If you stop bringing surprises to your relationship, then eventually and inevitably, the attraction and the passion will die. You will lose connection with your intimate partner, you will no longer have that fun, flirty atmosphere that you probably would hope for.
You’ll live life in the “same old” ways and nothing will bring much excitement to your day. Your partner will feel the same way towards you. Everything becomes too familiar, and nothing is new… And worst of all, it will become more interesting and more exciting for your partner to spend time with other people and NOT you.
Now, I don’t know about you, but I certainly don’t like the idea of my partner enjoying time with someone else MORE than time with me… and I’m sure we can all relate to that. So I don’t like the idea of my relationship being so weak and fragile.
However, if you do make it a habit to create surprises in your intimate relationship, on a regular basis, then you get the opportunity to create and maintain the attraction and passion any time you wish.
Our brain loves new things. Every time, we stumble across a novelty, dopamine is released in the brain. This is one of the “excitement” or “feel good” chemicals in your brain. So if you bring surprises into your relationship regularly, then you can maintain and build on the “feel good” factor.
You and your partner will be happier in the relationship, less likely to stray and look around, less likely to be keen to spend time with other “new” people, and more likely to come back to the relationship and be fulfilled.
You will be able to maintain that flirty freshness to your relationship, years and years into the relationship, without much effort. And you will create for yourself a relationship that other people will envy.
Use the Power of Anticipation
Think back to those moments as a child, waiting for Christmas Morning to come so that you can rip open your presents. Why were you so excited? You hadn’t even discovered what your presents were yet!
It’s because when we anticipate something, we feel the emotions already in our body. If it is good anticipation, then we start to get excited, even if we don’t know what’s coming to us. We just have this positive expectancy about it…
So when you go and create a surprise for someone else, you want to get them to anticipate something good happening. That doesn’t mean you have to go and spill the whole surprise, it just means you get their juices flowing, tease them with an appetizer.
It’s like a quick trailer for a blockbuster movie. You just get a taste, and you draw out the excitement.
Use the Power of Misdirection
Misdirection is in essence, guiding someone’s focus onto a certain topic, and then at the same time, creating that surprise moment.
It is one reason why magicians or illusionists are able to create such wonderful illusions. They misdirect the whole crowd and make the switch when nobody expects it. This is what surprises are, something that you didn’t expect. So learn to be a bit of a magician, and learn to guide other people’s focus where you want it to go.
Remember, misdirection is a very powerful strategy to create ANY effect you wish.
Reveal the Surprise with Love and Care
Love and be cared for are the ultimate emotions that I think us humans ultimately seek. So in other words, in whichever situation, love and care is something that we would always want to feel and experience.
So this is why, if you were to create an outstanding surprise, then you need to make sure that the person feels loved and cared for during the whole process.
Focus on the little details and make it perfect. Remember, the ultimate judge of your surprise is the reaction from the friend or lover who you are trying to surprise. So my rule is, do whatever it takes to get the biggest, sweetest reaction you could possibly get.
Remember, at the end of our lives, we’re not going to remember all the events of our lives, but we will remember the moments that STOOD OUT. Those outstanding moments that we couldn’t ever forget. So when you’re creating a surprise, keep in mind that you want to aim to create such an impact that the memories will last a life time.
Since it’s Renee’s birthday, (and it only happens once a year…), I’m going to hold a 4 day only birthday sale.
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Please, just take 2 seconds to wish Renee a happy birthday! It will light her up more than you can possibly imagine.
She has really given this blog her heart and soul and it would really mean a lot to me (and her of course), if you could send her some love! Remember, she doesn’t know that I’ve posted this yet, so let’s put together a HUGE surprise for her!
Thanks deeply once again!