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How to Become the Kind of Woman Men Want to Marry

Article Updated 2018

Before I begin, let me just share a few extracts taken from an anti-marriage website:

“My wife was a frigid, shriveled b***h. Before we were married, we had plenty of sex, but as soon as we passed the six month mark after our wedding, she stopped being interested. My wife only f***s when she “feels sexy.” Translation: when I give her jewelry. She is just a withered old bag at the age of 35.”

“What security is there for men in marriage? If I cheat on my wife, she gets half my s**t. If she cheats on me, she still gets half my s**t. Why the f*** should I get married”

“We had one kid. Wife stays home, but the kid wears her out. I bust my f****** ASS 60 hrs/week and get no credit. Wife gives me guilt when I don’t throw everything down right after work to watch this screaming, annoying f****** kid so she can go out to the gym, or to some restaurant with her friends, or to her sister’s house to watch movies.

She gets to take naps during the day when the baby sleeps, and every time I call her on the cell during the day, she is at Starbucks with her Mom or friends. She says that doesn’t count as “Her time” because she’s with the baby.

I’ve had enough. I feel so undervalued and OWNED. She is so ‘entitled’ now it’s like 60 (or 70, or 80) hours a week from me is EXPECTED. Being at work from 8-7 counts as my ‘social’ time, so I am not allowed to have any friends or ever do ANYTHING outside of change F****** DIAPERS”

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> MY ANSWER

Hi there 🙂

I hope you’re having a lovely day and I haven’t thrown you off with those comments above! Now I am sure that, even just by reading these words you can see the frustration, resentment and anger inside these men.

(Please note: Whilst I acknowledge that marriage takes 2, and that men need to step up and take charge of their own actions as well – this website is for women, so I focus mainly on what can be done from the woman’s end).

It’s true; if I was a man in this day and age, I would be quite put off marriage to many of the the modern women in the Western world. Truth be told, the state of our society has done some really bad things to the balance of masculine-feminine and to the values of women and men. (Click here to take the quiz “Am I Dating a Commitment Friendly Man?”)

The reason why men do not marry is actually really simple. A lot of men feel that there is nothing in it for them!

And what IS in it for them when they don’t have a good woman? The fast-moving modern world that we live in has ensured that women are working longer hours, juggling more responsibilities, and progressively less able to place their men as their top priority.

In fact, most women place their children at the top of their priorities – which may seem like the best thing to do, but men can grow to resent this as their women are more fulfilled taking care of their kids than they are taking care of their men.

In the meantime, their man gets/feels neglected. Even more important – most women just have no idea how men work. They do not understand them, and most of them do not want to understand them; they’re too busy attending to their other tasks or priorities – in other words, themselves.

However, just as you want to be understood; so does your man! It’s important to not be a man-hater, or a man-basher and stop putting everything down to “Men just want sex”. This is not always true, and true love does exist.

What Is The One Specific Emotional Trigger Within Every Single Man in this World That Inspires Him to WANT to Commit to One Woman, Want to Take Care of Her, Worship Her and Only Her? Click here to find out right now…

How to become marriage material

So how do you become the kind of woman men want to marry? I will give some strategies below:

– Stop thinking of yourself.

Spend 60 days taking responsibility for your man’s needs and seeing things from his perspective, no matter how hard things are for you. If you do this, he may be more receptive to your needs and you will most likely get him in a different state; a state where you can bring up the topic of your needs with him.

– Understand him, and how he works.

Work out what his needs and values are, and start to understand. If you’re often defensive, start to seek understanding. Understanding gives you control and empowerment. We have a program called Understanding Men, click here to get more information about this phenomenal program.

You’ll have a lot more certainty and happiness in your relationship if you start to understand that you DO have control over it – and you CAN make it better. More importantly, if you know how to meet his needs in a variety of ways better than anyone else ever could – he would have no reason not to want to be with you for as long as possible!

– Do not deny him sex regularly and do not use it as a commodity; do not ever use sex to specifically get what you want from him, if you want sex to be, for the long-term, a mutually enjoyable thing that you both share together.

Also, when you do sleep with him, be real, be honest and be generous. What do I mean by this? I mean understand him and learn why he wants sex. Don’t do it hoping it will be over soon. He knows this. He feels it. (Click here to take the quiz “How Naturally Feminine Am I Actually?”)

It is very hard on a man to be sleeping with a woman who wants it to be over, and treats his sexual needs as another “chore” to be done on the list. It’s important that you make time for him, and for the both of you to be together and to keep the passion alive and kicking.

– Have high standards for yourself.

Get fit, eat well. Also, just because you have had a child does not mean it’s ok to be overweight, depressed or “old” or no fun anymore. My lovely, as hard as it can be to look after so many things, and to have so many things on your mind, make it a habit to set your standards high.

If you want the great rewards and a fantastic loving husband who adores you, start by adoring him and understanding him. Understand that a man like his wife to look nice, not just for the sake of looking nice, BUT because he wants to know that his wife/girlfriend still CARES enough to bother making herself look nice for him.

This goes regardless of age. Just because a woman is 60, does not mean she can’t look good anymore. It’s more about never getting “old” on the inside, which then affects the outside.

These are a few good things that you can do to ensure you are on the right track to being the kind of woman a man wants to marry. And, it’s not all about getting a man to marry you or commit to you, it’s about starting by giving without expecting anything in return. (read my article about the difference between pleasing and giving)

Men aren’t as terrible as so many women say. They are not “all the same”, and men are happy to be loyal and give to us and cherish a good woman who takes care of his needs and gives beyond herself. They are not always unreasonable creatures, there are compassionate, caring men around.

And, your man should do the same, too. Relationships are about giving.

If you would like to know exactly step by step how to inspire your man to commit to you and marry you, I suggest you sign up to my program Commitment Control 2.0. It is the best program of its kind to help women in casual situations to a deeply devoted and committed relationship. Click here to register to watch the Commitment Masterclass. 

By the way, I want to teach you 5 secrets to having your man fall deeply in love with you and beg you to be his one and only. These 5 secrets are inside of my brand new DVD, and right now it’s FREE. Click HERE to get yourself a copy before they run out!

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P.S. Connect with me on social media.

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And That Is The Truth
Guest
And That Is The Truth

Just too many women nowadays that love sleeping around with different men all the time.

Holly
Guest
Holly

Wow, there seems to be an overwhelming number of woman-haters commenting on this specific post. Based on what I’ve read of Renee’s posts so far, I don’t think any of it is aimed to “trick” males into doing anything. If you can hold off your prejudice and past trauma long enough to read her posts calmly and thoroughly, I think you’ll see that Renee’s trying to teach women how to be the best and most authentic versions of themselves so that they can best serve themselves AND the people around them, particularly their significant other. Notice her emphasis on adding… Read more »

Pat Kirby
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Pat Kirby

Q: “How to become marriage material: So how do you become the kind of woman men want to marry?”

A: Detach yourself from the destructive, corrupt, weeping cancerous pustule known as feminism that does nothing but produce fatherless children, give you a false sense of security, and sweet slow-acting poison to empower yourself with.

Marriage? Men need to marry like a Bank needs a Robbery. Date foreign, they’re much more feminine, actually respect Men and are not fat.

* Note: Remember to never capitalize the word ‘feminism’ because you only capitalize proper nouns and feminism isn’t a proper anything.

Insidious_Sid
Guest
Insidious_Sid

There is nothing – I repeat NOTHING that can make the New North American Woman (who is completely poisoned by feminism) into marriage material. She is taught – nay – indoctrinated, on a daily basis from grade school through university, into putting HER self and HER wants and HER dreams first and being totally self reliant and independent and to “Need No Man”. And the man? Oh, she’ll get one if she WANTS one… well it seems although some women still want to GET married, they don’t seem to like to STAY married. At my kids school, single mothers are… Read more »

Todd
Guest
Todd

Yea, that’s exactly how I see it. I’ll never get married.

arleigh
Guest
arleigh

if the courts were not dishonest and lopsided , marriage COULD be an equal thing but it’s not . Courts are too lazy to investigate the truth of a matter, and choose to rule on legal loupe holes rather than honest critical diagnosis . Out law divorce and the world would change . NO back door for any reason ,and the bond is permanent . so that if you carelessly get into something you pay for it for the rest of your life . Result you don’t get involved with people whom are disreputable, unless of course you are disreputable… Read more »

Anon1
Guest
Anon1

Even as a married man, I wholeheartedly agree with men not wanting to get married. On average, today’s western woman is a train wreck. She has had so much “free love”, that she can no longer for pair bonds, plus they are shallow money grabbers. Guys, listen to a married bloke, Stay Single!

Sun
Guest
Sun

I dont agree with a woman putting a man above her children. A child is young, helpless and needs thei mother but a fully grown man can take care of himself and to me if he feels resentful because of that then to me theres something wrong with him feeling that he should come first over a small, little child or baby. To me their is something really weird and kinda pathetic that he a grown man feels he should come first over a child. Plus, I read numeous child abuse cases where a child has suffered or even died… Read more »

Holly
Guest
Holly

I think that, for married couples, their decisions should be made together. They should come together and decide the best course of action to take — something that they would both be happy with (enthusiastic agreement from both spouses). This would require both of them to put each other’s needs, concerns, and values on the same level as their own. If they do this, then they can come together as a united team to handle any situation in a way that would be best for everyone involved, including the children. By doing this, they would be acting out of a… Read more »

The_Crash_Of_83
Guest
The_Crash_Of_83

With an attitude like that, you’ll never have a good man. I just broke up with a woman I was with for 4 years because she wouldn’t put me in my rightful place in our relationship. Her kids are not young anymore, either. This behavior causes a serious amount of resentment and mistrust, especially when the woman demands that the man put her first, as my ex did. Now I have a son as well, and what her behavior did to me was make me spitefully treat her the same way, although my instinct as a traditional and conservative man… Read more »

anon
Guest
anon

I’m a man and fully agree that the children come first. That doesn’t mean that the man should be ignored or feel like he has been demoted in the relationship or is getting emotional scraps. The arrival of a child should be about the two of them coming together as new parents with the understanding that this child needs more nurturing and attention. But unless there are very extenuating circumstances, they should still find quality time for each other.

Marius
Guest
Marius

I think this article misses the whole point, all it does is to teach women how to trick men into marriage. The bottom line is, as long as women have increased expectations while in the macro environment men are demonized and family courts have no time for men and women find it easy to demand commitment while they don’t have to be committed. You can be sure women will not respect their men and all this talk about what to do for a man will only be done until she got him to marry her. After that she knows she… Read more »

Heather Nelson
Guest
Heather Nelson

You’re wrong. Ive been married for ten years and try to do these things for my husband consistently. Not all Western women are man haters. I truly love my husband and care for him. I do this while taking sixteen credit hours at school.

Harvell Jefferson
Guest
Harvell Jefferson

Not all Western women are bad news. You are right. I just don’t know which ones are and aren’t. The 50%+ divorce rate worries me, that and the fact that women are the ones filing for divorce 75 to 80% of the time. I just can’t bring myself to buy a ticket in that lottery. I got too much to lose. I don’t like the odds.

HOLMES
Guest
HOLMES

50% divorce rate? Try 76% and the female initiate 82% of them! The “average female in the US is OBESE to the tune of 56% of them! Take away the OBESITY, tattoos, piercings, excessive debt, gambling, cheats, diseases, smoking, feminists, alcoholics, drug addicts, babymommies w/multiple babbies w/multiple babydaddies, narcissists, STDs, no makeup facers, bare leggers, look like duders, lazy asses, social media/phone addicts, liars. What is out there? I was married for over 25 years,that’s TWENTY FIVE YEARS. I was with her for almost 30. All to be “not denied” sex. Kids first, mother/father,sister, friends, neighbor, soap operas, whore novels,… Read more »

Marius
Guest
Marius

For 20 years I have been listening to “women don’t need men” so I built my life on the virtue that I should go my own way. So I did not realizing that once women hit 35 then they suddenly “need men” again. Well sorry I moved on, will never marry or look back. If women can say they don’t need men, then they should be happy if men take a complimentary direction in their own lives. If women can be independent. Don’t now blame men if we do the same. Now that I say I don’t need women, women… Read more »

Pat Kirby
Guest
Pat Kirby

Men need to marry like a Bank needs a Robbery.

Bemiw
Guest
Bemiw

May I add one more thing to your comment that so many men “feel that there is nothing in it for them”. It is worse than that. Much worse. At last count, 48% of marriages end in divorce. Of those, 70% are initiated by women (Yes true!) Times men lose their children – 90%. Times men are ordered to pay child maintenance – 90%. Times men lose half of everything they own – 100%. Then, depending on where you live – there is alimony and who knows what else. Fact is – for men today, marriage not only offers many… Read more »

Darren McLain
Guest
Darren McLain

I’m 49 years old. I’ve been married 23 years. I’m not an abuser, an adulterer, or an addict. My wife chose years ago to limit our relationship by playing everything close to the vest and keeping me at arms length. I’ve single-handedly cared for my family for 18 years. I remained true to my commitment even though it was hard, ever hoping things could change. Three weeks ago she served me divorce papers and now I’m looking at paying her for the rest of my life, the rest of her life, or until she remarries. Really? This is the reward… Read more »

Marius
Guest
Marius

The good part of your experience is that you have the story to tell and for other young men to learn from. I am glad that I paid attention to guys like you and many others, even close friends and relatives so that I don’t make the same mistake. I think young males crave guidance from men who went down the road already. It didn’t take much after school to convince me that to stay single and keep it in my pants would be the wisest thing ever. Both my parents and a psychologist agreed that I made good decisions.… Read more »

Insidious_Sid
Guest
Insidious_Sid

Thanks for sharing your story Darren. MGTOW men everywhere are spreading this message to the younger generations of men so they can at least make informed life decisions. Of course, this outrages feminists and women in general… so it begs the question: why can’t young men know the truth. Why? Because it’s a SHAM and the JIG is UP!

Harvell Jefferson
Guest
Harvell Jefferson

I’ve seen this happen to too many of my friends and that’s one reason I choose to remain single. I worked hard for my assets and live a good life. I will not put it in jeopardy. I wish you well sir.

The Dude
Guest
The Dude

As your website is “for women” the sexism just bleeds through…great job. Try reading some Brene Brown…women are the patriarchy.

Sean Michael Diggs
Guest
Sean Michael Diggs

Never won a hand in poker, blackjack, hold em, and if i bet on red it will land on black. I have no luck when it comes to gambling. Id have to be an IDIOT to roll the dice in the greatest gamble of them all, marriage.

Charles Hurst
Guest
Charles Hurst

Wow it seems this lady writing is what we in MGTOW call a unicorn. That’s a good thing my dear. But so rare that us MGTOWs gave up trying to find one. Nice article but let me state something. . . for all the non unicorn women out there aka “the modern woman.” If you have to follow these points to get a man to marry you then you aren’t a good woman, you are an actress until the ring is placed. Don’t think we MGTOWs don’t know that. Sorry Renee, the unicorn is the exception but the rule is… Read more »

Vana
Guest
Vana

I would ask men the same question. I make my own money. I cook, I clean. I can run a household. So other than sex, what can a man offer me?

BlueLanternMonk
Guest
BlueLanternMonk

Side a man’s social status and power (see: income) are most important to women and most wives put out less than once a week, there’s nothing that a man could offer an old, fat, infertile woman; better to find a youger less established lady. Lol!

Marius
Guest
Marius

That;s exactly my point with modern women, if you take sex out of the equation, you don’t have anything to gain, you only have much too lose.

William Turley
Guest
William Turley

Hello. Two things need to occur: first, legalize prostitution. After all, its a woman’s body and she has a right…… Secondly: in 5-8 years, anatomically correct robots will hit the market. They will be so real that one won’t b able to tell the difference. Picture a robot, programmable to discuss philosophy, science, history, etc., be whatever you want emotionally, that can also drive, period the house, cook, clean, etc. Truly all of us are not going to put up with human idiosyncracies any longer….that is unless you program your robot to so imbibe. A misanthropic nivana so to b… Read more »

William Turley
Guest
William Turley

Hi. So what can a man offer you? You ask. Hopefully nothing. Nothing at all. Its important for you to remember that you don’t need a man….You are woman, I want to watch you roar. Remember, men are visual and are attracted to beauty. So let yourself go. Eat any and everything you want. The bible teaches that long hair in a woman is her crowning glory. Who is some type of pig God to tell you anything? Cut yours real short. Spike it. Dye it in individualized colors….blue, red, purple. Wear Birkenstocks. Let your hygiene go. Stop shaving. Period.… Read more »

Insidious_Sid
Guest
Insidious_Sid

^^ This. This is why when a woman says she (finally) wants/needs man, you laugh, turn and run.

Harvell Jefferson
Guest
Harvell Jefferson

As you can see from some of the posts here most of us are not in an offering frame of mind anymore. In my case I find no education in the second kick of a mule (if you get my drift).

Scott B
Guest
Scott B

It’s simple, for me the risk of marriage is has never been worth the reward. Pretty simple. And now I have proof women think the same way. I’m dating a high earning doctor. I’m an engineer and she makes double what I do. She doesnt want to get married because she is scared to jeapordize everything she built and her future earnings. She admits there is a double standard in media and society that empowers women to be independant and shames men for doing the exact same thing.

Mister Alighieri
Guest
Mister Alighieri

Great article. If more women did these things, more men would marry and divorce would be less of an issue. However with divorce being a real threat, many men -good men- are deciding that it isn’t worth the risk. As women have changed over the last 50 years to take on careers and jobs. Many men have also learned to handle the domestic realm well enough. So more men can cook and clean and care for a home without a woman. Sex is easily obtainable via charisma or cash. Companionship can be found amongst friends. So that leaves the desire… Read more »

Todd
Guest
Todd

50% chance of the man not getting the kids?? Try 90%

Crystal
Guest
Crystal

I also salute and respect the man above that you quoted and would not take bullshit from his wife and let himself be USED. Why? Because most men DO NOT STAND UP LIKE THAT. They let themselves be used and manipulated by frigid, lazy wives. Just like the man I love is doing now happily, working his ass off to support that frigid cunt who always says how tired she is and how she needs his help 24hrs/day. He works 11 hours a day sometimes and then stays with the kids at night so that she gets sleep. What the… Read more »

WannaBeMGTOW
Guest
WannaBeMGTOW

They don’t have much of a choice but to let themselves be used like that…..if they throw too much of a tizzy, she leaves…….and as we’ve already stated, when she leaves she gets everything.

Insidious_Sid
Guest
Insidious_Sid

Well of course we tolerate it. We either tolerate it, or show blows up the family in a Frivorce and we’re left destitute, possibly never seeing our own kids again, while she bangs the new boyfriend in the house we paid (and continue to pay) for. Pretty glib comment from a female who doesn’t know what it is like AT ALL to live with a person who has a divorce gun in the bedroom dresser who could use it on ANY GIVEN DAY. Just more proof women have NO CLUE about the risks men take, and the terrible decisions we… Read more »

Crystal
Guest
Crystal

Do not agree!! I have been in a relationship with a man with whom I had amazing sex, he was my world to me and I was putting him first before anyone else in my life. He said he loved me….He left me for a frigid woman (or asexual, whatever) who is putting their kids first now and only wanted him to have stability and some kids to raise with his support. And he is happy like that. I have learnt men value you more when you DO put yourself first. They also value freedom. He actually told me that… Read more »

BlueLanternMonk
Guest
BlueLanternMonk

Taylor et al. (2000) first proposed the idea of a unique female stress response which they termed “tend-and-befriend.” The tend-and-befriend response is characterized as an oxytocin mediated stress response cascade. There are numerous biochemical and evolutionary explanations for this unique female stress response that would have increased the survival of females and their offspring under conditions of stress and hence increased the chances of subsequent reproduction. Estrogen has been found to increase the effects of oxytocin already in excess in females as compared with males. Testosterone and vasopressin, the counterparts of estrogen and oxytocin, present during the male stress response,… Read more »

Elizabeth Grant
Guest
Elizabeth Grant

Hi Renee, I think you will also find that once men have had their children, they place even less value on women. You will see that in the posts that are in response to your blog, as well as in society. 50% of marriages end up in divorce, and of the 50% of men that are divorced, or getting divorced, those who have children, see no real value in women, even in the mothers of their children. And from there, once they have their kids, they view, and treat, women even worse, even these own very mothers of their children.… Read more »

BlueLanternMonk
Guest
BlueLanternMonk

Lol, bb! You’re correct, about me. I cuckolded a good man, at no personal expense and I’m a motherless misogynist. 70% of American men ages 20-34 aren’t married and women lose 90% of their ovarian eggs by the age of thirty. You’re a cutie! Women should be property, like the virtually useless, Affirmative Action sponging, animals that you are and always will be.

Elizabeth Grant
Guest
Elizabeth Grant

You are insane. Have you no better purpose with your life? You don’t even know who, and what, you are talking to. Rave on in lunacy. You are on the wrong forum here. You missed the boat.

BlueLanternMonk
Guest
BlueLanternMonk

I’m a strong swimmer, like the sperm that I cuck’d a good man with and unlike Affirmative Action recipient’s, such as white woman and all other nigger’s. I like how you have such soft and squishy emotes for me, honey! Go make me a casserole; after you service my other needs, which are your only real use, outside of reproduction. You’re to be property, little girl! ‘Women like bad boys, but just how bad? According to a new study, the most self-absorbed men may be the best choice for women who desire reproductive success. A group of researchers from Jagiellonian… Read more »

BlueLanternMonk
Guest
BlueLanternMonk

I love you too, as a sex object. You girl’s are saying literally the same thing, two comment’s in a row. I don’t have a feemale brain, unlike our feemale voting majority; with its larger emotion and communication center’s. I have larger sex and aggression center’s, as a man – the apex predator of Earth. I’m offering you two how’s the solution. 54% of American women voted for Hillary Clinton and she’s a self proclaimed feminist and only men may be conscripted. Women’s happiness is way down…..look it up, bitch! Smash them titties together, like I like?

Insidious_Sid
Guest
Insidious_Sid

Indeed. Time to go back to the drawing board.
For men, we know there are three failsafe approaches:
1. No marriage
2. No cohabitation
3. Do not support other men’s children by supporting single mothers.
4. Do not become defacto parent, step parent, or adoptive parent of another man’s kids.

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