There are 3 main aspects of a Goddess:

1. Leadership

2. Feminine appearance

3. Presence and Charisma

The Definition of a Goddess: A female God or Deity. A woman of extraordinary beauty and charm. A greatly admired or adored woman.

1) Leadership

No woman can ever truly be a Goddess without being a Leader. You must lead people in to higher good. You cannot be a follower. I don’t mean manipulating people. I mean being absolutely untouchable in your personal conviction. It doesn’t matter whether you are religious or not, you can make people happier, and make the world a better place. (Click here to take the quiz “How High Value High Status Am I on Facebook?”)

Whatever you believe in, you don’t have to force it upon people to lead them. You just have to have everybody’s best interests at heart. Discover what is possible by giving, rather than holding back. You do not need to ‘compete’ with people, or judge them.

If you didn’t know this before, know it now. The majority of the people you meet in your life will have low standards for themselves. To be a leader, you must have the highest standards for yourself. You must not settle for anything less than you can be, do or become. You can be a leader and still be a feminine woman. Leadership doesn’t mean being masculine, leadership simply means you:

Believe when everyone else doubts

Inspire people

Lead rather than follow

Become an example of what is good, do good and don’t exude negative energy

Care for others when no-one else will

Never ever give up

Follow your dreams with absolute conviction

Love even when people don’t deserve it

Give without expecting anything back

Seek understanding rather than resorting to quick, easy and subjective conclusions

Teach others what you know, and add value even when you feel they are in ‘competition’, and even when you are afraid. Give others access to the resources that you have.

Never settle for anything less than you can be

Give and do more than anyone else can possibly expect of you!

2) Feminine Appearance

This is all about the outer appearance that makes you more feminine.

– I can’t stress enough how much a strong mane of hair helps. It needs to be healthy and well taken care of. (If you have curly hair, that’s perfect! Health is everything and it shows through your skin and hair the fastest). Feminine women do not find taking care of their hair a chore. They revel in the femininity and beauty that their hair gives them. Brush your hair regularly and condition it. See this post for more information on conditioning your hair.

– taking really good care of your skin. Drinking lots and lots of water. If you’re thirsty, you’re already dehydrated. Drink water regularly and avoid getting dehydrated. This will help you flush out any unwanted toxins in your body and keep your body clean.

– most real men are attracted to a woman’s eyes and her smile. Use these!

– wearing a nice lipstick helps. Nude colors are great, as they look natural and makes you look even more alluring and mysterious because it doesn’t seem like you’re wearing any lipstick.

– do everything with grace and passion! If you’re dull, it cancels out any other efforts you make!

3) Presence and Charisma

Having presence means your energy is noticeable. It means that when you are with people, especially your man, you put your whole heart and soul in to being with them. Not try to look like you’re listening and then look in to space – but be 110% present.

Presence also means that you can command people’s attention without being boisterous or obnoxious. It means people will turn their heads and listen to you. Not because you’re odd, or offensive, but because you’re ah-mazing 😉

Charisma is a personal quality or spiritual power that gives you influence over others. It doesn’t matter what happens to you, or what’s going on in your life, or how easy it is to give up on things, etc, there is always something more inside of you. A spiritual quality in your personality that understands people’s pain, and that has compassion.

The spirit is a vital part of having presence and charisma. The spirit is the part of you that is present, but cannot be seen. The spirit represents consciousness, and your spirit transcends any physical beauty and lasts for much longer than you can live. You can wow any audience, and you can wow any man with your charisma, or spiritual quality.

Let’s face it, physical beauty fades. Your spirit will not. It doesn’t matter what happens to you on the outside, no-one can take away what you embody in your heart and soul. Yes, physical beauty has it’s value, but only so much. A woman can grow her hair long, and do everything that makes her look feminine regardless of the placement of her  physical facial features! (Click here to take the quiz “How Naturally Feminine Am I Actually?”)

Remember that this is all about becoming more self-aware. You’re not being fake, manipulative or ‘not yourself’. You’re bringing out more of yourself. A truly feminine woman has un-shakeable confidence and knows that there is more to her than what is visible. Femininity starts from within. 🙂 (read my article about how to be feminine)

If you haven’t downloaded the “Goddess Report”, click here to get it for free.

You are a goddess and you can attract any man, but what triggers attraction? Click here to find out the 17 Attraction Triggers and get him hooked.

Also, lovely, if you haven’t said hi yet, do leave me a comment and connect. I’d love to hear from you!


  • Super Janice

    How can I know whether I’m feminine or not?

  • Najat

    I am a little sad about my hair and sad about thinking like this… My hair is so tightly curly and shrinks and even though i take good care of it and live healthy it doesn’t get past a few inches under my shoulders stretched out, when it shrinks it’s over my shoulders. I just want flowing curls/waves that run down my back.. But it’s a two hour job to flat iron my hair and I don’t think extensions are really feminine, i just think about when your man is running his hand through your hair and feels the extensions, not very romantic?

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  • Jennifer Schonberg

    hi rennee
    I am a male but for a long time been into understanding femininity and by gods grace been blessed with a uberfeminine goddess for my wife. Being an astrologer i am curious about sun sign, kindly let me know.

  • Really loved this article! Think the advice is amazingly good! Thank you for sharing! x

  • keith

    I looked under your heading “who is Renee” but no answer? who are you? and whats your back ground? do you have kind of qualifications? What makes you the person who can advise or is this reading dribble?

    • Hey orange haired keith (the only thing we appear to have in common), how’s optimus investments going?

      Just a woman who went through a lot of relationship pain and found answers for myself. Answers that work for me, and for some others, too.

      The only qualification I have is a Law degree and a lifetime of giving a shit.

      We live in a new world Keith, not sure if you noticed. And that means people who care are listened to and sought out. Qualifications are secondary to giving a shit.

      Do you want to tell me what really pissed you off though?

      • La’Chris Jordan

        Renee, you’re so freaking awesome. I’ve been reading your newsletters for a few weeks now and I don’t think I’ve ever asked, “What are her qualifications?” You have amazing WISDOM and that’s all that matters to me! BTW, I’m going to steal your line, “The only qualification I have is an (insert degree) and a lifetime of giving a shit.”

  • Cherry

    Hi Rene,

    Beautiful article! You gave me lots of inspirations!

  • Nina

    Hey Renee,
    I’d be very curious to know, did you or other women from here noticed a change in their physical body after really changing from the inside and beeing more feminine ? I believe that it can heal a lot of things on the external level as well if we take on the responsibility to change ourselves. Maybe it could have an impact on the hormones balance, on the skin…? Did anyone experienced that?

    • Great question Nina…I think there would be changes due to less stress in the body!

  • Anais

    Reading this validates what I already knew. I’ve recently realized I have zero charisma and all the women I know in healthy relationships have tons of charisma, charm and playfulness. So the men never get tired of them and will adore them forever, and they always have an easy time finding a good man.

    Whenever I attempt such things it comes off awkward and unnatural. I get a feeling it turns men off and makes them judge me thinking I’m awkward and they see there’s something wrong with me. It’s no wonder I can’t attract any good men for a relationship and only for sex…and I don’t want casual sex so that does nothing for me. And if I were actually able to attract a man enough, he’d get tired of me and leave or cheat.

    The thing is I understand what men are attracted to in women, but I don’t have enough of it. I’m only good at attracting them sexually, dressing up feminine, and showing vulnerability in letting them do for me. But I have no charisma and find it so hard to express my feelings when there might be conflict

    • Riv

      Aww, hon, I don’t believe this for a second. I’m sorry you feel this way, and I used to feel the same. I was hard, cold, and very cerebral (in reality, just completely terrified of rejection). When I was growing up, when I was validated and loved, it was based on my brain, scathing wit, and future career paths — most involving the title “Dr.” I was never validated on beauty of heart, kindness, or anything energetic or feminine. Thus I grew up thinking that I was only good for my brain. Sometimes I actually wondered (really!!) if I was an android and didn’t really know it…because I never attracted a man for longer than a month.

      I have been with the man of my DREAMS for two years now, and I have tried to push him away based on the same limiting beliefs you describe above no less than ten times. It almost worked several times.

      When you feel that you have no charisma, know that it is there, and your fear is blocking it. I know this feeling very well, because I also become dead and dull when I’m AFRAID and WORRIED about how I’ll come off. I think what Renee is conveying in this article is that to have that charisma, charm, and all the rest, you need to let go of fear and be completely in the moment.

      There is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with you. Repeat that, and act as though you believe that about yourself. Sit there, and let it soak in. The only thing that is wrong with you is that YOU think there is something wrong with you. I used to be so serious, and when I first attempted to be playful, I was WORRIED that it would come off as awkward, so it did. It is a little bit of a practice thing. You have to be kind to yourself, and shut off that brain.

      No one (almost) has enough of all of these qualities if they’ve grown up in this society. No one starts out perfect. You can also choose to be any way you like, and maybe you’ll start out *trying* harder, but the real point here is to help you STOP trying and START embracing who you are without fear! Your message drips fear, and nothing else. I don’t mean to sound insulting, but a therapist was extremely helpful when I was working through my many self-limiting beliefs, and I believe you would also benefit. It’s the kindest thing you can do for yourself.



      • Joan

        I absolutely love your post. I was looking up confidence today, and this really hit home. It made it easy I was struggling. I’m trying to be a leader but I always feel out of place. So I guess I have to stop trying.

        It wasn’t just what you were saying but I can tell you are passionate about it. I’m writing this down in my little book that I take with me everywhere. If you don’t mind of course.

        Thank you Riv

  • Marianne

    Renee…I love your articles and have found them to be so helpful in discovering the sheer joy of living and loving my authentic feminine self. I do take issue with articles on having long hair. Oh how I would love that. But as a recent breast cancer survivor, with my hair finally growing back in, it is difficult to feel.feminine every time i see my reflection. And then to read such emphasis on long luxurious hair as being a staple for femininity…it makes me so sad. Can a woman not still be sexy and desirable without a long mane? I was fortunate not to lose a body part, but begwen the surgical scars and the boyish hair…what is a woman to do?

    • Leigh

      Marianne, your inner strength MORE than makes up for the lack of long hair. 🙂
      Congratulations on surviving the battle.

      And yes, you can be such a sexy beast with the shortest of hair. I know many women that have short hairstyles that are absolutely foxy.

      I think the most attractive thing is a woman that isnt afraid of who and what she is. Wear your scars with pride. Speak to people, strangers, friends (anyone who wants to listen!) about your experience with vitality, tenderness, vulnerability and strength.

      With love

  • I found your blog posts today and I love them! As a woman coming into her feminine power, beauty and grace, it’s amazing reading a blog that feels written with feminine love 🙂

  • Donetta

    I have learned a lot about how men work and think by reading a lot of these articles on the feminine woman page. I appreciate the information; it really helps to add comfort and enjoyment in my relationship with my man.

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