What to Do If He Takes You for Granted…

What to Do If He Takes You for Granted

My question to you is this: is it true that your boyfriend or husband takes you for granted and only makes time for you when it suits him? Or is it that it’s too easy for you to feel like you are not special? (Click here to get your “Goddess Report”)

In other words; are you making up the story that he only fits you in when it’s convenient for him, in your head?

Here’s why I ask: feminine women seek attention; we thrive on it and we need it to feel feminine (many women will sell their souls for some attention from men) – BUT it’s not always beneficial for women to seek it out because it’s a dead end trap; most attention is cheap and short-lived. It can come and go as fast as it comes.

So maybe the truth is that YOU have a RULE about how much attention you OUGHT to receive in order to feel loved?

And, that is very dangerous. To you. The more rules you have for how you feel loved, the less love you will find.

How many people are you going to let go of because you are more like a 10 year old girl in a relationship who stomps her feet in fear when a man appears to actually have a life outside of you? (Why can’t I be loved for who I am?)

And how long are you going to pretend that you cannot already exist AS love, radiating love and warmth, WHENEVER you choose to, and not have your happiness dependent upon how much attention other people can give you?

Here’s the truth: Maybe, you have more spare time than he does. Maybe, you get bored more easily. Maybe he is more active than you are and enjoys always doing things and you’re more of a home body.

Here’s a fundamental truth about men: they don’t have that much attention to give you. And if you want him to give you attention, you need to train him to do that by positively reinforcing him when he does give you attention.

Eg: he FINALLY calls you – what you DON’T do is say: “OMG, FINALLY you call.” This is a major downer for him to hear/feel from you.

He doesn’t notice the time; he’s busy, he’s working, he’s focused, he’s being a man; all those things that actually cause you to be attracted to him. Remind yourself of that.

I’m here to suggest something important to you: that you actually just want a man who is truly PRESENT with you. Who is intensely masculine, who owns himself and gives you deep attention, not cheap attention. But to GET that, guess what? You must be the other half of the equation. This kind of quality presence from a man demands a high quality and highly evolved kind of feminine energy (the type where you choose to exist as love even when you feel UNloved).

Would you agree?

If it really IS true…

There’s another side to this problem. Maybe a man really IS only letting you in his life when it suits him. It happens, and it happens a lot, to a lot of women. It’s happened in my own life. As I’ve said before, sometimes, we really are somebody else’s back-up option.

But  this is usually obvious; because usually what happens is he keeps other women around, talks, calls and texts other women, you guys break up and when those women are off the radar, he asks for you back, and you go back – sometimes because secretly, you don’t feel that you have many other options (You DO).

I wanted to ask; do you really believe that he is only making time for you when it suits him?

If you do, and you STILL want to be with him – then it’s time to make him feel a sense of loss. This is not selfish, it’s something you have to do with everyone in your life. Friends, relatives, co-workers…we are ANIMALS….we are going to take things for granted, not because we are bad people, but because someone up there, or evolution (whatever you believe in), made us that way.

It’s our own responsibility to train others to value us. We are not babies, we are responsible adults, aware and conscious of our own relationships and aware of our own ability to SHAPE our relationships and teach others to value us. (Click here to take the quiz on “How High Value High Status am I on Facebook?”)

On the odd occasion in life, we might find someone who is evolved enough to not take us for granted, and actually values the idea of not allowing him or herself to take you for granted. These people are rarer than rare. I’ve only met one; my husband. But my boyfriends before him were not that way.

How do you make a man feel a sense of loss?

You stop being desperate for his attention, and fill up your need for attention elsewhere.

That’s the first step.

The next step is to NOT respond when he “comes back” out of convenience. Make him work for what you guys have together.

People WILL come back to you if you are/were High Value enough in the first place. If you added enough value to their lives, they will fight for you. They will feel loss. It’s natural and it’s human nature. 

NOTE: I didn’t say” DON’T RESPOND. I also didn’t say REJECT HIM. I said: don’t respond WHEN he comes back out of convenience. When is he coming back out of convenience? How would you know? You may not know to start off with; but you will learn through life experience and through having the courage to be present with your own thoughts and actually looking at the situation objectively, putting all anger aside.

Look; there’s a difference between doing this from a nasty, malicious place. I am well aware that 90% of women who read this dating advice will jump up and down and go ‘yay!!” and think this is PAYBACK and ignore that man out of a feeling of payback for the terrible feelings they feel about not being put first.

I don’t intend this advice for those women.

I intend it for you.

Do it because you KNOW something about human beings; that we will, from time to time, accidentally take people for granted, we will get self involved, that men might do that to you. and just like the mammals that we are, we need to be pulled in to line by a well-meaning lover, or friend who cares enough to preserve the value of the relationship by not being available when the other person is contacting us out of convenience.

This is what I would want my own friends to do. Indeed, my man does it for me, and I respect that.

The final part of the puzzle is: are you courageous enough to actually train others in what it feels like to lose you?

Because many of us aren’t. We fear we don’t have other options, if we were to be too unavailable for one particular person. We fear that they would hate us and leave us. Well, sometimes, they’re going to hate us. Again, we are animals. We’re not logical, ever-so-perfect mammals. Anyone can hate you whenever they want, without notice. Even you hate yourself sometimes, don’t you? But you are not dying from it are you?

If you’re not, then why not give this a go?

If you want to get a better understanding of how to understand men, click here to check out our Understanding Men Program. Or check out the rest of our programs by clicking this link. 

Have you ever done this with a man you were dating? Maybe you’ve done it to a friend? Have you got any reminders/tips for other women on how to do this with dignity and self respect? 

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What to Do If He Takes You for Granted | The Feminine Woman
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Learn how to properly react when your man takes you for granted. Do not lose your high value and high status personality. Read more to know how to cope with this situation.
  • Elizabeth Bella Jane

    After being in relationship with morgan for seven years,he broke up with
    me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I
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    the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice
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    answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for
    everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he
    loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we
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  • Alonso Robert

    If your wondering how to regain the all you lost during your addiction mostly family and job, the first thing is to remember it my never happen! Even if you’re putting consistent effort into changing your way of thinking and living, that doesn’t necessarily mean every family member is going to be ready to dive in to a new relationship. Sometimes, a family’s trust has been unraveling over years and years. It won’t be rebuilt over night or at all.The best thing to do in early recovery is either to focus on living sober and healthy. Quitting drugs, or no longer drinking, isn’t sufficient change for the addict. Your entire perspective on life, patterns of thinking, and living habits also need to change Otherwise, you’re essentially the same addict or alcoholic, only without the substance or just contact this spell caster he has helped a lot of people get their lives back including me when all seem to be hopless he always shrine the light of remdeption and hope. He fix all problem and i know this because i am writing this from my personal experience.If you have been reading comment online about this spell caster Obudun Magonata it will be easy for me to tell you this that he couldn’t get any more really that he is already. I have come to a conclusion that the gift he possess and his good heart are the strongest most powerful thing i have ever known. He is the most straight forward person and most understanding anyone can ever meet. He did not even ask for my money he just asked me to get materials that will be needed for the spell and that was it. To start, i am an alcoholic and also have a strong addiction for gambling. I lost almost a 100 grand on internet gambling and still did not stop at the same time i was drinking heavily i got suspended form work for a duration of four years because of my drinking problem & my home, i destroyed it with by myself. I was unfaithful to my wife several times and she knew what was happening, i kept yelling over nothing on my girls. My addiction to gambling and drinking was complimentary i was losing a lot of money and still playing and was drinking a lot to calm my nerves. The addiction made me numb my feelings was gone. My wife , my girls saw me as a monster. I remember this day, my wife told me it as my second girl’s birthday the other week and my responds was “grown *** girls don’t celebrate their birthday and if she wanted to she can as well go get a job so she can use want she earn to celebrate every day of her life”. I still can’t believe i said that to my wife and on top of that her sister was right there. My wife was hurt it was written all over her face her face and she told me ” I don’t even know who you are any more where is the man that use to be the human shield of this family ? that man would never had said anything to hurt me or his kids you don’t even care that you are scaring h*** out of this girls? one more of this and i am out” there i told her i don’t need them they were weighing me down that there were burden on me. Those words still hunts me till this day i can believe i really said all those words. My wife left me and off course with the kids and foolish drunk me happily signed the divorce papers. Honestly i don’t know maybe it because i was drunk most of the the day, i felt go i get gambling and kept drinking losing big and winning little waking up with different ladies on my bed every morning. I was like this for two years, and i felt i was on top of the world but my friend made me see i had nothing anymore his wife won’t let him talk to me or hang out with me i gradually felt empty. At a point i saw i needed to get clean and actually committed to my self to AA off course it was hard to admit but with my friends help i got committed. I was six months clean from alcohol and gambling when i discovered my wife was see another man and they were going to get married. I was still in love with her. She was mad when she saw me, she wanted nothing to do with me, my girls hated me because of me they could not even look at me. I tried to get close and got a restraining order. I needed to be my family again i know i ruined it by myself i just wanted to make it up to them i failed then and i wanted to redeem myself to show them the man that use to be the human shield of his family is back i found him again. Obudun Magonata was the man that help me made it happen. It was the course of find a away to reach my wife i found this great spell caster. I did not have the privilege of meeting but like he told other he had helped, some of them met him in real time. He told me after the spell casting my wife , my child will love me like we never fell apart they would know i messed up but they will not care about it any more. I got the materials that was required of me by i got i mean i asked him to help me sending over to him the total cost because most of the materials where only found in the heart of Libya. Just after the spell process was concluded a package was sent to me i can’t disclose its content but it rest easy it could not even harm a fly. He told me what to do with it and all he said will happen happened. I had my family back my wife , my child and i are once again that happy family i lost. I was still on suspension he told he i will get a call to come back to work and i did just after all he did for me. This spell caster he has something that saves lives. Am glad i met him all he promised me he did i wish i could me more grateful. I will leave his email contact like those other person that did in there comment or article which ever this is spiritsofobudunmagonata ‘ at ‘ ‘ yahoo ‘ ‘ dot ‘ ‘ com . I know you all know how to make use of this email because email have a standard format use it in that form++++

  • RobertAlonso

    _If you have been reading comment online about this spell caster Obudun Magonata it will be easy for me to tell you this that he couldn’t get any more really that he is already. I have come to a conclusion that the gift he possess and his good heart are the strongest most powerful thing i have ever known. He is the most straight forward person and most understanding anyone can ever meet. He did not even ask for my money he just asked me to get materials that will be needed for the spell and that was it. To start, i am an alcoholic and also have a strong addiction for gambling. I lost almost a 100 grand on internet gambling and still did not stop at the same time i was drinking heavily i got suspended form work for a duration of four years because of my drinking problem & my home, i destroyed it with by myself. I was unfaithful to my wife several times and she knew what was happening, i kept yelling over nothing on my girls. My addiction to gambling and drinking was complimentary i was losing a lot of money and still playing and was drinking a lot to calm my nerves. The addiction made me numb my feelings was gone. My wife , my girls saw me as a monster. I remember this day, my wife told me it as my second girl’s birthday the other week and my responds was “grown *** girls don’t celebrate their birthday and if she wanted to she can as well go get a job so she can use want she earn to celebrate every day of her life”. I still can’t believe i said that to my wife and on top of that her sister was right there. My wife was hurt it was written all over her face her face and she told me ” I don’t even know who you are any more where is the man that use to be the human shield of this family ? that man would never had said anything to hurt me or his kids you don’t even care that you are scaring h*** out of this girls? one more of this and i am out” there i told her i don’t need them they were weighing me down that there were burden on me. Those words still hunts me till this day i can believe i really said all those words. My wife left me and off course with the kids and foolish drunk me happily signed the divorce papers. Honestly i don’t know maybe it because i was drunk most of the the day, i felt go i get gambling and kept drinking losing big and winning little waking up with different ladies on my bed every morning. I was like this for two years, and i felt i was on top of the world but my friend made me see i had nothing anymore his wife won’t let him talk to me or hang out with me i gradually felt empty. At a point i saw i needed to get clean and actually committed to my self to AA off course it was hard to admit but with my friends help i got committed. I was six months clean from alcohol and gambling when i discovered my wife was see another man and they were going to get married. I was still in love with her. She was mad when she saw me, she wanted nothing to do with me, my girls hated me because of me they could not even look at me. I tried to get close and got a restraining order. I needed to be my family again i know i ruined it by myself i just wanted to make it up to them i failed then and i wanted to redeem myself to show them the man that use to be the human shield of his family is back i found him again. Obudun Magonata was the man that help me made it happen. It was the course of find a away to reach my wife i found this great spell caster. I did not have the privilege of meeting but like he told other he had helped, some of them met him in real time. He told me after the spell casting my wife , my child will love me like we never fell apart they would know i messed up but they will not care about it any more. I got the materials that was required of me by i got i mean i asked him to help me sending over to him the total cost because most of the materials where only found in the heart of Libya. Just after the spell process was concluded a package was sent to me i can’t disclose its content but it rest easy it could not even harm a fly. He told me what to do with it and all he said will happen happened. I had my family back my wife , my child and i are once again that happy family i lost. I was still on suspension he told he i will get a call to come back to work and i did just after all he did for me. This spell caster he has something that saves lives. Am glad i met him all he promised me he did i wish i could me more grateful. I will leave his email contact like those other person that did in there comment or article which ever this is spiritsofobudunmagonata ‘ at ‘ ‘ yahoo ‘ ‘ dot ‘ ‘ com ‘

  • alic benson

    OMG!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony i have ever
    seen..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 30TH OF JUNE 2013,
    after my husband separated me and my marriage of 7 years was broken down
    and i was totally inconsolable and without hope because i have tried all
    means to get my husband back after much pleading and did everything
    possible to make sure that he comes back, but nothing worked out for me….
    And i saw a marvelous testimony with this email adress
    akharespelltemple@gmail.com of this powerful and great spell caster called
    Dr AKHARE on the forum.. And i saw how Dr AKHARE reunited a family and
    brought the Husband of a woman back to her in just 48 hours..I never
    believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about magic before..
    Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not
    until Dr AKHARE did it for me and restored my marriage of 7 years back to me
    and brought my spouse back to me in the same 48 hours just as i read on the
    internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my husband came to my
    house and knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept him
    back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don’t know how much to
    convey my appreciation to you Dr AKHARE.. you are certainly a God sent to me
    and my entire life and family.. he did his work just as he guaranteed me in
    48 hours and it yielded an optimistic result to me and i was able to get my
    Husband back. right now my Husband has falling so much in love with me and
    my kids like never before. This spell casting isn’t brain washing but he
    opened up his eyes to see how much i love and wanted him, i really don’t
    know how best to be grateful to you Dr AKHARE for bringing happiness into
    my life and family, and now i am a joyful woman once again.. here is his
    Email: akharespelltemple@gmail.com, or connect him with these number +2348102799882
    //

  • alic benson

    OMG!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony i have ever
    seen..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 30TH OF JUNE 2013,
    after my husband separated me and my marriage of 7 years was broken down
    and i was totally inconsolable and without hope because i have tried all
    means to get my husband back after much pleading and did everything
    possible to make sure that he comes back, but nothing worked out for me….
    And i saw a marvelous testimony with this email adress
    akharespelltemple@gmail.com of this powerful and great spell caster called
    Dr AKHARE on the forum.. And i saw how Dr AKHARE reunited a family and
    brought the Husband of a woman back to her in just 48 hours..I never
    believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about magic before..
    Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not
    until Dr AKHARE did it for me and restored my marriage of 7 years back to me
    and brought my spouse back to me in the same 48 hours just as i read on the
    internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my husband came to my
    house and knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept him
    back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don’t know how much to
    convey my appreciation to you Dr AKHARE.. you are certainly a God sent to me
    and my entire life and family.. he did his work just as he guaranteed me in
    48 hours and it yielded an optimistic result to me and i was able to get my
    Husband back. right now my Husband has falling so much in love with me and
    my kids like never before. This spell casting isn’t brain washing but he
    opened up his eyes to see how much i love and wanted him, i really don’t
    know how best to be grateful to you Dr AKHARE for bringing happiness into
    my life and family, and now i am a joyful woman once again.. here is his
    Email: akharespelltemple@gmail.com, or connect him with these number +2348102799882
    ….

  • alic benson

    OMG!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony i have ever
    seen..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 30TH OF JUNE 2013,
    after my husband separated me and my marriage of 7 years was broken down
    and i was totally inconsolable and without hope because i have tried all
    means to get my husband back after much pleading and did everything
    possible to make sure that he comes back, but nothing worked out for me….
    And i saw a marvelous testimony with this email adress
    akharespelltemple@gmail.com of this powerful and great spell caster called
    Dr AKHARE on the forum.. And i saw how Dr AKHARE reunited a family and
    brought the Husband of a woman back to her in just 48 hours..I never
    believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about magic before..
    Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not
    until Dr AKHARE did it for me and restored my marriage of 7 years back to me
    and brought my spouse back to me in the same 48 hours just as i read on the
    internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my husband came to my
    house and knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept him
    back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don’t know how much to
    convey my appreciation to you Dr AKHARE.. you are certainly a God sent to me
    and my entire life and family.. he did his work just as he guaranteed me in
    48 hours and it yielded an optimistic result to me and i was able to get my
    Husband back. right now my Husband has falling so much in love with me and
    my kids like never before. This spell casting isn’t brain washing but he
    opened up his eyes to see how much i love and wanted him, i really don’t
    know how best to be grateful to you Dr AKHARE for bringing happiness into
    my life and family, and now i am a joyful woman once again.. here is his
    Email: akharespelltemple@gmail.com, or connect him with these number +2348102799882

  • Lyd

    Today, I want to use this opportunity to tell everyone about Dr igbodo of {igbodospiritualtemple@gmail.com}, on how he help me reunited with my husband after 2 months of divorce.My husband divorce me because he saw another woman in his office and he said to me that he is no longer in love with me anymore and decide to divorce me.I seek help from the Net and i saw good talk about Dr agbuza and i contact him and explain my problem to him and he cast a spell for me which i use to get my husband back within 2 days.am totally happy because there is no reparations and side-effect. If you need his help Email him at {igbodospiritualtemple@gmail.com}

  • Myanna

    Thank you. That’s advice really made me realize a lot. And now im not as stressed.
    I’ve been with my bf for about a year now, he moved in with me about 3 months ago, things were going great, I got attention, and felt appreciated. Then about 8 weeks ago i found out i was pregnant, and my hormones are all weird. My bf doesn’t give me any attention anymore, i’m lucky if i get one kiss, (peck) the whole day. He does not want to have sex anymore, nor even cuddle, I’m always getting mad at him before and after work, or crying. Because he always says he will do this or be home for dinner at this time, but everything he says is not true, everything he says is a lie moreless. And to top it all off ever since he moved in, (and his dog.) He does not do anything, yeah he works 12 hours a day as a used cars sales man. i do everything and i have a 4 year old son as well. I make him breakfast in bed, and lunch everyday, do his laundry, take care of his dog, make him dinner, and more, and when i ask him for any help he makes a big deal out of it, and changes the subject, or makes me feel guilty that i’m asking him for a hand. He never answers my calls or text messages throughout the days. and even knowing i’m pregnant, i don’t want to end up loosing this baby inside me, but i’m so stressed lately and upset, and emotions are ……i don’t even know sometimes……i feel so lost, so unattractive, so lonely. I need some advice, something, I cannot go on like this anymore, i feel like i’m getting more and more depressed by the day

  • Reena

    can u help me in saving my relationship – Please

  • seema

    I need to share many things, I need your help else I will lose myself soon…

  • seema

    I need your help…

  • Miss_hollykins

    Great :), this is just the type of article I needed to read! Not just with men, but with people in genural.

    It’s funny because every time I walk away from a situation, I end up loosing out, but not anymore! Because I can feel my fighting spirit kicking in!

    Now I feel that I can say whatever I want to others and it really won’t make any difference whether others go or stay, as I’d much rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I’m not.

  • Nora

    Renee can you elaborate more on how exactly to make him feel this sense of loss? I am confused: you say don’t respond “when” he comes back out of convenience. I can totally see what you are saying, I am just not sure how to carry it out literally. If I don’t respond then isn’t that ignoring him? I am not sure how to talk to him if I am not supposed to reject or ignore him but I am supposed to “not respond” Could you give examples of dialogue?

  • Martha

    Hi Rene,
    I never listened to any type of relationship advise when I was younger because I thought my romantic life was so unique that no one could know better. My two long term relationships with younger men not only left me older and lonely, but very confused and still ignorant regarding relationships. The first time I felt frightened about love was when I accepted that I didn’t know how to keep in my life someone I love so much… not only I didn’t know but I helped pushing the relationship its unavoidable end… I was in the middle of my last crisis when I read that there was hope for making my ex to come back. That was originally my interest on your emails.
    I still read all your emails and I thank you so much for educating me about what to learn about myself and how to re gain my integrity as a woman… how to love myself and what to trigger in me to nourish it… and… how to understand what the man in my life are, how they differ from me and what to do to keep him in my life … not only forever, but forever in love with only me.

    I don’t regret my past relationships. I still love them both in a different way but now I am searching for a man near my age and i read your emails to learn more about what to do and what not to do to retain a man I really like. I can still get a little revelious when I think it should be the other way around but when I think about the difference in numbers like the fact that there are less and less good and real men left not only because women outnumber men but because men marry or turn gay … and that besides facing that much younger in age are the woman I am competing with for the same type of man – I am 51- There is any space left to question that I am happy you are there for woman like me I can learn from. I don’t take for granted that you are doing most of the work. I am only just here slowly preparing for the love of my life and I am planning on keeping him forever in love only with me just like you do with your husband. I appreciate you so much for all your help Rene. Thank you.
    Martha J.

  • FunnyMe

    Oh man.. this article hits the spot. I met a man almost a year ago and we started dating. Everything was great and moving along at what I thought was a serious relationship pace. I was wrong. I started noticing that he would be texting all of the time and would check his phone a lot. My first instinct is that he was seeing someone else. But why would he check in front of me? He is VERY career driven and cannot seem to stop thinking about work even when we are together trying to watch a movie. We broke up 6 months later because he said he didn’t have time to give to me. He also was planning his future and moving out of state for a year in the next 6 months and he didn’t want to do a long distance relationship etc. I was devastated and I still am to a certain extent. He wanted to be friends and I decided no, that I needed space and time to get over him. 3 months down the road he contacts me numerous times and I finally respond. He is apologetic and hates the way we ended because I mean so much to him BUT he doesn’t ask to get back together. Instead we try to be friends again. NOTHING has changed between us. We went back to hanging out and doing things that we used to EXCEPT there is nothing sexual happened between us. People think we are back together and I got so used to hanging out with him that I didn’t think of the ramifications to my own personal life. He just moved out of state in which I helped him move and now I have radio silence for 4 days. I know this isn’t a lot but when we had been hanging out every day and texting/talking every day to nothing it seems a little like I am a friend/faux girlfriend out of convenience. I can’t seem to let him go because he has emotional issues that i choose to not discuss here that have me wanting to not put too much pressure on him BUT I also need to let this go. I KNOW he will text me. Probably about his day and how he is doing and he won’t even realize how his silence has affected me. I have not reached out to him and I won’t , but when he does reach out to me I am unsure of how to act. We were just friends at the end, but I wanted more and I am fearful that if I stay just a friend to him that he will continue to keep me as just that. I will miss him more than you know, but I need to move on with my life. I don’t know how to respond. I don’t want to ignore him but I also don’t want to encourage him either. Help!

    • Anita

      Honey if he’s not ready for a serious relationship right now, I guess all you can do is decide if you love him enough to wait for the long haul.
      If not, like you said, it hurts you to be with him when the situation makes you feel a convenience. I’d say in this case use Renee’s advice and find a way to be a giver and not a pleaser.

    • Ali

      If your parents were both 6s, your mother could have spent her 20s hooking up with 8s – but your father couldn’t have. Young women days often do that these days. However, when these women reach their late 20s / 30s they will have to drop back down to dating 6s if they want to secure commitment. This process is difficult to accept because after 10 years of hooking-up with 8s she will have to realize that in fact she was only a 6 the whole time (the same applies for 5s hooking up with 7s, 4s with 6s etc). Truly hypergamous women never realize/accept it and so they keep getting dumped, or stay single.

      Women in their 20s often have a vastly overrated sense of their value and think that male 8’s are in their league when the women are only 6’s or 7’s.
      That’s the hardest lesson for women to learn, that they can get sex with men that don’t love them that much, that aren’t into them, that will even stick around for a steady supply of sex and companionship for a couple years, but these men don’t love them deeply and sure as hell never intend on marrying them (though complacently sliding into marriage or kids does often happen).

      Basically it’s quite hard to find a man who’s really into a woman and that the woman is really into. I think probably half of women are fairly hypergamous (meaning they only feel strong attraction and romantic love if they guy is of somewhat higher value or better) and these women are going to struggle because their minimum threshold is too high.

  • pawni gupta

    Its been couples of month…. I m being ignored a lot… Bt now i realise dat m over reacting…. He still dsnt cal me daily bt tym to tym hv cntct wid me nd meets me…
    Thanku for making me feel nrml nd back again :)

  • mcharm

    Hi Renee,

    I thought at first I would join your courses, to get my ex back, but the more I read your findings, the more I realize that this is about getting back me, and finding the High Value Woman inside of me. If my ex comes back it is not through my desperate attempts at getting him back as I was doing before, but because he wants to be back. It is confusing him, my new behaviour of being nice to him, fun but not expecting anything or any love. Before everytime I saw him, I would be expressing myself to the bone, now I say hi, be nice and leave where he is. It is a wonderful feeling and I thank you.

    • http://www.thefemininewoman.com/ Renee Wade

      Great to hear this Mcharm :)