We all want to feel hopeful of a reconciliation if someone we love leaves us.
But if a man doesn’t want to be with us, is hope really the best thing you could feel?
Perhaps not.
Perhaps feeling the sadness when you know the signs he will never come back would be worth more to you.
I know it doesn’t feel like it. Believe me, I know. No one wants that kind of pain.
But the pain really is worth more in the long-run, because the quicker you can grieve and move on, the better the quality of your life.
(…And the quicker you can make room for a man who is truly right for you.)
With that said, here’s what we’ll accomplish in this article:
- We’ll go through the 17 signs he will never come back.
- Then we will discuss 3 important things you need to do NOW
- Finally, we will answer some commonly asked questions on the topic
Table of Contents
#1: He Blocks You On All Social Platforms
One of the biggest signs he will never come back is if he blocks you on all social platforms.
…And this block continues for at least a couple of months.
Now:
Some people can be a bit crazy – they can block you and then unblock you….block and then unblock, and so on.
But if your ex boyfriend or husband has flat out blocked you on everything – and hasn’t unblocked you for a couple of months or more, that’s a good sign he really doesn’t want to come back.
If there was a part of him that hopes to reconcile with you, then he’d leave you unblocked.
Why?
Because he’d want to send you signals that he’s open to being contacted.
But if he doesn’t unblock you, then chances are pretty good that he has no intentions of coming back.
Of course there are exceptions, for example sometimes a guy may want to block you to punish you for something, even though he still loves you deep down.
By the way, did you know that there is an emotional trigger you can use on masculine men that inspires them to want to take care of you, worship you and commit to you?
#2: He Has Stopped Asking About Your Life
Did he used to care about what you were doing, who you were with and what your interests were – but no longer asks about these things?
Worse still – did he used to listen when you spoke about your life but now acts like he couldn’t care less?
If you did something to hurt him and he’s decided to detach from you, that’s fair enough.
But if you haven’t betrayed him in any way, and somehow over time he stopped caring about what is going on and what you’re doing with your life, that’s not a good sign.
It’s more than likely a sign he doesn’t want to be a part of your life anymore.
Related: How to Stop Caring About A Guy (& Everything & Everyone): 10 Genius Ways.
#3: He Rarely Takes Your Calls or Responds to Messages Promptly
…And if he does, it’s brief and emotionless.
If he is not willing to take your calls or make an effort to respond to your texts, that’s a sign he’s no longer interested in putting an effort into connecting with you.
On top of that, if he answers but his voice is monotone, that’s not a good sign.
It’s almost as if he’s giving you no room to inch your way back into his life.
Worse still, he may be sounding emotionless so that he can remove any chance that you will become emotionally attached to him again.
Also, if you get the feeling that he’s only talking to you out of obligation or guilt then that’s a solid sign he doesn’t want to come back.
By the way, did you know: There Are 7 Common Signs That A Woman is Perceived as Low Value to All Men. Do You Know What They Are & How to Avoid Them Like the Plague?
(Why is this important? Because men and women perceive value very differently and you don’t want to be making mistakes that would cause quality men to dismiss, abandon or alienate you.)
#4: There’s No Sign of Him On Your Social Media
Is there no sign of him on your social media posts or in your stories watch list?
Did he used to watch your stories and like or comment on your posts?
If there isn’t, take heed: this could be one of the signs he will never come back.
Of course – things could change in the future.
But if this sign is occurring alongside a lot of the other signs on this list, then it’s not looking like he wants to engage with you anymore.
Try not to think this means there’s something wrong with you.
Men move on for all kinds of reasons, and what you need to consider is that the message is pretty loud and clear:
He doesn’t want to interact with your posts or have anything to do with them.
Sure, he could be doing it from a fake account or something…
But the fact is, even if he was doing that, he does not want you to see him watching or caring, and that’s telling you something in and of itself.
#5: You Feel It In Your Gut
Sometimes you can just feel it. You feel the relationship is over deep in your gut.
And as much as you wish it wasn’t true – you know it is.
Your body knows it is.
Your body knows a lot more than your thoughts give it credit for, so if you feel that huge weight in your gut, kind of like something is weighing you down (perhaps it’s dread or grief over a dying relationship), then listen carefully.
You might not want the feeling to be there.
You might try really hard to fight it off, because it hurts too badly to detach from him.
But it’s there.
And you can’t control it.
And that’s a good thing.
Do you know why?
Because despite you hating that feeling, it really is trying to do the best thing for you.
#6: He Refuses to Make Eye Contact With You
This is one of the most telltale signs he will never come back:
When he refuses to make eye contact with you in public.
Despite your efforts, he just…doesn’t want to lock eyes with you.
Body language makes up 55% of all communication. That’s more than half of communication.
Whilst his lack of eye contact could mean a few different things, you can’t mistake its main purpose:
To stop you coming close to him or asking anything of him.
Basically, it’s rejection.
MORE: 17 Upsetting Signs He Wants You To Leave Him Alone.
Whether he’s rejecting you or rejecting the emotional commitment you are needing from him, it’s not looking good.
…But that’s ok (well, as ok as I can make it sound through the written word on the internet).
Because remember, if he’s not ready to commit to you, that leaves room for the right guy.
Would you like to discover how commitment friendly he actually is? You can do that with our quick and easy quiz.
#7: He Stops Offering Praise
So here’s the deal:
It’s not always easy for a masculine man to remember to praise a woman, as they often neglect to notice the details of your outfits, hair or nails.
They also don’t care about a woman’s achievements as much as women care about a man’s achievements because a woman’s achievements are not worth much to a man inside of a romantic relationship.
However, when a man is truly in love with you, he would’ve noticed to some extent that praising you makes you happy.
So if he was in love with you, there’s no doubt he would’ve praised you in the past.
Praise makes your feminine energy grow and your radiance shine.
If he used to praise you and add value to you in this way but no longer does, (no matter how hard you work or how sexy you look), that’s one of the solid signs he’s not coming back.
On another note, would you like to discover how naturally feminine you are at your core?
#8: He Doesn’t Touch You Or Want To Come Close
When a man is attracted to you, he wants to touch you, period.
He will want to show you affection, touch your shoulder, hair or face, and he will want to at least hug you or put his arm around you.
But if he’s avoiding that at all costs, it means he doesn’t want to give you any openings or let you come close.
This is a very painful reality for you to process, I am sure.
But he’s sending you a message.
So rather than protesting the message, it would actually serve you more to accept where he is at.
If for whatever reason he is so hurt or so “done” with you that he doesn’t want to come close to you or offer any affection, then let him have that space.
You’ll have more power in the future if you let him have this, because resisting it or kicking up a fuss will push him further away from you at this time.
If you want to know the signs that he will come back, read my article: Will He Come Back? 10 Signs He Will & 1 Low Value Mistake.
#9: He Encourages You to See Other People
…Or introduces you to new guys to “help” you get over him and move on.
If I had to pick only one sign to share with you, it’d be this one.
Of all the signs he will never come back, this is the most stand-out one, and there’s a good reason for it.
Because men who truly care about you – men who want to invest in you – will never, ever, ever set you up with a new man or hope that you’ll move on with someone new.
They’ll at least try to stay in your life, because they wouldn’t want their precious woman, their “one and only” to let another man “in” there (if you get my drift.)
They’ll fight for you if they love you.
They’ll want to possess you. You’re too important to them.
Having said this, there’s a small number of contexts in which a man will do this (try to help you move on with a new guy) out of pure low self esteem and low self worth.
If a man is truly in a low place and doesn’t feel worthy of the relationship with you – or just plain doesn’t see himself as good enough to make you happy, he may urge you onto someone new.
But still, this is very rare. He has to really have deep seated issues to do this.
Most of the time, guys aren’t going to let another guy into their woman, no matter how emotionally damaged they are.
They may make you jump through hoops to earn their affection again, but they simply will not risk you sleeping with another man.
…Let alone “help” you do it!
My advice?
If he wants another man to take his place, hear it loud and clear.
He is not choosing you.
And that’s ok.
Not a single one of us is perfect and being more “perfect” won’t make him choose you.
This is just the reality with him and that’s ok. Because the reality will be different with another guy.
#10: He Got Someone Else to Deliver Your Belongings to You
Will he come back?
If he’s asked someone else to deliver your belongings to you, then likely not.
It’s one thing if he’s not in the country and cannot deliver your things to you in person himself.
But if he’s in the country and he gets someone else to do this for him, this is him sending you a clear message:
“I’m done. Do not contact me again.”
#11: You Kept Up Toxic Patterns Despite Multiple Warnings
…Only the insecurely attached men (or perhaps deadbeats or men with low self esteem) will tolerate a relentlessly toxic woman.
(For more on attachment styles, see: The 4 Types of Attachment Styles in Relationships & Which One’s Yours?)
No one wants to willingly sign up to be with you if the costs continuously outweigh the benefits.
We all prefer to choose mates who offer far more value than they take.
If you’re abusive, toxic, manipulative and controlling, and you’ve only gotten worse despite his protests or warnings, he’d be stupid to come back.
Which brings us to the next sign he’ll never come back…
#12: The Only Thing Holding You Two Together Was THIS…
…A child.
In some of the worst abuse cases I’ve ever seen (abuse of a guy by his girlfriend), the guy went back to the physically abusive woman because she fell pregnant.
She burned him with hot water, she scolded him and any woman who got close to him, she starved him (yes, she managed to starve him), and he got so far into the relationship (because of the child involved), that he nearly died.
Everyone saw it…everyone warned him…but she managed to bring him back due to how convincingly and seductively kind she was after falling pregnant and becoming a mother.
The hormones of motherhood change us for some time, but it can’t hold the facade forever.
But sometimes a child will indeed cause a man to come back to you.
And almost every woman knows deep down inside whether it’s only the child holding the two of them together.
Perhaps she tries to ignore it, perhaps she pushes the truth far, far away from her conscious mind…
But she knows it.
And if you know that the only thing keeping you two together was a child and now he’s officially declared that things are over…
He’s not coming back.
And if he does, it’s because he wants to see the child.
#13: Your Feelings Mean Nothing to Him
If he ignores how you feel, that’s a possible sign that he’s detached from you now.
Or perhaps that he has no feelings left, for whatever reason.
Granted, even inside marriages a man can ignore his wife’s feelings, but this behavior is a reflection of toxic patterns in the relationship.
If your ex has been ignoring your attempts to share how you feel and won’t connect to any feeling you express, no matter how vulnerable, that means the relationship might be past its use by date.
You can blame negative associations building up in the relationship for this behavior, or just the fact that he’s a hostile person.
Regardless, it’s never a sign of growing love and connection.
#14: He Breaks All His Promises
During a break up, sometimes a man will continue to make verbal promises to you about what he will do for you.
Either because he intends to treat the breakup as just a temporary “break” or because he still wants to keep you around for the future “just in case”.
But if he’s breaking all these promises, that’s one of the signs he will never come back to you.
Broken promises in this type of context usually means he’s simply not prepared to put the effort in to make the relationship work.
As the old adage goes, actions speak louder than words.
#15: He Parades His New Woman In Front Of You
Sometimes people stay in relationships out of convenience, but somehow end up meeting the love of their life during (or after) a breakup.
If you know that you and him were never truly emotionally committed to each other (or you were emotionally committed but he wasn’t), and now you see him proudly introducing you to his new girl…then…it’s probably over.
Sure he could be doing this out of spite, but eagerly introducing you to a new love is him sending a clear signal that you have been replaced.
Being replaced is never a nice feeling.
But ask yourself this question:
Do you feel bad simply because your ego is taking a hit?
Or do you feel bad because you were deeply in love with this man?
If it’s the former, it’s ok, you can easily recover and you should really look forward to a greater love in your future.
If it’s the latter, then, try to remember that we all experience unrequited love at some point in our lives.
Love is like that:
It’s never perfect.
And your journey is never perfect.
Sometimes it’s going to sting badly, and you’re supposed to learn as you go along.
Sometimes it tests how resilient you are and whether you love yourself enough to grieve, find a new meaning, dust yourself off and open your arms to embrace your real lover.
To help yourself move on, it’s a good idea to develop what we call a “High Value Mindset.”
A high value mindset will help you trade in your insecurities for self esteem and confidence. CLICK here to check out our course “High Value Mindsets.”
(The promise of this program is to give you the ability to “trade in” your anxiety and insecurities for self esteem, self worth and intrinsic confidence, so that no one will ever take you for granted & high value men will recognise you as an indispensable “keeper”.)
#16: It’s Been A Long Time Coming
One of the biggest signs he won’t come back to you is that this breakup has been long and arduous, but especially arduous on you – because you’re tired from all the effort you’ve put in to try to make things work.
If this breakup has been a long time coming but you were in denial or trying desperately to hold on, well, it’s time to let go.
Even if there’s a chance you guys might reunite, you’ll have a better chance to achieve that union if you let him go first.
(And FYI, some studies tell us that there’s a 50% chance for couples who break up to reunite)
#17: He Won’t Interact With Your Friends or Family
If he avoids your mutual friends whom he used to speak to, that’s a red flag. The same is true for family.
Sometimes men do this because even when you guys were together, they were only interacting with your friends and family out of obligation to begin with.
And sometimes men do this because they want it to be over for good (and avoiding mutual friends or anyone you’re close to helps them achieve that end goal).
Regardless of the reason, if he’s avoiding all your friends and family, even going out of his way to avoid them and refuse to make eye contact with them, then he likely has no feelings left for you.
What to do From Here?
Here’s what you should do now.
Step 1: Add up the number of signs.
The first thing to do is to add up the number of signs you see from the list.
If you see 5 or more signs, that’s enough to be a huge warning signal that you should prepare for the reality that he won’t come back.
If it’s more than 7 signs, he definitely won’t be coming back.
If you see less than 5 signs, (say 4 or less), then you can conclude that he’s losing feelings for you or that he at least needs a break.
And if that’s the case, you may want to consider going no contact.
Why?
Because going no contact will allow him the space he needs in order to process what he feels and perhaps realize what he lost.
It will also give you a chance to work out what you really feel. I mean, beyond just wanting to hold onto the relationship.
Perhaps you just want to protest the breakup as you resent having to go through the pain.
If that’s the case, then you probably don’t really love him, and instead, you should force yourself to go through the grieving period.
Step 2: Grieve.
After working out how many signs you see from the above list, (and if you see enough signs), it’s time to grieve.
Even if you two do get back together, it’s still beneficial for you to grieve.
This is because it will cleanse you of the excess emotions around the history of the relationship and the breakup.
Step 3: Become a high value woman.
There’s nothing more important than becoming a high value woman, because this gives you purpose, but it also makes you more desirable for all men.
Which means it becomes easier for you to attract a high value man and cut ties with the wrong man (ahem, your ex perhaps).
There’s no more powerful position for you to be in as a single woman than to build your intrinsic value.
Men want women of intrinsic value, and there’s no going around that fact.
If you want to learn how to become a high value woman to men, read my article on The 6 Traits of High Value Woman (& 3 Traits to AVOID).
Now for the frequently asked questions.
Frequently Asked Questions
What makes a man come back?
Being in love makes a man come back.
Being attached (but not being in love) can make a man come back.
Also, wanting sex and attention makes a man come back.
Your job is to work out which one it is through testing.
You can test a man using high value banter.
CLICK here to discover why you as a woman need to use the dark art of “High Value Banter” in order to quickly weed out the wrong types of men and create emotional attraction with the “BEST of MEN”!
(…Even if no man has ever given you any love and all you’ve encountered so far are pen pals, ghosts, booty calls, and incredible duds!)
Don’t know what the dark feminine art of “High Value Banter” is? CLICK to find out.
You can also use the test I shared in this article:
CLICK here to learn How to Test Him to See If He Cares?
Will he realize what he lost?
Only if he perceives value in keeping you.
Simply losing someone doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. I’m sure you can relate to this – sometimes losing someone is the best thing that can happen to you.
So if he was really stupid to let a good thing go (if you added a lot of value to him but for some reason he pushed you away), eventually he will realize what he lost of course.
He just won’t realize it if he thinks it was no big loss in the first place. Make sense?
Do guys always come back?
No, not always.
If a guy has healthy health esteem and is securely attached, then most of the time, a breakup will be pretty final.
This is because it takes a lot to make them abandon a relationship in the first place.
If on the other hand a guy is emotionally unstable or insecurely attached, he may likely come back, because sometimes insecurely attached people push you away due to fear and inability to feel safe in the relationship.
Let him go he will come back to you: true or false?
In some cases, accepting the breakup will increase the chances of him coming back to you sooner.
But most of the time, this isn’t true. Just because you let a man go doesn’t mean he’ll come back.
Sometimes doing this can make him come back out of fear of losing you.
But is that really what you want to achieve?
You want a man to come back out of fear of losing you? Is that what builds a healthy relationship?
Isn’t it better to have a man come back to you because he’s in love (which is the ultimate relationship security?)
Here is why:
When it comes to romantic relationships, a man being in love with you is the best thing you could have, because this is what forms a pair bond and inspires him to want a committed relationship.
Act like you don’t care and he will come back: true or false?
You may as well ask if by being inauthentic, this will make him come back.
Do you want a man to come back because you acted like you didn’t care?
Or do you want him to come back because he’s deeply in love and wants to commit to you for life?
On that note, did you know that there’s one specific emotional trigger in every masculine man that inspires him to want to take care of you, worship you and deeply commit to you?
P.S. CLICK HERE to check out my full article archives! Or you may greatly benefit from one of our highly popular paid programs, CLICK HERE to see what we offer right now.
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Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
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