If you’re wondering “will he come back?”, the first thing to know is that even if he does, it may not be for the right reasons.
How do you know if it’s for the right reasons?
You’ll know he’s coming back for the right reasons if:
- He’s coming back for you and for the relationship, not just for what he can get; and
- He loves and wants your soul, not just your body
With that said, here are some quick signs that he will come back:
- He’s connected to your emotions
- He wants to take care of you
- He doesn’t think anyone else would take adequate care of you
Now let’s get into the 10 sure signs he will come back and what you can do to have the best chances of ensuring that he will!
Table of Contents
#1: He is Connected to Your Emotions
Most guys aren’t going to be connected to your emotions, full stop.
Even if they’re emotionally intelligent, sensitive and caring, they’re not going to bother with your emotions because they don’t care.
So if a guy shows signs that he was connected to your emotions, chances are decent that he will return someday.
What are the signs he was (or is) connected to your emotions?
- He cares about your sadness and your happiness
- He’s happy when you’re happy
- He gets angry when someone hurts you
#2: He Wants to Take Care of You
When you were together with him, did he try to take care of you? Or was he just half-assing everything with you?
Some women call these men “low effort” men, but they’re not. They’re just men who aren’t in love with you.
It’s like men saying you have a low libido, but usually that’s not the case. Usually a woman doesn’t have low libido, she’s just not attracted to him.
Sure, some men may be “low effort” if they’re going through depression or something horrible just happened in their life and all their energy is going to emotional processing.
But usually, if a guy is low effort or doesn’t bother taking care of you, he likely won’t come back to you.
And if he does, it’ll be just for the company, sex and attention.
So here are some signs he wants to take care of you:
- He notices when you struggle and responds with help
- He offers his monetary and physical resources to solve your problems
- He helps you with your health problems
- He tries to improve the quality of your life. Whether that’s with motivational thinking, offering you better food or helping you improve your workouts, he wants to see your life improved because of him.
By the way, do you know that there’s ONE specific phrase you can say to a man that will capture his undivided attention?
#3: He Doesn’t Think Anyone Else Would Take Adequate Care of You
Will he come back?
He probably will if he harbours the subconscious or conscious belief that no other man is good enough to take care of you.
The caveat is that he has to believe this not out of egocentricity, but out of genuine care for the quality of your life.
If a man always wants to improve your life and takes so much responsibility for that job himself that he doesn’t think any other man could do it, then he’ll probably come back to you.
Well, because he’s the only man for the job!
#4: All His Other Options Are Low Esteemed Women
Ok so this sign may seem like it requires a bit of arrogance on your part (or just jealousy over the other women in his life), but try not to be arrogant about it.
Instead, be honest, have the courage to be real about it.
Is the other woman (or women) he’s seeing low esteemed?
What I mean by low esteemed is that they feel so inadequate inside and so unworthy that they don’t have the confidence to offer him real value.
In general, the lower your self esteem as a woman, the more you take from him and the less value you add to a man’s life.
So if you know that you have high self esteem and are capable of noticing what he truly perceives value in (and are courageous and resourceful enough to give exactly that to him), then he might come back.
And if you add lots of value, you may be able to stop asking yourself “will he come back?” one day!
#5: He Left Because He Didn’t have Enough Money to Provide
When a man doesn’t have the money to provide for you (even though he loves you), there’s a very good chance that he will come back.
…Just not until he’s feeling a bit more worthy of you.
You know how you don’t feel worthy of being called gorgeous or beautiful when you’re having a bad day?
You know how feeling ugly makes you want to retreat from the world or hide away from a man and eat a bag of chips?
Well, when a man doesn’t have enough money to provide for you, he feels kind of the same way.
…I mean, if he’s a decent man of course.
Some men feel no shame about living off a woman and having no money to provide themselves.
Each to their own.
But if your guy is a good man and he genuinely wants to do the right thing, then he might come back if he currently lacks the resources to provide.
#6: You Both Fell In Love With Each Other
Being in love is a rare thing. I’m not talking about infatuation, that’s so cheap.
I’m talking about romantic love.
The type of love that forms a pair bond and makes you guys joined at the hip, not able to stop thinking about one another.
A pair bond creates the couple unit that is necessary for raising children together, and it’s an extremely strong bond between a man and a woman.
That’s why women always want to know how to make a man fall in love.
Because they know it’s the highest currency thing they can have with a man.
What if you both fell in love and you just had a bad argument?
Or what if you both fell in love and other life stressors completely ruined your relationship somehow?
Well, if it was true love, then he’ll come back.
…Unless he’s fallen in love with someone else. And it’s real love.
But if he hasn’t fallen in love with someone else and he was once in love with you, then all you really need to do is re-build that sense of emotional attraction and emotional connection, and slowly he will fall in love again.
If you want him to fall in love with you again quickly, there’s one specific emotional trigger I recommend you use.
#7: He Keeps A Part of You With Him
Will he come back?
He likely will if he’s still so attached to you emotionally that he keeps an item of yours close to him (or even just a memento).
Here are some examples of him keeping a part of you with him:
- He keeps a jar of your perfume
- He keeps your t-shirt, a scarf or a jumper of yours close
- He still wears a personal gift you gave him (like a watch or jewelry)
#8: He Actually Feels Guilt And Remorse
Let’s say he broke up with you and you’re heartbroken.
Well, if he feels remorse for initiating the breakup, then there’s a chance he might come back.
Because perhaps he realizes the grave consequences of his choice to break up with you.
Perhaps he made a terrible mistake and realizes that he should have never risked hurting you the way he has.
If he does feel remorse and guilt, that means he’s emotionally connected to your pain enough that he still values you to some extent.
He may want to make it up to you by treating you more kindly.
Or, he may just want to take you back altogether because he realizes you are indeed the right woman for him.
By the way, after a man breaks up with you, there’s a typical timeline of regret that he goes through.
#9: He’s Currently In A Rebound Relationship
Most people believe that rebound relationships do have a chance of lasting long-term.
But that’s not true.
If the relationship your ex is currently in is actually a true rebound relationship, then there’s a chance he’ll come back, simply because the rebound relationship won’t last.
To give you an idea of how long it will take him to come back to you, read: The 5 Classic Rebound Relationship Stages Your Ex Is Hiding.
…But this doesn’t mean you should wait around for him forever, ok?
Waiting is tempting, especially when you’re in love with him.
But if you’re truly in love with him, try to remember that that feeling may last with you forever.
It may fade over time, but that special feeling will always be there.
So getting up and living your life will not harm your chances of getting back together with him.
#10: He Consistently Keeps In Touch With You Over Time
The key word here is: consistently.
If he has kept in touch with you via phone calls, texts, facebook or instagram messaging, whatsapp…whatever platform you use to communicate with each other, that’s a small reason for hope.
But the key is that it has to last over 2 months or more.
If his contact has been regular and his behavior is responsive to yours (ie: he reciprocates your attempts to reach out to him), that means he will come back to you.
Just keep in mind that you need to make sure he’s coming back because he sees you as his one and only, and not because he sees you as his “one of many”.
If he’s coming back because you’re his “one and only”, then you can be sure he’s coming back for the right reasons.
If however he’s coming back because you’re “one of many” women, that’s a bad thing – you don’t want that, even if he gives you lots of attention and sexually desires you.
So what does the one and only mean?
…And what does the “one of many” mean?
It’s important to be aware that when men first meet and date you, they put you in one of two categories – and it’s never both.
You cannot be in both.
You can only be in one category.
But if you’re in the “one of many” basket, he might still come back to you, but it will only be for what he can get from you…
And he’ll only give you the bare minimum just to keep you around.
If he has placed you in the “one and only” basket however, this means that he will commit his whole life, everything he has (including his soul) to making you happy.
He will be physically, emotionally and spiritually committed to you.
He’ll be committed to providing for you, protecting you and cherishing you for the rest of his and your natural life.
Isn’t that nice?
Well, it’s only nice if you are in the one and only basket.
If you’re in the one of many basket, it doesn’t feel so warm and safe.
It might feel exciting though, because men can still be kind to their one of many woman – they can still offer her some money or attention here and there.
But the caveat is that he will feel no different about you than he feels about any other woman he dates or sleeps with.
And the reason for this is because of men’s two separate reproductive strategies.
One strategy is to commit fully and invest in the one and only (and any kids they may happen to have.)
The other is to spread his seed to as many women as he can – without regard for how the children turn out and whether they have enough or not.
Basically, if he managed to have sex with you, then that’s his job done when you’re the one of many.
Men know this themselves intuitively.
But much like feminists may try to claim that they can have sex with the same man many times without getting attached – some men may try to cover this truth up or push it down.
They may claim that when they have sex with you it’s special, but if you’re “one of many”, it’s not.
It might be exciting and full or lust – but it’s not love – it’s just sexual desire.
So be aware that if a man comes back, you need to make sure it’s for the right reasons.
This is why you should always test men (and don’t be afraid to test!)
Here is how to Test Him to See If He Cares.
And now that we’ve adequately answered “will he come back?”, let’s talk about one low value mistake you don’t want to make if you want him to come back quickly.
ONE Low Value Mistake You Should NOT Make
The one mistake that will ultimately make you look low value is if you try to beg him to come back.
I mean, it’s not a mistake you can never recover from, especially if he loves you.
But there are much more high value ways to inspire him to come back.
By begging him to come back, not only are you delaying your grieving and delaying learning the lesson you need to learn through the breakup…
You’re also being low value, because begging isn’t adding any actual value to his life.
It just communicates your desperation. Which isn’t wrong.
But it’s a value extracting behavior.
So don’t beg.
Instead, show him you’re a high value woman.
Study the three areas of value that make a woman high value to men, and avoid the 7 common signs of low value behavior in women…
There Are 7 Common Signs That A Woman is Perceived as Low Value to All Men. Do You Know What They Are & How to Avoid Them Like the Plague?
(Why is this important? Because men and women perceive value very differently and you don’t want to be making mistakes that would cause quality men to dismiss, abandon or alienate you.)
So Will He Come Back?
…And if he does, should I take him back?
No one can tell you for sure if he will come back.
Only your gut feeling and time will reveal to you whether he will come back or not.
If you see at least 4 of the above signs, then there’s a good chance he will come back.
If you only see one of these signs or less, then perhaps it’s time to rethink waiting on him (if you are waiting on him).
Frequently Asked Questions
What makes a man come back to you?
Feelings of emotional attraction and emotional connection makes a man come back to you.
If those feelings have disappeared, there’s a lower chance of him coming back to you.
Will he come back after no contact?
That depends on whether he perceives enough value in your relationship.
If he doesn’t, then of course he won’t come back. (And if he does, it will be out of some obligation, not out of love).
If he does, then he will.
Will he come back if I leave him alone?
First of all, if you believe that just by leaving him alone he’ll come back to you, you’re only relying on luck.
Leaving someone alone doesn’t bring them back to you.
Unless you’re playing mind games and all you want is for them to come back out of curiosity – and fear that you’ve pulled your attention away from them.
If you want a man to stay, then make him fall in love.
Make him see you as the one and only. That way, you’ll never have to worry about him leaving you under any circumstance.
If you’d like to learn the 5 feminine secrets to becoming any man’s one and only, CLICK here to find out more about my program “Becoming His One And Only”.
(The promise of this course is for you to have your chosen man fall in love with you & beg you to be his one & only by embodying these 5 feminine secrets, even if he’s been distant, avoidant, or losing interest…)
Will he come back if we never dated?
Only if he was in love.
If you know that he was, then there’s a very good chance that he will come back.
Let him go, he’ll come back to you – is this true?
There’s a famous quote: “if you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it is yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.”
There’s a certain truth to this, in the sense that if you owned his heart to begin with, of course he’ll come back.
…Unless of course your relationship (and you) were extremely toxic, and thus the costs of being with you outweigh the importance of the romantic love he feels for you.
But try to remember that just because you let him go, doesn’t mean he will come back.
If he never loved you, why would he come back just because you let him go?
If you want to be supported by a warm community of high value feminine women, then join our Facebook Group. (It’s free and so incredibly valuable!) CLICK HERE TO join thousands of other women in our “High Value Feminine Women” Community.
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
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