Far too many women ignore small but significant signs they’re being treated badly by a guy.
But you shouldn’t ignore warning signs on how he treats you, especially during the early days. I’m here to give you some warning signals to look out for when dating a man.
These are really important, and could really determine your future happiness. After all, 95% of your success in relationships comes down to who you select!
Have you ever observed how he treats you when you’re sick?
What about how he treats you around his friends?
What if your boyfriend treats his female friends better than you?
These are some of the questions we will explore. and their answers could give you some dire warning signs that you are investing your time in the wrong guy.
Table of Contents
Do the quiz: how commitment friendly is my man?
How He Treats You Should Be Consistent
Sometimes women want to talk themselves in to believing that we have our ideal man. It’s hard to leave someone we are already attached to!
I’m sure lots of women do have their ideal man by their side and are really happy.
Still, when it comes to devoting your feminine soul to a man for the long term, you have to be careful.
Here’s why:
Because a toxic relationship will always ruin your self esteem, kill your natural feminine radiance, and keep you small.
So how would you know whether a man is treating your right?
Well, there are definitely things to look out for, and some give you crucial insight into his real nature and intent with you.
More importantly, what are the red flags or warning signs you should look out for? We are going to discuss these right now.
MORE: 3 GIANT Dating Red Flags To Watch Out For When Dating A New Person.
5 Warning Signals To Watch For In How He Treats You
The key to making the right choice in a man is two things:
- Watch his actions; and
- Don’t deny how his actions make you feel
Women are notorious for ignoring bad treatment when they’ve become attached to a man.
It’s understandable – to an extent. You don’t want to ‘give up’ on a man you already love.
Once you’re attached, it’s very hard to let go. Especially if you have low self esteem, insecure attachment patterns or have a history of confusing abuse with love.
If you want to find out whether you have insecure attachment style, you can do my quiz below. (Why is this important? It is because your core attachment style largely dictates and influences what happens in your relationship. Thus it’s imperative you understand your core attachment style!)
Do the quiz: What is my attachment style?
#1: He Doesn’t Take Care of The People Around Him
Take note of the way he treats his mother, grandma, sister, auntie and/or female friends.
You can tell how a man will potentially treat you by the way he treats the women around him. Especially take note of how he treats his mother.
As the popular saying goes:
“How a man treats his mother is how he will treat you.”
Sometimes some mothers can be controlling and unreasonable and are arguably not very good to their son. If this is the case with your guy, then it’s probably a good thing that he stands his ground rather than being a pleaser.
You don’t want a man who takes abuse from his mother, because that is a man who doesn’t know his own boundaries, which is unhealthy.
So if your man is being firm and standing his ground or not letting her push him around about something, there is nothing to worry about.
(Click here to read my article about how to make a man want you)
However, if he:
- Yells at his mum for no reason
- Insults her or offends her
- Ignores her for no reason
- Doesn’t come to her aid when she needs him (when she’s sick, or needs manly work around the house done, or is lonely); or
- Deliberately doesn’t answer her calls all the time
And she is generally good to him, then this could be a warning sign that he may do the same to you (maybe he already has).
The main thing to take out of this is: does he care about people?
Does he care about others outside of HIMSELF?
If a man is only thinking about his own needs, you’ll most likely have a lot of troubles with him later on.
I had an ex-boyfriend who used to constantly ignore his mother when she was trying to take care of him or talk to him, swear at her, and tell her to shut up when she might momentarily interrupt what he was doing (only to offer him something).
It was terribly concerning, and when I asked him about it, he placed the blame on his mother.
His mother would always do whatever he asked, however.
He was extremely spoiled by her. When it came to helping his mum with something, he was never really there for her. He would never ever help her with any chores, even when asked.
Some time later on in my relationship with him, a relative of mine died, and sure enough, he refused to drive out to see me or support me. I began to realise that this guy either really wasn’t into me, or he just didn’t care about anyone but himself!
In hindsight, I think it was a bit of both.
Of course, this situation is also about the way parents bring up their child.
As in this case, they clearly gave him too much and allowed him too much, and his father was definitely not firm enough with him.
However, the issue of how a man treats his mum is still very important.
#2: His Eyes Are Constantly Wandering
When you’re with your man, do his eyes wander?
A man who is always looking for the next thrill, or is desperate for female attention, will often be caught checking out other women.
Also, some men fall flat on their faces when a woman gives HIM attention!
Would you trust a man like that?
This kind of man can be flimsy, and although he says he loves you, he may be “vulnerable” to another woman’s “charms” or attention.
By the way, a lot of men will say that they are “hard-wired” to look at other women.
Well, we as humans should definitely observe and look at people around us, this is surely a natural thing to do, as it’s important to be aware of what is going on in our current environment.
However, if a man is truly in love with his woman and he really respects her, he would not be so interested in checking out other females, especially for the purpose of getting attention/validation from them.
Of course, I don’t believe any man should ignore femininity or other women in general.
It’s important that your man can appreciate the femininity in the women around him, and that goes for any women at any stage of life, not just youthful looking women!
(MORE: Read my article about isn’t SHE pretty? He Said.)
I have a friend whose boyfriend would always be letting his eyes wander. They especially wandered when there were barely-dressed women around.
My friend is not a skimpy dresser, so you really gotta wonder, what was he trying to get by doing this? The problem was, my friend wasn’t aware of this at all. I know a lot of women who aren’t, because they’re too busy thinking of something else.
Of course, it’s important to know the difference between just looking as he would normally look at people, and looking to fulfill another kind of need that he has!
The reason why I think it’s fine for a man to look at a truly feminine woman because for men, their focus is often put into work.
Men traditionally fight for freedom, for their families, and they are traditionally the providers. When a man has been focusing on work all day, and a beautiful woman, the picture of femininity, spontaneity and freedom walks past, it breaks his state.
#3: He Is Never There When You’re Sick
Remember at the start how I mentioned that how he treats you when you’re sick is an important thing to consider?
Well I’ve found this this is a real telltale sign that he doesn’t care about you and that he is not in love with you.
And if he doesn’t care about you and he’s never fallen in love with you, chances are that he will not care much about the children you have together either.
And he also will not care about your blood relatives.
Why do I say this? Here’s why:
Because men invest in the people that you love only when they are in love with you. Otherwise, they simply do not care.
Also, consider the following scenario, because this is actually very common:
Your relationship is going along reasonably well, and you feel generally reasonably happy. Until one day, you become very sick.
And just like that, he’s nowhere to be seen.
Why do men abandon women when they are sick? Well, usually it’s because they were not in love with her in the first place. When a man is in love with a woman, he won’t leave her for anything.
So here’s my question to you: do you want to be with a man who may like you, who may even love you, but never has been in love with you?
Because remember, humans can love all kinds of things. We can love a teddy bear, a type of fruit, and even our favourite mug. It’s not uncommon to love something. So it’s not that valuable.
What’s truly valuable is a man who is in love with you. If you struggle with getting men to fall in love with you, I suggest you learn the one specific emotional trigger that makes him call in love with you…
#4: He Treats His Friends Better Than He Treats You
If you are a critical, ungrateful and judgemental girlfriend, then it’s totally fair enough that he treats his friends better than he treats you.
But if you are generally quite good to him, yet he seems to treat you with less respect than he treats your friends, that’s a sign that he doesn’t perceive much value in you, and alarmingly, perhaps he even wants to keep you around just to use you.
MORE: 6 Behaviours You Should Never Tolerate In A Man.
So what are the signs a man doesn’t respect you?
- He ignores you.
- He comments on other women’s looks all the time, whilst ignoring yours.
- He ridicules and laughs off your life goals.
- He Puts you down.
#5: He Doesn’t Take Responsibility For Your Needs.
Is he only in this relationship for himself? This basically means, does he care about you or does he not care?
If you truly need him, will he do all in his power to be there for you?
- Does he take notice of the things you like?
- Does he make an effort to take you out?
- Make you feel like a little girl again?
- Does he offer to help you with things? Anything!
- Does he call you to check to see how you are?
- When you’re out without him, does he call to check how it’s going, and how you are?
- Does he respect the girly things you love to do? For example, is he bothered if you spend some money for shopping, or have a night out with the girls?
These are just some important things to consider. Do you have any warning signs in mind that you’ve experienced with men? Be sure to share them with me! I’d love to hear from you!
Are you tired of attracting the wrong men? Click here to find out what naturally attracts high value men in the eBook 17 Attraction Triggers.
By the way, I want to teach you 5 secrets to having your man fall deeply in love with you and beg you to be his one and only. These 5 secrets are inside of my brand new program, “Becoming His One And Only”. Click HERE to get yourself a copy before they run out!
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. She graduated with a bachelor of Law and bachelor of Arts majoring in sociology and psychology. She has been a dating and relationship coach for women in the past 15 years and together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 20 million women through their articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
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