of affairs of marriage and divorce. There little rational for man to get married these days. As you can see from the responses of men out there. What went wrong, many-things. Traditional roles are gone, and the rises of feminism. .Simplistically put their are no more We. It is all about I, want. A shared dream, is gone. Its the end of traditional marriage as we know it. We want equality, in a unequal world, at times without the responsibilities that go along with it. What is needed is a true equal rights amendment to the constitution of the united states. That will once and for all level the playing field, for marriage, traditional or non traditional to exist. Only then will men, decide to get married again. For newbies that want to get married, sign a prenuptial as an insurances to help the transition into marriage. Men don’t get married with out one. If you do, you going to regret it.

    • Kealia

      Reply Reply August 1, 2011

      I really am sorry you feel this way. I guess my husband and I are the exception to the rule. We’ve been together for 15 years, have one child and are doing great. We cling to one another because we both share the vision of growing old together and being HAPPY. This means having loyalty and respect for one another. We are disgusted with the current state of society, which is very “anti-family” and pro-materialism. Money will never buy happiness. Loving relationships are the key to happiness. There are great women out there that absolutely love their men for their CHARACTER, not their money and I am one of them. I hope you find someone absolutely lovely, that appreciates you for you.

      • Zamiis

        Reply Reply August 18, 2012

        Dear Kealia,
        First, congs for being the first – at least on this page (IF NOT ONLY ONE) to make marriage as enjoyable as you put it. I have no reason to not believe your words. As a researcher, I would certainly be open to new ideas and I believe “Happy marriage” is a theory worth discourse. What would a happy marriage look like? If you feel happy in marriage does it mean your partner to is? Does the silence of gunfire mean security or absence of violence equal to peace? And for that matter does living together for 15years explain that it was ALL “happiness”?

        As I said earlier, I’ve not a reason to doubt your words (and honestly wish all best), however, as a divorced father, I seem to sympathize with “NoThanxs” comments above. Again as a researcher, I’ve heard a number of voices sharing the same view of marriage as “NoThanxs”. I would add that I think women take divorce/separation personal and tend to have that unending hatrade….

    • Mark

      Reply Reply June 26, 2013

      Brilliant Comment!………This is exact truth! Notice that none of the Femi-Nazis here want to hear that?….they would rather ‘shame’ us…..today’s “modern women” are a pathetic joke! But,we get the last laugh.Take a look around and see how many ‘single’ women are out there.Take a look at any dating website……kinda of wants you to keep the suicide hotline on speed dial.

      • Greg

        Reply Reply August 26, 2013

        Traditionally women were just to look after the household, pass on the mans name in breeding,
        that was the reward. Nowadays with equality all that just leaves is sex to share in.
        So why get married just to have sex, its never free and always comes with a price,
        women always put a price on sex, for most its a means to a relationship.
        Few relationships are ever mutually beneficial.

  • The duke from Italy

    Reply Reply June 10, 2011

    We live in a society where all seems to be like the other, it’s too difficoult to be what we really are..

    The results is that we live our stereotype lives without being truly ourself..

    So the basic of this article is right, only being really what we are is the only way to meet someone special, if not, we will get a lot of Mr/Mrs Mistakes.. since people believe we are just as others and talk with us the same way he used to talk to others just 3 minutes before..

    Im a man and i wish to tell you my opinion.. a man would meet a mother, a friend and a lover, all this in the same woman, today it’s very easy to find this qualities.. but in differents women..

    a mother: yes.. if she is caring, loving, in a few words like a mother, men feel she will be the right one where finally he may drop his little peter pan in his heart and she will be a good mother also for childrens..also a mother, think about our mothers, at the qualities she has.. men once where child so they knew a lot about a mother’s love.. so they will consider you as the mother only if you have the right qualities that lies in a mother! now try to look at those modern women..they are selfish.. they always offend men dignity using their sexy body to lure their attenction but gives nothing.. they offend men as they all are like peter pan.. yeah we are! because we once used to be child, and we will looking for a woman who REALLY LIKES CHILD! like our mothers! so only those women are able to rise our babies with the real love they deserve.. taking care of our “peter pan” side!

    a friend: a friend, a truly friend, will never, and i say NEVER betray you, never.. a friend never judge you, never try to change you, a friend simply likes the way YOU ARE, a friend don’t try to ruin your life, on the other hand a friend try to help and make your life better, a friend is someone who can hold secret and are ready to help you in the middle of the night, share feelings without seems he is judging you, a friend is someone who understand you since a friend knows about life and knows sometimes you will do the same for a truly friend, a friend may be also rude when is the right time but never let you down, never left you alone stranded in your problems.. now try to see all this and other valours that truly friendship means in a modern woman..ok.. don’t waste your time..

    a lover: now read and repeat as a mantra: MEN NEED SEX! ok.. now repeat 10 times.. well.. so now you know that man need sex! it doesn’t matter if is a friend, your husband.. a true lover is that woman who knows that HIS man need sex.. and don’t use his sexuality for other reasons, and she “play” with him to find every day the joy to do sex for your pleasure.. but keep in mind that since men, as women, can have the milk without the cow, if you want to become his “cow”, you should also keep in mind the 2 point before.

    And the last tip about this situation:

    Actually, men doesn’t want to marry women due uneven laws in case of divorce, no peter pan problems, no immaturity issues, unfaithful women, alimnony and uneven laws are the reasons why men today understood marriage is not a good deal anymore. why spend so much money to make everybodies happy but you? men are finally aware of the situation, on what’s going on and get themself, each days, more wise!

    • tchotchke

      Reply Reply December 28, 2013

      My experience with American men is that they are so obsessed with pornography that they have become barely able to meet their woman’s sexual needs. Men are withholding sex from women as well.

  • John

    Reply Reply June 3, 2011

    Want to get married? Avoid American women or marry someone in your social/economic circle.

  • Kevin

    Reply Reply May 22, 2011

    The presumption of paternity: If she cheats on you and gets pregnant, she can divorce you, get alimony and child support for a kid that’s not even yours.

    No fault divorce: THERE IS NO COMMITMENT IN MARRIAGE ANYMORE! Either party can split for any reason at all.

    Alimony: She can leave you (no fault) and still take your future earnings, even though it was her choice to leave.

    I have a profound respect for happily married couples that borders on hero worship. But the LEGAL ramifications of marriage as they exist today are, to a man, a game of Russian roulette, but with 5 bullets rather than one.

    I will never get married. I would love to love a woman for the rest of my life, but I’m not stupid enough to enable her to destroy my life through her own malice or lack of judgment. And then get paid for it!

    No. Frikkin. Way!

    • Kealia

      Reply Reply August 1, 2011

      “There is no commitment in marriage anymore.”

      Kevin, yes there is. Not everyone is the same and some women don’t want to live without their life partners.

      • Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c)

        Reply Reply September 8, 2012

        Kealia…no there is not. A woman can kick the man out for NO REASON AT ALL and destroy everything he has ever worked for as was my case.

        In my case my wife even bragged about how she made up false allegations and slander against me so as to be able to paint me out to be a bad husband…this is a woman who was BEGGING ME TO TAKE HER BACK 6 months earlier…she even BEGGED ME TO TAKE HER BACK after we agreed to divorce….so she went from BEGGING ME TO TAKE HER BACK to “I was abused the whole 18 years I was married” in the space of ONE MONTH.

        Her father and son told her to withdraw her lies and slander but she wouldn’t.

        People REFUSED to believe so many men report their criminal abuse in the courts so I have released ALL the court documents in my case and even the video of my court meeting in Australia. I was threatened with JAIL and I told the judge I would kill him if he jailed me. So I was never jailed. This link is the book that shows lads what divorce is REALLY like. The TRUTH.

        You women who keep lying about divorce would do well to read it to. It is a damning indictment on you women. You women can start to co-operate with me or not. But I will keep denouncing western women with all my strength for as long as I can. That is what it is going to take it seems as you women do NOT want to admit the truth.

        There is NO commitment in marriage.

        Women destroyed marriage.

        http://www.mensbusinessassociation.com/LinkClick.aspx?fileticket=hNKVd0Hr7bU%3d&tabid=753&mid=1703

    • Diana

      Reply Reply May 8, 2012

      Um, Kevin – in terms of “The presumption of paternity” – you can have a paternity test if you really think it necessary . . . it can be presented as evidence in court . . .

      • Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c)

        Reply Reply September 8, 2012

        Diana,
        in many countries like USA and Ireland the paternity test is irrelevant. Even if the baby is not yours you will pay as the husband.

        In my case, in Australia, no paternity test was taken. The test was unilaterally refused by the mother. Even though the legislation says that no child care or allowance for children can be made without the paternity test 95% of assets went to Jennifer.

        THAT is what men face…women refuse to even acknowledge this is the case let alone discuss it, let alone denounce it as the crime it is.

    • Greg

      Reply Reply August 26, 2013

      Mothers in New Zealand can still refuse paternity tests, more than a few put the most eligible guy on the paper they’d been with that month.
      A study in Britain a few years back showed 3 outta 5 fathers who thought that they were the biological father, actually wernt.
      Since Britain Australia and New Zealand adopt similar education and social engineering the statistics would be the same.
      From what I see of 99% of relationships the mans just a second pay check.

  • Hector

    Reply Reply May 2, 2011

    Government laws that promote women to become golddiggers will destroy marriage and families. That hurts women, children and men. There are laws that give women half of the wealth in a marriage to women for being married as little as 3 years (or less). Women will marry men that they do not like, just for the money and they might even half children that they do not want or even like (I am one such child).

    In my case what happened.
    -My father did not remarry ever(was second marriage). He was given custody of the child.
    -My mother went to jail for child abuse(she was bailed out or something), and did other really bad things of which I will not even speak of. She will never see me ever again or receive anything from me (she is the black sheep of her family and no one will even speak of her). She will probably be lonely, as I doubt anyone will love her because of the way she is and probably will continue to be (I don’t wish her harm just a cold analysis).
    -I was severely wronged by the governments failure, to protect children form abuse and by government making laws that promote women to marry for money and not for building a family. (not U.S.)

    My mother’s premeditated plan: was to marry a man with money. Take half his money and leave the husband with the child. Then come back for the child later (presumably to exploit the child). The plan failed because she abused the child. Bottom line: she was considered to have had evil intentions. She had voiced her intentions before the marriage.

  • john

    Reply Reply March 22, 2011

    I dont want to marry an American woman because I dont like being robbed-

  • Maria

    Reply Reply November 25, 2010

    As for Alex’s comments, what a sad commentary. I don’t believe sex is a “commodity” unless someone makes it so. Most people aren’t that hard-boiled and cynical. At least I hope they are not.

  • Maria

    Reply Reply November 25, 2010

    It’s interesting you tell women not to be man bashers or man haters, but yet there are men who bash women all the time, such as that example you put at the start of your article. Why are you giving those men such credence and ignoring what a woman wants or needs in a relationship? If you ask me that man sounds like a complainer who simply doesn’t want to be a responsible adult!

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      Marriage is better for a women then men. Its that simple. At some point in time it changed. Until things change marriage is dead.

  • SD

    Reply Reply September 21, 2010

    Sex is a bargaining too in many species because it poses a huge risk to the female. In a feral sense, pregnancy means nine months of weakness, possible death from childbirth, and five or six years of feeding and guarding an extra life. Of course a woman wouldn’t have sex unless the man proved he could provide for her.

    However, we have birth control now. Sex no longer poses any serious risk to either party, so I don’t think it should be used as a bargaining chip anymore. The price for sex should be sex. Receive sexual pleasure in exchange for sexual pleasure.

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      But it’s not sex is used as a weapon, in marriages and out side of marriages.

  • stefanie

    Reply Reply May 3, 2010

    Peter Pan, I thought the sex was the trick and the home-cooked meals were the rewards…. Am I the monkey now?
    I must be crazy!

  • Peter Pan

    Reply Reply May 2, 2010

    Alex

    I would want a woman that liked me and enjoyed having sex with me.

    I don’t want to bribe someone to have sex. I am not a monkey who needs to do tricks so I can get a reward.

    Good luck getting guys to date you for a month and buy you junk and then continue to buy you junk to show you they care. I think you are going to be alone for a long time.

  • Peter Pan

    Reply Reply May 2, 2010

    “It’s true; if I was a man in this day and age, I would be quite put off marriage to many of the the modern women in the Western world. Truth be told, feminism has done some really bad things to the balance of masculine-feminine and to the values of women and men.

    The reason why men do not marry is actually really simple. A lot of men feel that there is nothing in it for them!”

    Nailed it.

    Marriage to a western women is an exercise in futility and will leave you worse off (financially,etc.) than staying single.

    I know of many that will never (ever!) marry and those who have been burned and will never marry again. Most don’t even want a serious relationship.

    Great job western women. Bed. Lie.

    • Katya

      Reply Reply July 30, 2011

      I know of asian women who do this. It is part of their culture (not all), to chase and entrap wealthy men. I know this from having close friendships with Asians and their families. So why is it only the western womans fault?

      • JS

        Reply Reply November 3, 2011

        Simple.

        Asian women GENERALLY don’t do what you mentioned and the divorce laws in Asian countries aren’t so anti-male. They’re ironically more equal than US laws. Most Asian women who marry do it because they believe in commitment through good times and hard times. There are always exceptions, but most Asian women take marriage seriously and try their best to make it work. They generally stay faithful, stay in shape, and stay loving for their husbands, while most American women… well, let’s just say they become unbearable whales.

        The divorce rate for Asian couples and American couples is very different. Too many American women take advantage of the lopsided laws and screw their husbands over with a mercenary attitude. In 2011 over 50% of American women are single/unmarried.

        Traditional women in foreign countries are the best!

    • Take The Red Pill

      Reply Reply February 22, 2013

      SO true!!

      When Western Women rave on and on about how marriage is so wonderful, men should be aware that it IS wonderful – for women, and ONLY for women.
      For men, marriage has become just a ‘gilded turd’— no matter what it looks like on the outside, what’s inside is still just plain old sh*t!

  • Renee

    Reply Reply April 24, 2010

    Hey Rob,

    Thanks for your kind words. I’m glad you enjoyed the blog. :)

  • Rob

    Reply Reply April 24, 2010

    Hi Renee,

    I just found your articles and am an instant fan!!! I will be showing your site to my wife too, hopefully we can create an even better relationship with your help.

    @Alex, your comments throughout this blogspot are quite repugnant to say the least. You obviously have no self respect and no hope of keeping a man, because we men, don’t take that sort of treatment for very long. No matter how “Hot” you look or how “Good” you may be, your “insights” are twisted and bring through an ugliness that is a cancer on today’s society.

    Sorry to rant on your site Renee, but “Alex”‘s comments have riled me. I haven’t commented on other posts but “Alex” is highly misguided in my view, this one takes the cake.
    Thanks for the site and keep up the good work!

  • twinkle

    Reply Reply January 29, 2010

    The safest thing for a woman to do, if possible, is to NOT sleep with a man UNLESS ITS THEIR WEDDING NIGHT although, that’s a little hard for this day and age—I know a couple who were both virgins at 20 and got married that way(with the LORDS help) and the’re still married today

  • alex

    Reply Reply January 24, 2010

    Hi Renee,
    I agree that in a perfect politically correct world, it may not be deemed an exchange of goods and services. Someone once told me, the man isn’t using you when you sleep with him, it’s a shared positive experience. With an emphasis on shared. However, life experience has taught me very differently. Sex is a transaction, prostitution if you like, all women are either whores, or unpaid whores if they get nothing in return for sex. All women expect something from the man before they sleep together, or else they start to feel resentful. It may be as simple as the man doing the washing up to get a woman in the mood. But the man must give to the woman, in return for the woman giving him sex. Women give sex like a gift. And the man must prove that he cares about the woman first. If he really cared about her then he would take her out and buy her things and be nice to her.

    Women who give sex freely in a relationship of any sort, are the ones that feel used and resentful – and understandably so. My advice is, if you accept that sexual relationships are an exchange of goods and services then you will start to feel more understanding of the opposite sex. It has been this way since the cave man times. Women would only sleep with a man when he bought home the meal for that night, to ensure that they and their offspring survived and passed on their genes. If there was no meal, or no gift at the end of the night, then there would be no sex.

    This is seen even today in tribal cultures untouched by western civilization. The woman only sleeps with a man after he has given her a gift. It’s nature, just accept it. A mother-daughter relationship is much more selfless. It’s a totally different thing.

    • Kaye

      Reply Reply January 27, 2011

      I’m going to recommend the website “What Women Never Hear” to you. It tells how men think and why they act and react certain ways.
      http://wwnh.wordpress.com/

    • Meike

      Reply Reply January 28, 2011

      Well this is romantic! And I must disagree. Or else, I would not find a reason why a woman would cheat in a relationship.

  • alex

    Reply Reply January 20, 2010

    oh and I forgot to add… I wouldn’t date a man exclusively unless he married me. I wouldn’t date him exclusively untill he gives me the ring. Before then, for all he knows, I could be seeing, and sleeping with, other men.

    I also wouldn’t sleep with a man, before, at the very least, a month of dating. And he has to take me out and buy me things first if he expects to sleep with me.

    And most importantly if I am seeing a man I always keep my own life. I never let a man feel like he has control of me. If he starts to take me for granted, then I mix things up and become slightly more aloof by not answering his calls etc. He quickly starts to appreciate me more. Men don’t respond to words, they respond to no contact.

    • Carl

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      You a type of women no man wants as his wife

  • alex

    Reply Reply January 20, 2010

    I mainly agree with what you say, Renee.

    However, I don’t agree when you say “never use sex as a commodity”. Sex is a commodity, always has been! Relationships are an exchange of goods and services. Most women don’t even feel sexual desire unless the man has done something nice for them or given them something nice first, like done the washing and paid for dinner etc. In contrast, men need only to see a woman in lingerie or a sexy outfit to get instantly turned on. A man’s sex drive is free and uninhibited. A woman’s sex drive is much more cautious and vulnerable to different situations. It’s basic biology, the way we are wired. We can’t help it.

    I fully condone using sex as a bargaining tool, personally I wouldn’t sleep with a man unless I get something good from him first. Women feel used by sex – and there are far too many times I’ve felt used by giving sex too freely. It only leads to bitterness and resentment.

    • Renee

      Reply Reply January 23, 2010

      Hi Alex

      Thanks for sharing :) I encourage you to consider the metaphor you are using: ‘relationships are an exchange of goods and services” and to think of how it may affect your relationships and your life. Life metaphors are very powerful things!

      Saying that relationships (relationships, you said, not specifically intimate relationships, so I am going on the premise that you think relationships in general are an exchange of goods and services?) are an exchange of goods and services implies a business relationship. Which might even imply prostitution – if you use sex to get your man to do things.

      Can you imagine how much havoc this would wreak even in a mother-daughter relationship (if you are referring to relationships in general)? I mean, surely a mother-daughter relationship couldn’t be seen as a relationship where it is ‘an exchange for good and services”.

      What do you think?

      Renee.

    • Darrell

      Reply Reply January 25, 2011

      I have to reply to Alex here. If you honestly feel that way, then why should I not just give you $50 for sex huh? Cause you are saying, that you are a PAID WHORE, only will have sex with a man after recieveing some form of “payment”

      Renee, I feel you have a great article here. I just want to point out that some women feel this way too. My Girlfriend says she nevers wants to get married again, after her ex and all the divorce crap that she want through.

    • dave

      Reply Reply February 16, 2013

      Wow! Alex should be a spokeswoman for the INTERNATIONAL MISOGNY CLUB! She has lots and lots of support out there, believe me!

    • Roy

      Reply Reply August 28, 2013

      I would have to agree with Carl on this one Alex, if sex is a bargaining chip for you then combined with your general attitude frankly you are not good marriage material for men – a good one night stand for men that want it – sure (if they can afford you!), but that’s about it…

  • Mary (Civilla)

    Reply Reply January 15, 2010

    Go here for an earfull: http://markymarksthoughtsonvariousissues.blogspot.com/

    P.S. Bad language. But he does have some interesting things to say.

    This was a great post, btw.

    • Greg

      Reply Reply September 9, 2013

      When hasnt it been a chip to bear.
      Women marry up, men marry down.

  • dulantha

    Reply Reply January 15, 2010

    I accept your reply for the above problem. When we are talking about sex, most important thing is the psychological approaching for sex. Especially men need women to be pleasant when they are approaching sex. I know this because I am a man.

    I hope to write some articles to my site about sex and the nature in future.You can also read these in future.

    • Greg

      Reply Reply September 10, 2013

      Most of the men on dating sites are married.
      Says a lot about marriage dont it.

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